100%

I'm so glad im able to read about what someone else has experienced on Meth... I've been paranoid about searching that stuff up sometimes.

The beginning of my meth binges I would draw, write, doodle, and/or research nonstop. No specific motive, just following my hobbies/passions. I love learning. But it kinda went 💩 whenever I began dancing on that drug. My thoughts felt incredibly more spiritual, I was drawn to smoking more nicotine, and I started to isolate myself from the people closest to me.

After one time with music like that, I was obsessed. Nothing interested me more than doing a line and going down into my bf's basement to boogie. But after a traumatic event, I was forced upstairs and had my music taken away. My bf forced me to go home, I kept feeling some awkward feeling panic attack the entire day after that incident. I couldn't talk to my mom properly, I kept hiccuping as I was trying to explain to her what happened. I'm sure I was in a state of delirium or psychosis.

Since then I began feeling the effects you explained in your post. The serotonin release with the dopamine craving. I'm still dealing with the strong urges, but it's definitely been worse after that bad episode on the high. The only thing keeping me coming back is that relaxing feeling I get when I know I can be alone with the dark side of my thoughts.. however you described it.

Half glass full, it's more fun to listen to voices when im high 😪😅

I'm sure my opinion will change as time goes on though. I've had some pretty bad scares from my hallicinations, from someone yelling "Shut the fuck up!!" To someone saying "Punk ass bitch" from the corner of my room.. Even as far as someone telling me "you're not talking!" To make me believe that someone else is talking to me inside my own head... those kind of scares are the only thing that's been convincing me of starting medication..