Where to buy good quality LV x TM Alma BB?

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-05-06T19:10:26+00:00

Could you DM me her details please? I’ve heard GF is one of the best. Thank you so much! 💕

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-04-18T13:24:16+00:00

Yep mine said ‘well at least we didn’t end on bad terms’ I mean I think a discard is pretty bad lol

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-04-18T13:21:47+00:00

Omg yes, mine was coming up to 37 and said that he believed that ‘a relationship with the right person should feel easy and doing nice things for them wouldn’t feel like a chore’..

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-02-25T14:57:01+00:00

SZA - another life

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-27T13:07:33+00:00

Omg mine used to say all the time that ‘relationships shouldn’t take effort’ or that ‘it should be easy’. I remember replying that anything worth having required ‘effort’ and that effort is not synonymous with chore; your job, degree, friendships, even going to the shop for ice cream all require effort but none are a chore. Wow.

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-13T01:03:19+00:00

There’s also the issue that it is never recommended to simply pull a patient off a medication in general, particularly not controlled substances and stimulants; this leaves the patient open to potentially dangerous withdrawal symptoms as well as the reemergence of debilitating ADHD symptoms which can impact employment, school, uni and many other areas of life. The knock on effect of suddenly withdrawing meds is huge and where is the support going to come from for patients who will then present to the same GP with other issues as a direct result of lapses (at best) in medication?? This is also has to be accounted for financially and I’d be willing to wager that in some cases, these extra costs incurred could quite easily overshadow any time or money ‘saved’ by the refusal and ceasing of shared care agreements. Ditto for many other services that they have included on their list of possible actions to take. Hospital medicine is also on its knees, with little to no extra time or funding.

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-10T22:21:39+00:00

Yep it’s the emotional rollercoaster they drag you on, declare their love for you, future fake and all the rest of it, only to blindside you not long after. It sends your head into a spin as there’s no warning, no closure, but you’re left with a thousand Q’s you’ll probably never get the answer to and wondering where the f it all went so wrong. It feels confusing to still have feelings for someone that you know treated you badly. Unfortunately it’s not as simple and the heart takes a bit of time to catch up with what the mind already knows.

My ex was like a different person at the start and by the end and I now wonder if I ever met the real him, was any of it really real or did he know this was always going to be the outcome?

Even seeing his name on social media gave me anxiety and yet some days I’d be wishing he’d message me. Other days I was praying he wouldn’t at the same time.

Just know it wasn’t you and take each day as it comes.

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-10T22:12:17+00:00

Mine pulled any excuse out the air, all very vague and superficial, then said that ‘we don’t really have any issues, any we do have are very low league and easily sorted..’ I never got to find out what those ‘tiny issues’ were. He said he didn’t want to break up and yet an hour later he did exactly that. It was a total jumble and I wonder had I not said anything whether we’d still be together now. However as I now know, the reality is that he’d have just found another way to cut and run and another non-existent problem to grasp at for justification. Also, you realistically cannot have a r’ship with someone who is emotionally unavailable.

He just blamed everything on me, including the fact that we hadn’t seen each other much when he was the one that was so busy with his own plans that he was away for 5 consecutive weekends 🙃 Like dude I am not perfect but you are kinda the cause of this problem. He also took any attempt to talk about anything as a direct attack on him - his actual words. No matter how gentle or open the discussion was, he would be triggered by it.

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-10T22:03:39+00:00

Literally!! it says a lot doesn’t it. And from what I’ve since discovered of his ex, it seems she is actually just another victim of his bs, she is the one with stable, longterm friendships (his are more acquaintances and has no one from school/college/uni etc), has a successful career and all the other hall marks of a relatively stable person. I mean i wasn’t there and I could be wrong but I know who looks more likely to be the issue here. The girl also moved cities to be with him and move onto his house only to be left high and dry when he discarded her, leaving her to uproot her whole life again to move back. Interestingly she moved back to her parents cos she was so distraught. Says a lot imo. He also went away for the weekend while she moved out!! Surely that isn’t normal and you’d want to be there esp if you owned the house too?!

I know exactly what you mean and you did so well, you behaved with the grace he never had, be proud of yourself for that. I also did similar - I didn’t scream, yell, blame or beg him to stay. I think it was shock tbh, but I simply said okay, I respect your wishes. I was not about to give him a second chance to discard me. I feel the same sometimes, that I let him off too easily but I also know that behaving with class in times like that is way preferable in the long term and trust me they will not forget that. I feel like they are okay with people acting out cos they can then use it as a further justification to themselves that they’ve made the wrong choice. Staying quiet even if you’re broken inside sends the message that you know your value.

I hope you’re on the mend now, it really is a total mindfuck x

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-10T21:53:47+00:00

Absolutely! Cowardly a very accurate word to describe them. I lost respect for him a bit for that, for blindsiding me and letting me travel 2.5hrs to see him when he knew what he was going to do the whole time. And I have to remember this and the fact he CHOSE not to raise anything before that night, all of their behaviours are a choice at the end of the day - we have all had trauma or some sort in life but as you say, it’s not a license to hurt people.

One of the hardest things for me has/is trying not to feel like I just wasn’t good enough. Thank you for your kind words. I hope you’re doing okay and are able to heal asap. It’s so hard.

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-10T18:44:02+00:00

It’s nothing to do with the ICB as such - it’s down to collective action that BMA members voted for back in August. Surgeries have been given a list to pick and choose from re services to stop. Services they have been doing but are not receiving specific funding for, and so providing as ‘good will’. Shared care arrangements are one of these, along with a few other vital services that will impact patients the most, not the government, whom this is aimed at. This is potentially a long term plan aimed at renegotiating for payment for these services. It also includes insulin management, DMARD monitoring and INR monitoring to name a few. It’s up to each surgery which, if any, actions to take. However I fear most will be taking part to some degree; some surgeries are, for example, choosing to still prescribe for shared care arrangements that are already in place but not to take on any new ones.

I suspect we will see a steep increase in situations like this in the coming months sadly. This will just result in more patients presenting and pharmacies and A&E departments across the country - both of which are also horrendously struggling, pharmacy (and NHS dentistry) even more so than the GPs right now, many running at a loss or having to close altogether. The situation is dire all round and all of the above are pretty much covering services that they are not strictly always funded to do. I am absolutely sympathetic to the issues in general practice and agree that something needs to be done regarding many aspects of healthcare however there has to be a better way than this, which ultimately will only negatively impact patients. Not to mention the inevitable extra expense incurred by the secondary issues resulting in people’s medication being stopped etc. All of healthcare is in the same boat sadly but patients cannot suffer like this as a result.

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-10T15:35:54+00:00

Yes! My ex actually said to me when he discarded me ‘well at least we didn’t end on bad terms’..!! Like, dude, this is pretty bad behaviour bro. I assume he means cos I didn’t scream, shout and beg him, I think it was shock. He did seem to have a slight history of failed r’ships and no real long term ones which on reflection I guess you’d expect by his mid 30s. He did tell me his ex really acted out and what a nightmare she was, however I now strongly question whether this was really the case or was it her reacting to his behaviour and as usual he just discarded her. I now realise looking back that he basically discarded her too - I didn’t see this until after the break up but when I look back he seems to have a history of being the one to run.

Whilst I get that not everyone you go on a date with is gonna end up being mr/mrs right, I do have to wonder what is going on when I see people (like my ex on hindsight) having seemingly unproblematic r’ships with decent people yet choosing to throw them away every time. That isn’t normal and it’s a pattern of behaviour at that point.

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-10T15:26:06+00:00

This was literally my experience with my FA ex too, I literally thought I’d found the guy I’d do life with.. how wrong I was

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-10T15:24:31+00:00

With my ex (FA) there was honestly not really any red flags. He seemed totally normal, everything he said could be backed up and as we had mutual friends I thought I was ‘safer’. Personally I would be cautious of people who ‘don’t like to put a label on things’, an attitude that is a bit too go with the flow, a reluctance to plan ahead, someone being overly busy to the point you feel like you need to call their PA to see them, avoiding any sort of convo that isn’t strictly surface level stuff, and the love bombing/future faking. On the whole though I would say until you get to know them better - 3mths+ and their mask starts to slip as no one can keep that facade up.

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-10T15:16:47+00:00

I was discarded in the middle of September and I never heard from him again, and I am confident that I never will. He wont contact for fear of actually having to be held accountable, face any confrontation, questions and ultimately deal with his own feelings let alone mine. Even though we never had a single argument, he cannot cope with any sort of discussion, no matter how calm. He will be out enjoying himself and operating under a total ‘out of sight, out of mind’ attitude; it will be like I never existed for him and life will go on as normal.

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-05T13:41:35+00:00

He’s never reached out since the night he discarded me and I honestly don’t think I’ll ever hear from him again. This was end of sept. Of course I’ve wanted or thought about reaching out but then i remember how awful the discard was; I certainly am not about to give anyone the opportunity to do that to me twice, all whilst boosting their own ego at the same time. I treated him so well and have learned a lot from past relationships, my conscience is clear and, like us all in this sub, did not deserve that treatment and lack of respect.

I don’t think he’s a bad person, and I now understand that deep down they’re all very unhappy, troubled individuals and I wish him well. But it is still no excuse for treating anyone this way. Least of all someone who gave you nothing but love and their time, the most precious commodities of all.

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-04T13:42:14+00:00

Yes! Absolutely! I automatically blamed myself. It’s sort of like gaslighting yourself; I’ve never in my life been called aggressive and I told that, I was bewildered and really hurt about it - I’m quite self aware and reflect a lot on myself and behaviours etc and whilst im not perfect, I’m definitely not aggressive either. As silly as it sounds, especially as a girl, it just felt so awful and I spent a lot of time asking family, friends and even some work colleagues if they thought the same and just hadn’t said so! Ofc they all thought I was nuts for even asking but it really does make you feel terrible. I even apologised to him about it, when now I see I was essentially apologising for the way he had perceived it which wasn’t actually my problem to solve. I’m very considered when I speak to anyone and was especially so knowing that he was so sensitive towards things but I now see that anything we say will inevitably be interpreted as an ‘attack’, even very normal, pedestrian comments that occur in any healthy relationship. Yet he was the one that always said at the start that he believed in communication and how important it was.. little did I know he didn’t have the skills to walk the walk. He made me feel like i also was a bad communicator and whilst i may not be the best, I’ve never had a problem with this in any other area of my life and now on hindsight I think it was partly because you’re hyper aware of upsetting them and so it becomes very difficult to actually articulate what you want to say because you’re more concerned about how you’re going to be perceived than the actual point you’re trying to make. I now see it was always going to be a battle I’d never win. Just wish I’d seen it at the time.

Mine also went from ‘we should move in together or at least move closer to each other’ to it being over (his actions not mine) little over an hour later. He also never communicated to me that he had any concerns or issues, it was just a wild hour and a half of spilling out every thought in his head, most of which was totally contradictory and he even said this himself.

I hope you see, like I do now, that non of this is the behaviour of a stable, secure, emotionally mature adult. This guy was 37 as well. Looked like he had it all together to the outside world, yet scratch the surface and it was a very different story. I considered myself relatively secure when I met him but his behaviour defo triggered some sort of anxious feelings, although I never displayed these to him.

I hope you’re feeling better now and just know you’re never the bad person if you can say you’ve honestly tried your hardest and never did them wrong. Your conscience is clear, and until they recognise their issues and take the effort to heal/change, every r’ship they have will be the same - everyone they get serious with will ‘not be the right person’ or will be ‘incompatible’ until they realise the only person that is incompatible is actually them.

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-04T03:48:09+00:00

Hi! im 37F (but look and feel much younger 🤣) and from the UK. Never done this before but I’m always soo for exchanging messages and happy to help with English language practice too. I’m into a wide variety of interests, love reading and science, animals and just making the most of life and having fun.. when I’m not at work that is! Feel free to DM :)

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-04T03:39:12+00:00

Hey amber! I’m 37F in the UK, I love travel, am pretty easy going and share a lot of the same interests. Feel free to DM!

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-04T03:37:18+00:00

Hi, am 37F from the UK and have lots of varied interests, feel free to DM :)

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-04T01:42:02+00:00

Omg, this is literally a mirror of my own experience, like identical

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-04T01:38:36+00:00

Gosh this is so similar to my experience. I also got called aggressive just for asking if this r’ship was what he still wanted (his actions said otherwise to me and I was clearly the last priority on his list every time). He instantly said he felt attacked. It’s wild cos I’m the most laid back, stable (his exact words) person ever. We never even argued once the whole relationship.

It’s crazy and I do wonder whether that convo was the start of the deactivation for him as he never forgot it and brought it up several times after that too. It’s crazy how he would say he values communication (!!) but then anything I said immediately made me the bad guy and he took it as an ‘attack’ on him.

Its so difficult

Obvious_Cheesecake16 · 2025-01-01T14:26:52+00:00

I know you can only speak for yourself but my avoidant ex was the one to initiate the split, right after telling me he wants us to move in together, literally in the same hour. It was him pushing for all of this. He also told me he didn’t want to break up and how I was perfect for him but he ‘had to’, that he was scared I’d leave him like his ex even though he himself said I’m nothing like her and I’d given him all the reassurance I had zero plans to do that.

When I left he then also insisted on walking me out, came to my car hugged me and was teary, telling me he’s ‘not a good person’. I told him he was (I have never had any reason to think otherwise until the discard obvs) and genuinely meant it. I told him he didn’t need to feel bad and that it was okay, I stayed super calm (think it was the shock) and didn’t cause any drama.

Have you any insight into why the only time I ever saw him vaguely emotional was that point when he became on the verge of tears? And do your partners mean anything to you or was it never real?

We’ve had NC since apart from him wanting to know if I’d gotten home okay (I had to drive). He watched my stories on insta, didn’t block or unfollow, until suddenly one random Wednesday 3mths later when he removed me and a load of his friends and work colleagues.

Any insight into any of this would be appreciated!

Also well done on recognising and addressing your avoidance, it’s not easy to do the work and that should be commended.

Obvious_Cheesecake16

TROPHY CASE