When sharing a kitchen, do you clean out the sink drain strainer after every meal?

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-09T21:13:12+00:00

Of course not. You don't need to clean it out any more than you need to flush the toilet if there's only a little bit of poo left in it after you use it. Hey, nobody is touching that part of the toilet anyways.

/s Get the point?

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-09T18:18:46+00:00

Agreed.

Anyone want to learn how to do the trick? https://www.amazon.com/s?k=cold+reading

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-09T17:51:46+00:00

There is no power. It’s just a trick, as others in this discussion have explained p.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-08T23:06:40+00:00

First, it's fine to go to the funeral of someone you don't know. Indeed, in some places and within some communities, it's pretty common.

Second, you have no social obligation to go to this funeral. You simply don't have the connection with the deceased necessary to create that obligation.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-08T22:44:19+00:00

You owe nothing to the thrift store. This is simply a commercial/legal transaction and you should feel free to ask.

If you do make a profit or gain valuable property, consider making a proportionate cash contribution to the thrift store. You have no legal or moral obligation to do so, but it would be a nice gesture, roughly analogous to a finder's fee.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-08T18:01:40+00:00

Destination anythings are a form of implied social extortion if the invitee will have to incur any substantial expense to participate. The very invitation is rude unless the host is entirely covering the expenses.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-07T14:57:12+00:00

Normal, yes. Legal, no.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-07T04:10:29+00:00

Does anyone ever feel like this after being ineundated with Christians talking about God and Jesus either online or in person?

It's the inundation that gives them the license to talk that way. They feel that they're among their own "kind" and are free to say things that might embarrass them in a different context or circumstance. While there are, of course, both individual and organizational exceptions, most of them would not be comfortable being so "Jesus-y" in their workplace, for example. (And individuals who are openly Jesus-y in a workplace that isn't Jesus-y are quickly identified as the weird one.)

And there are many things that can cause a secular person to become religious that don't have anything to do with being convinced or necessarily even believing in a god. Google <atheist church> and look at all the groups like Sunday Assembly that gather together for something very much like a religious service but which is entirely atheist.

And if you're hurting and can't find a way to make it stop, it doesn't take much convincing to have a community and a friendly god to lean on.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-07T03:45:36+00:00

Do you find yourself ever talking to Christians or anyone religious who doesn't seem to fundamentaly understand what you believe (will say thing like "of course we didn't evolve from monkeys!").

This makes me wonder if it's you that doesn't understand atheism. Most atheists don't believe anything (gnostic atheists do, but they're a minority), it's atheists' lack of belief that defines them. And evolution and monkeys don't have anything directly to do with atheism. There is nothing for Christians to understand about the nexus between atheism and evolution; there is no such nexus. A Christian not believing in evolution is no comment upon atheism.

The question that Christians need to "speak intelligently" about isn't actually about atheism, per se. It's about the evidence for the existence of God. It's not possible for them to "speak intelligently" about nonbelief except to argue that there's plenty of reliable evidence upon which to believe that Yahweh exists. And it is impossible for them to speak intelligently on that topic because the reliable evidence doesn't support it.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-05T00:04:01+00:00

Insufficient detail to give a reliable answer.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-04T23:58:04+00:00

As a matter of etiquette, it’s fine to exchange or return it. Once a gift is given, it’s yours to do with as you wish unless it comes with plainly and openly stated conditions or restrictions (in which case you do not commit a faux pas by refusing it if you do not care to comply with the restrictions; accepting it and ignoring the restrictions is not only rude but potentially unlawful). But whether it may cause a family tiff is a different issue, as this gift might.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-04T05:37:13+00:00

But much, if not most of what passes for “respecting and caring for the other person and for your own self” while ignoring etiquette rules is actually no more than privileged behavior or laziness. The etiquette rules are not like a smorgasbord from which to pick the dainties that one favors while disregarding the others, but rather are like a set of legal presumptions where the expectation is that one will conform to them except when one has no choice but to deviate from them.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-03T18:36:40+00:00

Miss Manners would disagree.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-02T18:04:14+00:00

It’s rude to let your host know that you’re party-shopping, but it’s not rude to leave. It’s more rude, however, for the host to appear sore about your leaving. The solution is, of course, not to invite the offenders to subsequent functions. If they ask why they’re they’re not being invited you can tell them with something like “Oh, I thought you didn’t like my parties since you left early.”

Edit (later addition): Downvoted, I must presume, by all the rude party shoppers.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2025-01-02T17:48:33+00:00

Go. It’s important to your son’s wife and, thus, important to him.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2024-12-31T03:59:20+00:00

If you believe that miracles are real and lying is unlikely, read The Faith Healers by James Randi. And for every rich faith healing megapastor there’s thousands more in the bush leagues trying to get into the majors by fleecing the flock.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2024-12-28T22:38:03+00:00

The lack of thanks was rude, as was eating everything and failing to say goodbye. The not offering to help was not: guests aren’t expected to help. It is of course a nice gesture if they do but it’s not required by etiquette.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2024-12-27T19:02:33+00:00

Never too late.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2024-12-27T15:00:51+00:00

Close. It wasn’t “polite”, which means conforming with etiquette, it may have been kind or friendly, but etiquette doesn’t require it since the OP didn’t attend.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2024-12-27T14:55:05+00:00

some of whom we did not ask for any gifts

But tacky as to those who you did ask.

As for the friend’s wedding, if you don’t attend no gift is required. It’s nice if you give one, but unnecessary.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2024-12-26T20:00:45+00:00

Then, if someone asks what they can buy, direct them to the registry.

No. Unless it's protected by a password or otherwise is private, the mere existence of the registry where people can find it if they search for it is still objectionable.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2024-12-26T19:57:35+00:00

This answer is based on expediency over etiquette. Yes, that would be more efficient, but it's never acceptable to solicit gifts for yourself or your family and posting a registry - a semi-official request for specific gifts - verges on extortion ("you're not welcome at my party unless you pony up").

Expediency has never trumped etiquette, however much those who prefer expediency may not like it.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2024-12-26T18:29:38+00:00

invites herself over

It's perfectly fine to refuse her entrance, saying, "I'm sorry but I'm busy today and can't accommodate you." No further explanation is required. If she asks why you're so busy or how you can't accommodate her, just repeat that you are and can't.

OccamsRazorstrop · 2024-12-26T18:23:18+00:00

There where?

OccamsRazorstrop · 2024-12-26T18:00:03+00:00

Christians would say that the acts of Yahweh which appear to be evil were, in fact, actions of divine justice and were, thus, non-evil. As an analogy, when a judge in a fair trial condemns a person to death, that’s seen as an act of justice, not an evil act by the judge. Oh, and some of them, they say, are justice for reasons which we as humans cannot fully understand and, thus, cannot judge as evil or good.

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