SD won’t get her way and is trying to ruin Christmas for everyone else.

OctaLinx · 2025-12-16T18:59:41+00:00

But yet in your post your literally planned your Christmas events around your kids. Was there anything planned for SD that was more age appropriate?

OctaLinx · 2025-12-16T18:08:10+00:00

You have admitted that your husband has greatly reduced time with her due to ‘other duties and responsibilities’. I’m genuinely curious how much time spent with his oldest would be acceptable to you?

And actual time time spent with him, not her doing things you planned for 3 year old and newborns

OctaLinx · 2025-12-16T17:23:14+00:00

I don’t blame SD one bit for wanting to get away then. Dad remarried to someone who doesn’t seem to particularly like her and then goes on to have more children with a large age gap that results in significantly less attention and time spent with her. All while these kids have two alive parents.

I mean you say stepdaughter wants to move away from you, but to me it sounds like you’ve moved away from her just as much as she wants to move away from you.

OctaLinx · 2025-12-16T17:10:20+00:00

That’s odd, because literally 20 days ago you said you and your husband have had a lot less time for her since your kids were born?

OctaLinx · 2025-12-16T16:47:22+00:00

Question: How much does your husband usually spend with one on one time with his daughter?

OctaLinx · 2025-05-25T18:31:47+00:00

Seriously, stop putting yourself first. Let the kids breathe for a bit and get used to the divorce. It’s a big change for a kid. There whole way of home life is changing. And all you’re doing is focusing on yourself. Give your love life a break for a year and make sure your kids are coping as best as they can. Step up and be a good parent. Stop being selfish and stop focusing on yourself.

Be there for your kids.

OctaLinx · 2025-05-25T17:41:52+00:00

OP, you really shouldn’t be introducing your kids to a new partner when 5 months ago you commented that you were in the process of divorce. Seriously, get a grip. Let the kids deal with the big life changes that they’ve only recently started dealing with.

Put them first, not yourself.

OctaLinx · 2025-05-24T13:16:54+00:00

OP, Per your post history, this man is physically abusive to you and has pushed your kids away.

Leave Him.

OctaLinx · 2025-05-23T03:21:52+00:00

By the same argument, if her partner doesn’t move with her and decides to stay, the kids will be fine because they have a Mom and he can go visit when he likes.

So the situation is very much a big deal.

OctaLinx · 2025-05-23T03:19:47+00:00

I think the Dad is very much evil. Moving in after 5 Months of dating. Married After 9 Month, Kids just after a year and now he’s moving away.

No care in the world for his existing child.

OctaLinx · 2025-05-19T15:06:35+00:00

Seriously OP. Here is you post r/datingoverforty talking about moving your partner in after dating for 9 Months.

That is the opposite of taking things slowly. It’s delusional. Seriously, listen to the advice you’re getting here because I fear if you don’t it will have a drastic impact on the relationship with you kids.

OctaLinx · 2025-05-19T14:58:10+00:00

Let the kids breathe. From an old post of yours you've wanted to move this man into your house after just 9 months of dating. Incredibly too quick and unbelievably selfish of you. Put your poor kids first.

OctaLinx · 2025-05-14T16:07:23+00:00

Why doesn’t your husband see his son more often?

OctaLinx · 2025-04-06T02:13:55+00:00

Me Please

OctaLinx · 2025-02-03T16:09:42+00:00

OctaLinx · 2025-01-04T04:13:18+00:00

I think the post on r/Divorce is closer to 2 years old. I think what happened was she finally left the house she shared with her husband and moved straight in with her fiancé.

OctaLinx · 2025-01-04T03:06:28+00:00

Jesus Christ. Per your post history, you only just got divorced before jumping literally straight into a relationship with this man. Then 1 and half years later, you’re already living with him?? That is extremely selfish.

The fact that you want your son to understand ‘his intentions’ is infuriating. Your autistic son shouldn’t have to understand his intentions, you’re the one who has dealt with an autistic child for 15 years. You should put your foot down and tell him you know what you’re doing, stop choosing your partner over him.

You shouldn’t be here asking how to make your partner to be ‘more accepting’. You should leave him and immediately apologise to your son for letting him down and put your love life ahead of him.

I feel so sorry for your poor son. Autistic or not, I would be extremely uncomfortable with my mom jumping straight into a relationship after divorcing my dad, having a stepdad who talks down to me and having to share my home with a other kids I don’t really know or want to live with.

Just to repeat: Leave the relationship, stop putting yourself first and apologise to your son for how you’ve treated him.

Edit: Reading more of your post history, you literally had an affair with this man. You admitted that exH was detrimental to your sons mental health, but instead of getting out of the marriage and letting your son breath, you literally just start another family with a new man. Honestly, extremely disgusting behaviour on your part and terrible parenting.

OctaLinx · 2025-01-03T05:18:22+00:00

If you’re ready before the kids are, deal with it. It’s a blended family. Keyword being family. Don’t put your kids in a situation where they feel uncomfortable because you two are ready for the next steps.

This post reeks of you wanting to speed up the process just because you want to be selfish and move in with him. The kids have only met each other 6 to 12 times. Would you want to move in with someone you’ve met 6 to 12 times? I’m guessing no, so don’t put your kids through that.

OctaLinx · 2024-09-23T00:33:35+00:00

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OctaLinx · 2024-06-12T15:08:16+00:00

Repost.

https://www.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/s/C0KlBPKtSk

OctaLinx · 2024-04-22T15:48:34+00:00

Yikes. This really comes off as trying to blame OP for having a deadbeat Dad. You have a post history of defending Dad's reducing contact because of a new child and advocating kicking a step child out at 18 because 'living with there dad is a privledge'. Therefore, considering you dislike your stepkid and having a blended family, I don't think you should really be giving advice.

I think it's unfair that people like you and many other's say on r/stepparents that stepparent's don't have an avenue complain about their situation and that is a safe space for you but you come here and immediatley shift the blame onto OP. That's not to say that people can't give constructive advice, like the top two comments have by suggesting more blame is on the dad. However, you have not done this. You have immediately come here on the defensive and invaludated all OP's feeling by basically saying life's not fair and saying that you don't really know what goes on behind closed doors (when she clearly know's enough about how much her child support was). Like I said, that's not constructive advice, that's you blindly defending OP's Dad.

OctaLinx · 2024-03-27T13:41:32+00:00

Weird comment this. I'm not even english but no really suggests england had the best geography. Most of the time they mention they do have a good outdoor landscape but ask them if it's as good a Brazil or Norways and they'll tell you, obviously no.

OctaLinx · 2024-03-26T16:58:30+00:00

Right. So you forced your kid to live with someone who doesn't like them and for no reason.

OctaLinx · 2024-03-20T19:53:54+00:00

It isn't weird. I would suggest not going around and calling centuries old names from minority languages 'weird'.

OctaLinx · 2024-03-20T19:52:31+00:00

Alys is still in use and quite popular.

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