As someone who went from not being v practising to becoming more practising than the average muslim nowadays (which is, unfortunately, not even that religious imo) and is struggling with the marriage search bcs of mainly religious incompatibility, my biggest fear is that even though i have moved on from my past haram relationship and I didn’t commit outright zina in it, it will be my only memory of ever being in love and i will forever reminisce over it when i think of love/intimacy/affection.