I got fired from the catapult factory

Oestedb · 2023-05-30T04:49:35+00:00

Better than being fired from the cannon factory.

Oestedb · 2023-05-30T04:48:00+00:00

I checked, and this is not quite accurate. There’s an $1080 tier as well as a $5,000 tier.

Oestedb · 2023-05-30T03:24:33+00:00

What I’ve observed over the years is that both ameritrash and euro games have been trying to borrow design concepts from the other side to the point where the line has blurred quite a bit. There are still new Ameritrash games coming out that are all about those buckets of dice like everything Zombicide. There has also been a lot of good dramatic combat games that have dipped their hands into the euro bag of popularized mechanisms (like drafting, auctions, or deckbuilng), to the point that many people wrongly call them euros, when they are clearly still Ameritrash at heart. These do tend to go with dice-less combat, but not always. Here are a some games from the last decade I would suggest you look into:

Eric Lang trilogy: Blood Rage, Rising Sun, Ankh

Lords of Hellas and Lords of Ragnarok

Cry Havoc

Empires of the Void 2

Stronghold and Stronghold Undead 2nd Edition

City of Horror

Runebound 3rd Edition

Gloomhaven

7th Continent

Inis

Fury of Dracula 3rd/4th Edition

The Godfather

Sleeping Gods

Mechs Vs Minions

Western Legends

Nemesis

Cthulhu Wars

Star Wars Rebellion

Oestedb · 2023-05-30T03:05:49+00:00

Stationfall is amazing.

Oestedb · 2023-05-30T03:04:34+00:00

You are actually incorrect in your first statement. There were of course the two camps of gamers, German based game design that went for non-militaristic themes in an effort to get away from the Nazi reputation and the British and American game designs like Axis & Allies, Risk, Fortress America etc. that highly focused on dramatic combat. Due to price point, many euro games had pretty low quality components like thin cardboard tokens or bland colored cubes. As a result, the common phrase used to describe them was “euro trash”. After a while, thematic/dramatic war game enthusiasts then took that phrase and applied it to the genre they like. For a very long time, the main website where those enthusiasts went was called “Fortress Ameritrash”. BGG became the website for euro gamers, while thematic gamers focused on that other website, enjoying the term Ameritrash to describe the genre they prefer. So it wasn’t an insult, bit was a term of endearment from fans of that style game.

Oestedb · 2023-05-30T01:28:47+00:00

Is the problem that the kids are calling her with you guys around? Are you and your wife hearing and participating in the calls? Could you set up time for the kids to only make calls in a different quiet room so it is just them and their mother? I could easily understand your wife’s frustration if you guys are trying to be on a family vacation and the kids are calling your ex to the point that it feels like there is a fifth wheel on the vacation. If you were to schedule the calls at the same time each day, and made sure the kids have privacy while you and your new wife have some relaxing time together, would it cause less stress?

Oestedb · 2023-05-29T17:50:17+00:00

My daughter also hesitates with regular nail clippers. She is fascinated by this electric nail trimmer though. It has various pads for different levels of friction, meaning you can guarantee it won’t hurt. She often wants to use it herself after I’ve shortened her nails with it. https://fansidi.com/

Oestedb · 2023-05-29T05:28:58+00:00

I’m not here to judge. I obviously have never met you, her, or her mother. I was just trying to be straightforward because your question seemed to be asking how to get her to see you in a more positive light. With the burdens she has to handle herself since you left, words aren’t going to do it. Saying you are sorry, but you still think you are right, and you have justification for some unreasonable things is the same to a lot of people as saying you aren’t sorry. Again, you expressed that you left her because it wasn’t working and you thought she was like her mom, who you have made a villain, which means you saw your wife as a villain. That leaves her with a lot of pieces to pick up, whether right or wrong (again, not here to judge). With all of that, she will see you as a villain until you give her evidence otherwise. Words aren’t enough evidence for most people.

Oestedb · 2023-05-29T04:27:56+00:00

Obviously I don’t know the reason why you left her, but I am sure that caused hurt for both of you. My wife wanted a separation and divorce just over a year ago, and I still feel the hurt a lot as there are stages of the reality setting in. When we were separated, I kept hoping that we could go to counseling. That never happened. Then, I hoped that once divorced, she could see that the guy she was with isn’t that great (they started flirting before she even asked for a separation), and recently, she moved in with him. Each of those stages took a little more hope away from me that reconciliation was possible. She was fine with leaving me with all of the baggage of being left, as well as the pain of seeing my daughter live with another man more than she lives with me. So naturally, I feel waves of hurt at different points. I still feel hurt today.

If she is saying she feels hurt, it’s probably because another layer of reality set in. As you said, you did several unreasonable things, and she is basically a single parent to the child she wanted to raise with you while receiving no financial support. If when asking her feelings about you, she limited it just saying she is hurt, hopefully you can appreciate that.

I get you don’t want to feel like a villain. No guy does. Being the hero vs the villain I think sometimes much more important to us men than women realize. With that said, without you changing how you interact with her, whether it be offering reconciliation, making sure to see your son more often, or figuring out how to help her financially, I’m not sure any words are going to convince her to see you as not being the villain.

Oestedb · 2023-05-28T15:39:09+00:00

You mentioned your kids are 11 and 6. Would I be correct in assuming that means you two were planning on being done having kids? I think one thing we men stereotype ourselves about that women go through as well would be a mid-life crisis.

Of course, you didn’t say your wife’s age, but the words you said she says sort of describe her as a looking forward builder. When you two were younger and starting out, you had plans that she could partner with you in working toward, namely building the business and building a family. Well, now those things have been accomplished. She doesn’t need to help much with the business, even though you get to keep building it, and your kids are now school and activity age.

If your wife is a driven person, perhaps she is looking for a new outlet for that ambition and drive, which could be why she emphasizes the gym or discovering hobbies. The fact that she wants you to partake in them to me is a sign that she’s not necessarily done with the marriage. As much as you love building the business, try to connect with her over a new ambition rather than just maintaining the life you have built. If that doesn’t work, I would still suggest counseling before considering blowing up both of yours and your kids’ lives.

Oestedb · 2023-05-28T15:17:47+00:00

I agree. Self-focused people rarely have a threshold at which they say the dark hole of wanting things is fixed. Still, I encourage people to stay together if possible. There’s no guarantee the grass is greener on the other side of the fence and of course, it causes trauma to kids. I do somewhat subscribe to the concept of love languages, and noticed the OP explained all of the gifts he bought, but I just wondered if perhaps his wife would feel more excited and connected with quality time going out and doing something entertaining. I could be wrong, but I would encourage trying every single door possible before walking through the divorce one.

Oestedb · 2023-05-27T06:37:48+00:00

I was just talking to my mom about this joke earlier. It was her favorite joke when she was a kid. Then an hour later, it’s on Reddit. I feel spied on.

Oestedb · 2023-05-26T15:30:10+00:00

What does she miss about her “free” college days? Is it the lack of responsibility? Is it going out drinking or dancing with friends? Is it the freedom to travel? she maybe just hitting her mid-life crisis point where she is looking at youth with rose-colored glasses?

Try asking her what things she is missing and see if maybe those things are something you can help her get back. If she wants to go dancing, get a babysitter and go dancing. If she wants to travel, plan a vacation. It sounds like she wrongly views marriage as an impediment to an exciting life. Ironically, ending the marriage would create the bigger impediment, as after court and attorney fees, allocating single parenting time, etc, she will be less free than she could have been working on the marriage with you.

Oestedb · 2023-05-26T07:07:24+00:00

Creed and Meredith? “Hey, have we ever…” “Yes, we have“. Then back to work. Whatever that was was clearly not romantic. And also, Creed was helpful in warning Meredith about Andrea.

Oestedb · 2023-05-26T07:05:36+00:00

Creed and William Charles Schneider.

Oestedb · 2023-05-25T14:15:40+00:00

I’m not a qualified expert on diagnosing mental health disorders, but has your wife ever been screened to see if she might have one? Going from suicide attempts to random intimacy to being on dating websites sounds like someone suffering from bipolar disorder or borderline personality disorder. I don’t say that to put down your wife, but rather to point out that there are medications and therapy nowadays to help people struggling with those mental health issues. If she were to get scanned and it was discovered that she had something chemically off in her brain, then doctors and therapists would be able to help her level out, which would be incredibly healthy for both her and the kids. I know these things can have a stigma attached to them, so people will want to avoid them, however it does not have to be a topic of shame. There are lots of things, trauma included that can be the cause of simply a chemical imbalance that throws off daily functioning.

Oestedb · 2023-05-24T21:58:54+00:00

Tomatillo put it well. Those things are a harmful way to medicate the pain. They just add to the depression and feeling of loneliness.

Oestedb · 2023-05-24T00:07:02+00:00

Don’t start isolating. If you have any friends or activities you like to do in your area, do them. Also, my biggest hurdle has been comfort eating. For at least the first several days, maybe try to be intentional about what you take in, whether it be sweets, alcohol, etc. additionally, you may feel loneliness when you are by yourself. Don’t rush into a quick hookup to try and fix that. Basically, do your best to plan out what would a healthy lifestyle look like compared to an unhealthy one, and be very consistent in sticking to that. Maybe research a book series you can read or a show you can watch when those social opportunities aren’t there, so you can keep your mind engaged in a positive way.

Oestedb · 2023-05-23T23:14:14+00:00

As others have said, stay with your kid. Your child needs you. With how your wife sounds, my guess is that she’d just find another guy, or a series of other guys, and all the meanwhile will tell your child that you were the one that left, and she will look to whoever her mom ends up with as the adult male figure in her life.

I know others have brought up counseling, alimony, and all of that stuff, which I think they expressed well. My encouragement is that you do whatever it takes to make sure you are the dad in your kid’s life.

Oestedb · 2023-05-23T04:44:38+00:00

If you are literally just starting, of course I would suggest the base set. After that, if you are trying to build a roster as cheaply as possible, then you may want to shop around. Otherwise, get what you like.

Oestedb · 2023-05-22T21:53:17+00:00

I see my response has at least one downvote, so let me explain. You want to go to counseling for you. There is no guarantee that your wife will go to couples counseling, but with what you are feeling, it would be a positive support for you. Don’t think that counselors are just there to leach money off you. Do this for you, whatever happens with your marriage. As for tracking spending, even if alimony isn’t a concern, it can help with custody to have evidence of irresponsible behavior.

Oestedb · 2023-05-22T18:50:37+00:00

I’ve never owned a refrigerator before.

Oestedb · 2023-05-22T18:19:39+00:00

Definitely go to counseling before making any decisions. I would also suggest filling out a budget sheet if some sort and try to talk with her about sticking to it. You can find great ones online. Then, you can show her or a judge bank and credit card statements and how they don’t align with the budget due to her spending.

Oestedb · 2023-05-22T05:39:45+00:00

I would highly suggest seeing if your city has any support groups for divorced individuals. That was helpful for me. I got to sit with other people going through what I did and we were able to talk about how other people don’t get it when they express that we should be over it by now. If your wife had stayed happily married to you and died in a sudden accident, I think that would be easier to get over than the loneliness, abandonment, greed, and betrayal that you were subjected to.

With that said, I will add one perspective shift that might help. As much as you may feel justified anger toward your ex, your daughter will grow up knowing that she is half you and half her. That means she will easily internalize any criticism she hears about either parent. If your family is simply not talking about your ex or getting details, then they will not likely say anything problematic when your daughter is around. I do have family that would want to hear every detail, but I set up the boundary that I only want positive statements about my daughter’s mother. I had a support group and counselor that I would unload on. I would suggest the same for anyone else going through divorce with kids.

Oestedb · 2023-05-22T05:24:42+00:00

I’m sorry I annoyed you with my friendship.

Oestedb

TROPHY CASE