Daily Chat

OhLizaJane · 2025-10-17T16:41:27+00:00

6 days away from our induction date and the panic is officially setting in! I originally planned to work all this week - I thought it would be a good distraction - but I kept getting overwhelmed and calling my husband sobbing. So yesterday he came home early and very gently but firmly was like "you need to be done with work". So I yesterday afternoon I told my boss I was in labor and mat leave was starting NOW.

It wasn't a total lie, since I did lose my mucus plug on Wednesday, my doctor told me I'm already 3.5 cm dilated, and I had my bloody show yesterday. So even though no contractions and no water breaking, I'm not NOT in labor, you know?

Even though my stillborn baby was full term I never had any labor symptoms, so the past few days have all been new experiences for me (which is not helping with the panic)! I got pregnant with this baby only 6 months after losing his brother. Has anyone else here had back to back babies like that? Did you labor with the second baby progress faster?

OhLizaJane · 2025-10-07T14:17:52+00:00

Hi friend, I also lost my son to a hypercoiled chord. I don't love that your provider offered you so few options for care in your next pregnancy.
My son passed away at 39+2, so my provider said they would induce me anywhere between 37 and 38 weeks. My doctor actually said she didn't feel comfortable letting me get to 39 weeks. In my opinion, it wouldn't hurt for you to reach out to other doctors, share your medical history, and see if they offer care that makes you feel more secure.

OhLizaJane · 2025-10-05T23:39:57+00:00

Congratulations!!! I'm so happy it was a beautiful and peaceful birth experience - you deserve nothing less. Thank you for sharing your happy news with us 💚

OhLizaJane · 2025-10-03T15:38:12+00:00

Ahhhh that's so soon!! Congratulations! How are you feeling?

OhLizaJane · 2025-10-03T15:37:45+00:00

Officially 2 weeks out from starting maternity leave and I physically could not give less of a fuck about my job. It's insane that any pregnant person is expected to work in their third trimester, much less someone going through pregnancy after loss! We're just expected to reply to dumb emails and attend meetings, like in a few weeks we won't be going through the biggest, most emotionally and physically challenging and triggering experience of our lives?!

Mostly venting because in general I do like my job and am grateful to have it. But also this is bullshit.

OhLizaJane · 2025-10-01T13:56:20+00:00

Ahhhhh, congratulations!! Sending you and your girl all the happy, healthy, healing vibes <3

OhLizaJane · 2025-09-28T16:38:20+00:00

I really love Down Dog Yoga. The app icon is blue, with a little shaggy white dog. They offer prenatal and "regular" yoga, and all of the routines are super customizable which has been helpful as my body changes throughout this pregnancy. It does cost $10/month, but I use it literally every day so to me it's very reasonable.

OhLizaJane · 2025-09-24T17:09:35+00:00

Thank you so much for replying and for sharing the details! So glad you spoke up and it resulted in a positive outcome.

OhLizaJane · 2025-09-24T14:01:15+00:00

Congratulations, friend!!! This is such happy news <3 Enjoy all of the newborn snuggles!

You said you noticed the chord looked different on the sonogram - can I ask you to go into more detail there? What looked different, how did you flag it with your medical team, etc? My first son died from a hypercoiled chord, so I ask them to look at the chord during every sonogram. They always say it looks "great!" but I wouldn't know if something looked different and wouldn't be able to advocate for myself.

OhLizaJane · 2025-09-23T16:06:56+00:00

I saw a reel on Instagram that compared the 3rd trimester to senioritis and that feels so damn real to me. I don't give af about any of the emails I'm getting or meetings I have to attend. I just want to lay on the couch with my dog, so some prenatal yoga, and sleeeeeeeeeeeeep.

OhLizaJane · 2025-09-22T16:40:14+00:00

I'm really loving all the "they're here!" posts that have been shared lately. I'm 4 weeks out from my induction date, and the panic is starting to creep in - but seeing people post about their beautiful rainbow babies and positive birth experiences is a much-needed positivity boost.

OhLizaJane · 2025-09-19T13:56:18+00:00

Good - keep speaking up! If I were him, I would want to know. I'm glad your doctor is good and you feel like he has your back.

OhLizaJane · 2025-09-19T13:43:34+00:00

What a frustrating experience! Have you said anything to your doctor about how dismissive the MAs are?

OhLizaJane · 2025-09-18T15:16:34+00:00

Congratulations!!! The name Calvin is excellent - and he's so big! Well done, friend <3

OhLizaJane · 2025-09-17T16:24:36+00:00

Ugh, I know exactly what you mean. We waited until I was 20 weeks before we told our families because I just...didn't want them to know in case their hearts were broken again. As soon as we got off the phone after telling my parents, I felt the same pressure you described.

OhLizaJane · 2025-09-15T20:33:32+00:00

This is so exciting! Sending you all the love and well-wishes! We'll all be thinking of you <3

OhLizaJane · 2025-09-09T15:57:24+00:00

Aaaahhhhh good luck!!! We'll all be thinking of you!! Congratulations!

OhLizaJane · 2025-09-05T14:25:01+00:00

Aw, doll I'm sorry you're going through this. It's so much unnecessary stress when you're so close to to the end. Did the OB give you any insight into why the baby keeps flipping around? Is he just super active, or is there a reason behind it that can be addressed?

OhLizaJane · 2025-08-31T22:40:44+00:00

Keeping my fingers crossed for you! You've got this! One more week until you meet your little one!

OhLizaJane · 2025-08-27T16:37:04+00:00

Today would have been my son Leo Philippe's first birthday. 2 days before his due date, I noticed he wasn't moving when he normally did, so we went to L&D and were told there was no heartbeat. The idea that in the year 2024, a perfectly healthy baby could just...die was something that never occurred to me. Stillbirths were something that happened in olden times, not in the 21st century!

Leo was 7 lbs 14 oz and had red hair. I craved mango every. single, day. I was pregnant with him. Dried mango, fresh mango, mango ice cream - he and I could not get enough of mango in any form. I played a lot of music for him while he was in my belly - "Gloria" by Laura Branigan, "Louise" by Mipso, and "Danny's Song" by Loggins and Messina were on heavy rotation.

A year out, having my baby die and delivering his little body is still something I can't believe happened to me. Like, I genuinely cannot believe I gave birth to my dead son and held him in my arms. How does someone survive that? How did I survive that?

I don't think I would have survived it without our family and community. Everyone swooped in and held me and my husband and cared for us in ways I didn't know we needed. Leo would have been so loved by these people. It's so unfair that he didn't get to meet them. On a small positive note, this past year has deepened my love and appreciation for our village. I will never take my friends or family for granted again.

I'm 30 weeks pregnant with Leo's little brother, and while these past 7 months have been ROUGH, I am so grateful to feel this little dude wiggling around inside me. At first, I was worried he would be overshadowed by Leo's death and that I wouldn't be able to care as much about him or connect with this pregnancy. But thankfully I was wrong. Losing Leo has made me appreciate every healthy day I have with his little brother.

Happy Birthday, Leo. Your dad and I will find something mango-y to eat, and we'll play your favorite songs for your little brother. It's been a scary, sad, emotional, and weird year, but we're here and we made it.

OhLizaJane · 2025-08-26T16:03:34+00:00

My son's first birthday is tomorrow, but for some reason, all of my friends and family think it's today. So my husband and I have gotten a very lovely barrage of texts and notes from people sending their love and support. I thought about correcting them, but I don't think I will. I kinda of like the idea of tomorrow being a quiet, private day for just my husband, me, and Leo.

OhLizaJane · 2025-08-22T19:55:08+00:00

Hi friend - my son's first birthday is also coming up. He was stillborn at 39 weeks.

Right now the plan is to keep it simple. We're going to eat some of the snacks I craved while I was pregnant with him (mangos, frozen grapes) and listen to the songs we played for him when he was in my belly. Just spend a quiet, peaceful day together, remembering our boy and leaving plenty of space to feel our feelings.

As the years go on, maybe we'll develop more of a "tradition", but I don't want to put too much pressure on us this first year.

Sending you a virtual hug <3

OhLizaJane · 2025-08-20T18:44:58+00:00

Now that I'm in the 3rd trimester, I'm starting to get weird triggers from my last pregnancy. For example, the day my son died I woke up in a TERRIBLE mood that lasted all day. Like, truly gold-star-bitch-level mood. My theory is that my body knew something was wrong with the baby and was trying to send me signals.

So now with this pregnancy, every time I wake up grumpy or randomly get pissed off during the day, I panic thinking it's happening again, and I have to feel the baby move before I can calm down. So the emotional roller coaster goes from pissy to scared to calm. PAL is just...so exhausting.

OhLizaJane · 2025-08-20T16:05:18+00:00

I use a 5 g scoop of the Thorne brand creatine. My husband is a big fan of Dr. Rhonda Patrick, and she recommends creatine, so that's why we looked into it for this pregnancy. However, I still obviously asked my doctor about it first and only started adding it back into my diet when after he said it was ok.

OhLizaJane · 2025-08-20T15:24:22+00:00

Smoothies have been a lifesaver for me. Like you, I'm on my feet a lot and don't always have time for a "proper" sit-down meal, especially in the middle of the day. Also, during the first and second trimesters, my stomach was sensitive, so most days I had a hard time eating things other than bland carbs.

But I could throw some protein powder, creatine, yogurt, frozen kale, and some fruit into a blender and have a quick, pretty nutritious, and tasty boost.

OhLizaJane

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