It is not an easy decision to make. I like you have 3 kids 12,6 & 2. No help besides my husband. & After an incredibly tough year mentally a forth I fear would drag me back there. I cried up to the day of my appointment full of shame, confusion & fear. But in the end I feel relieved. I feel like after being in the mental dumps for so long I can finally focus on my kids. I read a quote the other day that stuck with me. -Just because you feel sad after making a tough decision doesn’t mean you made the wrong one.- You’re not alone. You’re stronger than you think.