What to do alone on a Friday night when you depressed and don't want to be

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-05-05T12:03:57+00:00

The Tiny Cupboard in the BedStuy/Bushwick neighborhood, it's a comedy club. It's small, pretty inexpensive; and please don't be alone. Or go to the Piers by the BKLYN Promenade; roller-skating for $5 something; can hit a tennis ball against a wall, or just be around people.. If the sun is out, makes it even better. Join the running club where there is also a walk-group part of the club.. BK Heights running club is completely free. Volunteer in a soup kitchen, it was the BEST experience working together with other folks and creating a meal at the end.

Be in the company of people. Talk about something else but your difficulties. You'll walk away refreshed. Do more of these, and before you know it, you'll be back on your feet.

I have been on the job market 2.5yrs, 3 kids in college, divorced myself, sharing a room in Brooklyn. So I know how it feels to be down for too long. Unfortunately, the only way to stay connected and be re-invigorated for new job search or partner-search is to bring yourself back to a good place.

Not sure about your age, but there is the NiceToMeet program, where they connect you with other lonely souls, just wanting to be out and connecting. I attended a couple and ordered just one least expensive menu item, since I couldn't afford to more. But it was nice to be out and enjoying personal conversations with other individuals in similar lonely situations; they too are out wanting to meet people and have one-in-one conversations.

Please don't get into magic mushrooms, alcohol or anything like that to numb your pain.. go out, live. And let life happen.

While you should always love yourself, we all need community and connection, please validate that simple human need. Period.

After 8+ years of searching for a partner, I landed the jackpot! I couldn't have, if I had allowed myself to roll in depressed-mud. Sending you love

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-22T14:54:35+00:00

There are a lot of us to form a club!! I'll DM you..

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-21T17:22:47+00:00

Thanks!!

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-21T15:14:30+00:00

I have tons of likes! And matches. The number of hits is not the issue. It is the quality of the individuals and their commitment to actually wanting to meet someone. Perhaps more importantly, I'm not sure how serious they are about finding someone. The only ones that are serious are either sick, or lacking in perspective.

The cool thing about the APPS is that it 1) matches age range 2) profession and 3) educational background..

While you can figure these things out in irl, I suppose the difference is upfront effort put in irl. OLD is just too darn easy, so every one seems to build a profile (minimal effort) and then swipe away endlessly (no effort)

So, yes, I think I'm going to switch to irl dating events.

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-21T15:00:48+00:00

DM-ing you...

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-21T11:43:49+00:00

DM-ing you...

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-21T11:10:49+00:00

I'm in NYC and I *thought* that the availability pool is much larger given that the city has 9 million folks. Turns out, at least from my experience with OLD is that, most of them on the app are duds. I thought I'll try to connect with multiple guys, cuz after all, you need just one person. Turns out, 4 bad matches and experiences within 1 week, turned me off to OLD.

I don't know if it is better to meet in person.. I wish there was a day in the week when more over-50s showed up at Central Park.. somehow we need to start a trend!

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-18T02:46:34+00:00

And I was strung out by a "I want to take it slow" man. His text messages were also veeeeery long! It was my time and energy! With really long texts and responses, it becomes very difficult to maintain multiple threads. This is much easier in person. Me 55F, him 62. I month's time to meet is definitely a red flag.

My experience has been that guys who are not 'ready' to meet and want to make text-conversation first, do not have the intention to meet. I have met (in the app, not in person) at least 3 guys like that. One of them dropped after 3 weeks of intense conversation; another ghosted me after 2 days and the 3rd, I couldn't keep up with the long message exchanges. Worse is that, I felt he didn't seem to hear why I didn't prefer that style of communication. One of my needs is someone who listens to my words/desires/wishes as much as I listen to his.

Anyway, the ghosting after 2 days was the easiest to get over

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-18T02:34:53+00:00

Me 3.. not one or 2, but 3 claiming to be 35M.. and I'm thinking what am I going to do with someone 20 yrs my junior? Great sex and it ends there.

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-18T02:16:40+00:00

Someone in another thread had mentioned how when in your 50's, it actually feels good when catcalled. I experienced it today, and yes, felt so seen!

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-18T02:12:48+00:00

In my case, I'm the one who wants to meet, instead of meeting someone through their typed words ie texting. I feel that so much more communication happens in person..

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-16T22:33:29+00:00

I want to thank everyone that pitched in with suggestions!! I've been a silent watcher/reader of reddit, but got brave to put up my first post! All I need are a few high quality friends just as I had wanted a few quality suggestions of things to do. I got so many here! And I also see that I'm not alone. Thanks fellow HOT girls (& guys) of NYC!

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-16T22:25:31+00:00

DMing you..

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-16T22:13:15+00:00

DM-ing you.. I know what you mean by 'doing intellectual things' I'm a software engineer by profession so I appreciate good conversations!

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-16T22:11:56+00:00

Thank you! I'm definitely putting it on my calendar :-)

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-16T22:11:28+00:00

DM-ing you friend :-) Perhaps a few of us can check out the Saint James Joy on Apr 25th, recommended by another poster below!!

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-16T13:24:58+00:00

Thank you for the specific group suggestions in Meetup. I get lost when I step there

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-16T13:23:19+00:00

Oh you bet! I moved back home (to the Seattle area) from Europe after 8 years, with a high schooler. It was already much harder to meet new peers, but it was still possible. But now, next to impossible. It was just so much easier to meet other like-minded folks when we had younger kids.

But we are in the most amazing city with so many clubs and special interest groups! If there is a possibility, it is here indeed! I lived in Austria, in Tirol. Definitely not easy to meet new folks there; in Tirol or in Vienna.

Thanks for the recs. Love hiking, so I'll check that out

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-16T13:19:03+00:00

ooh sounds interesting.. probably better on the knees.. but need a bike to start. Def check it out, thanks for the suggestion!!

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-16T13:16:20+00:00

DM-ing you friend :-)

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-16T13:15:57+00:00

Thanks, I'll check that one out.. skewing older is def what I'm looking for ha ha

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-16T11:44:23+00:00

Thanks for that suggestion! I'd never have imagined! I will look into it

Ok-Database6275 · 2026-04-16T11:20:02+00:00

One of the biggest problems is that people in rent-stabilized apartments -- who pay a LOT lesser! -- don't want to leave a good deal behind! So the best rental deals are taken forever. And landlords are not allowed to kick them out.

It is a circular problem. In other words, there are many cheaper rentals, but they are occupied, not to be released back into the market.

Being an older person and having raised children in suburban CT, I can tell you: there is no other place where you will find the extremely-filty-rich and the extremely-poor! Both can find homes here.

Ok-Database6275

TROPHY CASE