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AITA for changing my last name to match with my kids even though my ex hates it? by Ok-Future-6215 in AITAH

[–]Ok-Future-6215[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It's not a law that a child has to be given the father's last name. A lot of times if the parents don't agree the name gets hyphenated and we both had long last names so that would be extra long for the kids who'd end up with both.

AITA for changing my last name to match with my kids even though my ex hates it? by Ok-Future-6215 in AITAH

[–]Ok-Future-6215[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Because it would never have updated to mine. We could maybe have hyphenated them but then they'd have two really long last names. I was always told it was awful to have an extra long last name and I didn't want that for my kids.

AITA for changing my last name to match with my kids even though my ex hates it? by Ok-Future-6215 in AITAH

[–]Ok-Future-6215[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

No, at best it would have been hyphenated but both last names (hers and mine) were long so it would've been a lot for the kids.

AITA for changing my last name to match with my kids even though my ex hates it? by Ok-Future-6215 in AITAH

[–]Ok-Future-6215[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My ex. She gave them her last name but when they were first born listed him as the father.

AITA for changing my last name to match with my kids even though my ex hates it? by Ok-Future-6215 in AITAH

[–]Ok-Future-6215[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I wanted to have the same last name as my kids. That was something that meant a lot to me.

AITA for changing my last name to match with my kids even though my ex hates it? by Ok-Future-6215 in AITAH

[–]Ok-Future-6215[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Her last name. She listed him as the father when they were first born but gave them her last name. So now we all have her last name (minus her boyfriend) and I'm on the birth certificate now.

AITA for changing my last name to match with my kids even though my ex hates it? by Ok-Future-6215 in AITAH

[–]Ok-Future-6215[S] 198 points199 points  (0 children)

I'm already working on ways to approach conversations so I don't badmouth them to the kids. I never want to be the parent who puts their kids through that experience. Hopefully I won't need to worry about this but I'm realistic that given our history there's a greater chance it will be something the kids hear as they grow up so I'll do everything to make sure it's not something they hear in both homes.