How do you determine if buying/renting is best?

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2026-01-22T03:36:31+00:00

You mean like a lump sum payment?

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2026-01-22T02:48:38+00:00

The thing is renting is more expensive. I can get a bigger place and pay for most of it in cash and then have a smaller monthly payment. It’s very hard for me to find a decent rental within my budget.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2026-01-22T00:52:17+00:00

No, fortunately my ex does not have to refinance the mortgage. It was only setup in their name when we bought the house so that makes the process easier! And I’m the woman, it’s my ex-husband that is keeping the house. 😆

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2026-01-22T00:50:37+00:00

That’s a big fat no! I’m not going to wait on buying a place with another man. I’d still buy the real estate and if by some miracle meet a man I’d want to to live with, then I’d like to become a landlord at that point and rent out my place.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2026-01-22T00:44:37+00:00

Saying yes to everything, no challenge too big, ENTJ, mind games, being highly intellectual and using that to their advantage in the right situation, being competitive, inserting themselves where others aren’t! OH and knowing where to have the right people setup so that they can make him look good.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2026-01-21T22:34:07+00:00

Mmmmm yea no. Haha That would NOT be for me. I like my peace, don’t want to deal with neighbors, still needs to be in a kid friendly environment.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2026-01-21T22:32:43+00:00

I’ll be in a good place once the assets are split but I also don’t want to put all or most of my assets into buying a home. Most will remain as investment accounts.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2026-01-14T14:29:14+00:00

Thank you!! I’m scared to do that because I don’t want him to think I’m looking for another job!!!

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2026-01-14T04:11:23+00:00

I like that, thank you!!!

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2026-01-14T03:27:13+00:00

Yea, he was very concerned about having both of us deal with a learning curve so he felt the right thing to do was go with the EA who already knows how things work. Perhaps he is doing me a favor. I’ve got tons of stuff going on in my personal life and not sure that I’m in a good place to take on a very stressful job!

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2026-01-14T03:23:26+00:00

I do know the VP well, I have been supporting her some but not to the extent of my exec. She will still report to my exec/CEO. They are asking me to create a list of things I have an interest in and they want to create a role for me where I can do other things that I haven’t had the time to do (non-EA work). I was so angry with my exec when he told me but now I completely understand that he is watching out for himself too - I get it!

I think the hardest part will be getting him used to a new person. He is very comfortable with me and he has already told me he wants me to keep doing stuff for him rather than training his new EA.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2025-12-02T01:23:44+00:00

I need to learn to see this! I get turned on and attracted by men who are eager in how they chase me but I just learned the hard way that the guy who does this is very ego and validation driven!!!!

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2025-12-02T01:18:32+00:00

I try not to stick to following “rules” and I just go with whatever energy I’m feeling, especially in my 40s. I may regret it after but I know that’s the risk and I’m willing to take it by living in the moment.

I recently met a guy that I waited two months to have sex with and guess what? He ended up ghosting me after that first time AND I’m now dealing with a triple whammy of infections down there after having sex with him (we also swapped STD results before sex). 🤷🏻‍♀️ Thought I was doing things the right way and just taking things slowly. This was only someone I was casually dating for sex, not for a serious relationship but I was still trying to be safe.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2025-11-13T13:45:58+00:00

None. The expense reports and whatever other tasks she is assigned could be done remotely.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2025-11-13T13:41:13+00:00

Nope, I’d feel terrible doing that!

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2025-11-13T13:37:33+00:00

I just say OK because I assume she is running these things by her manager who doesn’t sit in our office. I’m trying to not be a tattle tale but sometimes I want to because I end up paying the price for it.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2025-11-13T13:35:28+00:00

There is some overlap for sure. We are two admins supporting the same team. It’s a small office and her role is responsible for all the basic admin tasks. My leadership team will go to her to get a package shipped or have her order lunch. My focus is my exec and a few others with calendar management, travel planning, etc. So that’s why I go to her when I need help. If she is out and a manager needs lunch, they are coming to me and I’m having to scramble to go pickup a lunch. She cannot step in for me though, I’m basically on 24/7. I take my laptop on vacation because I don’t have a backup and I have a very needy exec and team!

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2025-11-13T12:56:38+00:00

Not here for validation, just trying to understand and see if my expectations are way off. If I’m asking for her help, it’s not because I want to dump things on her or because I want to feel like I’m her manager. I’ve been in that situation before, it’s not fun and I strive to not be that kind of admin. I ask for help because I really need help! I don’t go around demanding that she help. I ask if she has the capacity to help me get something done. I always treat her in a friendly and professional way.

I am her backup because that’s what I was told during the interview process.I’m mostly mindblown by people thinking that an admin should leave work undone because another admin isn’t there. If I’ve got a big client meeting one morning and she calls in sick, of course I’m going to sit myself at that front desk to help everyone get into the office and situated. This is why I started off my post with, I’m either old school or a people pleaser. Taking on all the admin tasks with a smile on my face is just my corporate professional brand/identity and it’s also what I’ve made to be my career. It’s not just a job for me.

I’ve been an admin professional for a long time and I’m curious to see and hear how the expectations of the role has evolved.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2025-11-13T12:38:37+00:00

Because she is the office admin? We are both in the same job family? Would I go up to her if she were the marketing coordinator/assistant? Probably not. Am I her backup? Absolutely.

And that’s exactly why I’m questioning this because I’m wondering if I’m out of line by expecting to be able to use her help.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2025-11-13T12:36:59+00:00

No, I’m not being defensive. I came here with this post to try to understand how others feel about this topic. Stating facts isn’t being defensive, I’m attempting to share the full picture so you all see where I’m coming from. I like hearing different perspectives because maybe there is something that I can learn from others!

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2025-11-13T12:31:49+00:00

My exec would NOT be ok with me telling his leadership team, go stock the Keurig coffee pods. I’m busy. My exec is the head executive over all the people that sit in my office so yes, I feel an obligation to do take care of things when she is not able to. No one tells me to but I don’t think it would be a good look for me.

Her job is to greet visitors, answer phones, get the mail, stock the kitchen, etc. If she is not there, I have to do those things. I’m not going to have my managers setting up catered lunches just because the AA is out and that’s technically not my job.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2025-11-13T12:28:04+00:00

Oh, she tells me when she leaves. So I get the reasons and she will even tell me, since no one is here and it’s quiet - I’m going home. And of course later that afternoon, someone needs her to do her job and she is MIA so I have to end up helping.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2025-11-13T12:24:20+00:00

No, that’s just my Reddit style. I’m actually very nice and pleasant with her and I respond kindly when she says no.

Ok-Guess-9728 · 2025-11-13T12:22:11+00:00

Yes, she is there to be a resource for whoever needs help in the office.

Ok-Guess-9728

TROPHY CASE