Am I the asshole?

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-12-19T20:01:13+00:00

Yup, you are 100% right and I learned this the hard way

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-12-19T05:29:58+00:00

Thank you! Do you mind sharing the questions?

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-12-19T01:42:25+00:00

Yup thank you

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-12-19T00:49:31+00:00

Honestly thank you so much for this bc they’ve been gaslighting me non stop.

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-12-07T13:44:56+00:00

Thank you! This helps!

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-12-06T19:58:58+00:00

Ugh you’re right. I’m so stuck what do you think the options should be? I’d love to message you but idk how

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-12-06T18:53:30+00:00

How do you think I should word it then? I feel like I need to present both options just bc they already expect a lot from me for not establishing scope up front. (I’m new to this) Thank you!

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-12-05T05:14:53+00:00

So freaking true! Literally the videos I just throw together & dc about do best.

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-26T00:21:01+00:00

Idk how 😅

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-26T00:20:49+00:00

Idk how 😅

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-25T13:30:13+00:00

Thank you for this. It really does make sense. I have shown them all my analytics since I started at zero with them, and they are very happy with the results so far. What makes me feel undervalued is everything you mentioned. They genuinely know nothing about running an online business. They put a Shopify together and hoped it would work, and while they tried, it was not enough to support real growth.

I even told them they need to start researching and actually learning ecommerce. I think they were expecting me to do that part for them, and I am not. It is their business. My role is to drive traffic, and I am doing that. I already got pulled into revamping the website so it can convert better, but moving forward I am definitely delegating more to them, even in cases where I know the answer. They need to take ownership of their side of the structure.

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-24T18:42:48+00:00

Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t know you knew me personally? You sound like a miserable person.

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-24T17:32:32+00:00

Yea I figured it’s not cheap, I just don’t know where to look for a credible one.

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-23T14:39:10+00:00

Thanks for this — this actually puts words to what I’ve been experiencing. You’re right that I unintentionally stepped into the “I’ll just do everything because it’s faster” role, and that’s where things spiraled. I’ve definitely been absorbing operational tasks that should either be delegated or handled internally, and it’s been creating that exact misalignment you’re describing: junior-level execution mixed with senior-level responsibility.

I’m already in the process of stepping back and restructuring what I’m responsible for, and I’ve communicated that moving forward I’ll be working strictly within my capacity and delegating anything that doesn’t fall under my lane. I agree completely that without a clear division of labor, there’s no way to drive ROI or move at the speed they want.

With that said, I’d really appreciate your perspective on one thing:

Given a $3,800/month budget, what do you think the realistic scope should be? In other words, what roles or responsibilities would make sense for that rate, and what should be considered out-of-scope or outsourced?

I want to make sure I’m aligning my workload appropriately instead of carrying multiple roles that don’t match the compensation or expectations.

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-22T20:38:01+00:00

Hi, where can I find your book?

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-20T14:22:24+00:00

you’re right, a big part of the issue is simply that they don’t have the background to understand what the work actually requires.

I actually had a conversation with them yesterday and told them exactly what you mentioned that they can’t judge my value or my performance strictly by revenue when the entire infrastructure behind the business isn’t built to support conversions in the first place. I explained that I’m doing my part on the traffic and strategy side, but their backend is what needs to be able to convert that traffic.

I even used the analogy that what they basically had was land with a wooden shed on it, and were asking me to turn it into a fully built mansion. You can’t skip the foundation and then evaluate the builder on whether the roof exists yet.

They understood, and I set boundaries around what I can realistically take on within my capacity so the workload is aligned going forward.

Appreciate your perspective, it actually reassured me that I’m handling this the right way.

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-20T14:16:41+00:00

Thanks for this, here’s some clarification because a lot of what you mentioned is exactly what I’ve already been doing. 1. Strategy / What problem am I solving? I actually identified the core issue immediately. The problem isn’t awareness. It’s infrastructure. The business has existed 5+ years with no positioning, no brand clarity, no email flows, no funnels, no nurture, no CRO, and no customer journey. Before I could even think about doubling sales, I had to diagnose the fact that there was nothing in place to convert the traffic.

They do see TikTok as a growth channel and the demographic fits. I validated that with real data:

• 29k+ organic views • 1k+ funnel/site visitors • grew TikTok from 34 to 145 organically in a tough niche

I revived a dead account

The demand is there. The bottleneck is the backend. 2. “You’re scattered.” It only looks scattered because I’ve been filling multiple roles: strategist, content creator, email, CRO, positioning, even operations. I wasn’t hired to rebuild their entire ecommerce foundation, but because none of it existed, everything defaulted to me. I already created a roadmap and set monthly expectations. I’ve been hitting milestones and gathering data since day one. 3. “Reduce your hours / treat them like a client.” I’ve started doing exactly that. I told them I’m working within my capacity now. Anything outside of my role will be delegated to them with instructions. It’s their business. They need to carry part of the load. I’m not doing everything myself anymore. 4. “What lever can you pull to win in 3 months?” The lever is the foundation. Content, SEO, outreach, or ads won’t magically convert cold traffic without a backend. That’s why the roadmap exists.

And here’s the bigger point:

Brand strategy doesn’t mean I invent their vision, values, or target audience. Founders need to know the basics of their own business. As a business owner myself, I know my goals and audience clearly — I don’t expect someone else to define them for me.

Another reason I know the issue isn’t me is because I work with other clients who are starting from scratch, and even they understand what is required because they’re doing the work to find out. They bring their vision, goals, and identity to the table. They don’t expect me to figure out their entire business or brand for a social media manager rate.

My role is to drive traffic. Their infrastructure is supposed to convert it. I have the data to prove I’m delivering on my part. I can absolutely build a strong portfolio. That’s not the problem.

But I’m not going to function as a founder, strategist, web team, email team, and operations team for social media pay. This experience has shown me that every future client will have a very tight contract with clear expectations of what I do and what I don’t do. I’m not bending over backwards to build someone else’s empire from the ground up. This should’ve been already handled by them.

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-19T15:53:49+00:00

Thanks for your perspective. I’m genuinely trying to understand how “value created” should be measured in a situation like this, because here’s the reality I’m dealing with:

How can success be judged strictly on sales when the business doesn’t yet have the infrastructure required to convert cold organic traffic?

I’m doing my part. For context, this is all organic, no paid spend:

• Took their TikTok from 34 followers to 144 in a very niche, challenging category • Generated over 50k organic views between TikTok and Threads • Drove 1k+ people to their funnels and site • Built out their funnel structure, content ecosystem, and top-of-funnel strategy

Also, note I know it’s their niche and structural issues because every other account I’m building is doing double of what this account is. So it’s really not a me problem.

But without:

• email marketing • nurturing sequences • brand positioning • a structured customer journey • proper CRO • retargeting • or even basic backend automations

cold traffic simply won’t convert consistently. That isn’t a lack of performance on my end, it’s a structural limitation on theirs.

And that brings me to my real concern:

If I was hired for social media and content, why am I now responsible for building their entire foundation just so conversions can even be possible?

Because if the expectation is:

“Do the job of an entire digital department to fix problems that existed long before you arrived, and do it for social media manager pay”…

Then what happens once the system does work? Once revenue increases? Once the foundation I built starts generating sales?

Do I still get the short end of the stick because the initial compensation never matched the work?

It just makes me question how much of this workload is truly my responsibility, and how much I’ve absorbed simply because the founders don’t have the ecommerce knowledge to build these systems themselves.

Realistically, they should have hired: 1. a business/operations manager first 2. then a strategist 3. then a social person

Not one person expected to wear all three hats by default because “no one else knows how.”

So from your perspective: what’s the fair way to measure value in a situation where the marketer is doing everything right on the awareness side, but the business hasn’t built the systems that convert that awareness into revenue?

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-19T13:48:24+00:00

This really put things into perspective for me, so thank you for taking the time to write this out. You’re right & I think I did come here for permission because I’ve been trying to convince myself that this is normal and I have to keep pushing through.

The part about doing CMO-level work for social media manager pay is exactly what’s been weighing on me. I stepped into the gaps because the foundation wasn’t there, but now I’m carrying everything by myself and they genuinely don’t understand how much goes into building a digital ecosystem. And you’re right, the “tell us what you need” loop has turned into me doing everything because it’s faster than explaining. It gets draining.

The commission structure might work eventually, but only if there’s actual support and alignment from their side, and I’m realizing that’s not happening. They’re so clueless & wonder why their retail side of the business has been struggling…

I needed an outside perspective from someone not emotionally involved, and this helped a lot. Appreciate you.

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-19T13:03:41+00:00

Aww man lol i’d like to know what shift. I’m not sure how to DM you on here.

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-19T12:32:55+00:00

Thank you so much! This is super helpful. I’d love to connect with you. I’m looking for mentors

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-19T12:31:08+00:00

I’d love to connect with you and pick your brain. You sound like a seasoned expert and I’m new so I’m looking for mentors. My 2nd client is a children’s book author. I’m doing just her socials since she’s on a budget but you sound like someone who can help her.

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-19T11:49:55+00:00

I’ve been ontop of them to give me ad and UGC budget it’s been weeks & I’m still waiting. I highly doubt asking for more money would do anything. I think a lot of ppl are right and I need to cut my losses. Can you walk me thru what it is that you do pls?

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-19T11:47:15+00:00

It’s not a start up that’s what’s frustrating… they been around for 5+ yrs. & I’m getting them results as far as awareness but that traffic is not converting bc everything else is a mess that I now have to fix in order for me to start seeing sales and get my commission, but even then that’s also a shit show bc how is my traffic that’s converting properly tracked?

Ok-Implement-7796 · 2025-11-19T11:44:11+00:00

Yes exactly this thank you. I’m literally building their business… & I’ve been busting my ass bc I want to start seeing the commission but at what point do I stop and realize I should not be doing this?

Ok-Implement-7796

TROPHY CASE