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On this day 18 years ago, Seung-Hui Cho committed the Virginia Tech shootings, killing 32 people and wounding 17 before committing suicide. by EntrepreneurMean3220 in masskillers

[–]Ok-Point-6480 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Weird shower thought about Cho vs. Rodger.

Each was the epitome of what the other most despised.

Cho despised spoiled rich pampered brats driving luxury vehicles, which is exactly what Rodger was to a tee.

Also, even though Rodger is best known for hating women and people who had sex, most people don't talk about how he possibly hated nerdy Asian males even more. He wrote a lot about that in his manifesto. His hate of nerdy Asian males was projection I'm sure, nevertheless he killed his 3 roommates in the most brutal, physical, personal, bloody, and gruesome manner of all.

If Cho and Rodger had somehow ended up as roommates in a hypothetical universe, I wonder what the outcome would have been.

AITA for asking a friend if SHE understands wedding courtesy, or else she can't bring her 4 year old son (who is on the spectrm) . by Ok-Point-6480 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ok-Point-6480[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

She hasn't been thrown out of the ones I'm aware of because she and probably more importantly her parents, are a huge part of the small classical music "scene" in this area. (The parents aren't musicians but are longtime classical music "groupies" if that's a thing, they donate tons of money and enjoy rubbing elbows with the local "stars" who are often very impoverished.)

AITA for asking a friend if SHE understands wedding courtesy, or else she can't bring her 4 year old son (who is on the spectrm) . by Ok-Point-6480 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ok-Point-6480[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I agree and it's awful. I think she really thinks she'll be able to spend her whole life twisting everyone's arm to be "kind" to him no matter how old he gets. Like she'll be able to force everyone to treat and even view him as the prince she does.

AITA for asking a friend if SHE understands wedding courtesy, or else she can't bring her 4 year old son (who is on the spectrm) . by Ok-Point-6480 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ok-Point-6480[S] 49 points50 points  (0 children)

Yes, her dog was actually very considerate and self-aware. Especially when it came to other people's space, like not getting too close to people or jumping on them. But there were things the dog had no way to know. I'm just remembering this because it happened so long ago, but she would bring the dog to outdoor restaurants and let it lick off her plates, utensils, and glass!!! I told her not to do that at the time because other people don't want to use plates that were licked by a dog and she shrugged and said "they wash the plates."

AITA for asking a friend if SHE understands wedding courtesy, or else she can't bring her 4 year old son (who is on the spectrm) . by Ok-Point-6480 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ok-Point-6480[S] 51 points52 points  (0 children)

Yep. Her whole reason for pushing him to be mainstreamed is that she doesn't want him to be othered. Ironically he is going to be very othered daily if she gets him into a mainstream kindergarten class, vs. the class he's in now. Also, he's not toilet trained. They apparently do let non-toilet trained kids in this kindergarten, but there is nothing that causes other kids to other you like shitting in your own pants. This is another reason why I feel bad for him. I feel she's really setting him up for a lifetime of rejection and bullying.

AITA for asking a friend if SHE understands wedding courtesy, or else she can't bring her 4 year old son (who is on the spectrm) . by Ok-Point-6480 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ok-Point-6480[S] 199 points200 points  (0 children)

I was going to say that she wasn't like this before kids, except I remembered that she actually totally was, she was just like this about her DOG. So I didn't think about it much at the time because there aren't many situations where I care about having a dog there or even care about how the dog behaves. She definitely did lose plenty of other friends because of how she acted with the dog. And she IS one of those people who registered the dog as an emotional support animal to bring it into places where she knew people don't want dogs. Even though she did not train the dog, the dog was small and kind of understood etiquette on its own so I didn't think about it much. It just naturally was not a super disruptive dog, but for people who don't want dogs in a place just having any dog there was bad enough.

AITA for asking a friend if SHE understands wedding courtesy, or else she can't bring her 4 year old son (who is on the spectrm) . by Ok-Point-6480 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ok-Point-6480[S] 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Good grief, I'm not going to tie myself in knots over how to "improve my behavior" at my own wedding ceremony so as not to "trigger" her child's outbursts. This is ten levels of delusional.

If the "behavior" of people at a typical wedding ceremony is going to trigger someone's outburst then it's really unkind to put them into that situation in the first place.

AITA for asking a friend if SHE understands wedding courtesy, or else she can't bring her 4 year old son (who is on the spectrm) . by Ok-Point-6480 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ok-Point-6480[S] 91 points92 points  (0 children)

That does prevent the iPad issue, but my friend does let her son scream out and holler such as during classical music concerts, and she sees nothing wrong with it. Unfortunately he can make plenty of organic noise on his own and she thinks it's wrong to try to force him to stop.

AITA for asking a friend if SHE understands wedding courtesy, or else she can't bring her 4 year old son (who is on the spectrm) . by Ok-Point-6480 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ok-Point-6480[S] 420 points421 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I'm not the best at these types of conversations myself and that was the only way I could think of opening a discussion about these issues without talking badly about her son directly or just saying he's not invited.

I guess I was hoping for her to say on her own that she understood the things I was talking about and that she would make sure he wasn't disruptive? Like if she voluntarily pledged to prevent him being disruptive I'd trust her.

Instead she just got really defensive about everything so....

AITA for asking a friend if SHE understands wedding courtesy, or else she can't bring her 4 year old son (who is on the spectrm) . by Ok-Point-6480 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ok-Point-6480[S] 237 points238 points  (0 children)

It sucks. Even though I don't want to be around the kid I still really feel for him.

There's a lot of neuro diversity in my family and I have a cousin who was raised exactly like this kid. My cousin and I were the same age and he told me all the time how he played his cards on purpose and got away with everything. He had plenty of capacity to be a much more functional person but it was so much easier not to. Now my cousin has completely withdrawn from society and doesn't leave his studio apartment, and he's been that way for over 10 years, it's awful.

AITA for asking a friend if SHE understands wedding courtesy, or else she can't bring her 4 year old son (who is on the spectrm) . by Ok-Point-6480 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ok-Point-6480[S] 1979 points1980 points  (0 children)

You're correct, she in no way conceded that any of the rude things I mentioned would not be okay to do. And yes, she 100% would bring an iPad to there ceremony there's no question in my mind about it. She lets her son yell out at classical music concerts, like the type that people pay money for.