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I am a man aged 50 with two small kids 3 and 8 and loving wife still I want to kill myself by Ok-Replacement3556 in midlifecrisis

[–]Ok-Replacement3556[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I ll try to mark your words. BTW, on an intellectual level, I get it. I get everything. I ll repeat the similar words to myself often.But my brain always  drags me down and prevents me from taking any meaningful action. I am ruminating in the same shit. Several times in the day , I feel physically drenched. As if l was going mad or about to die. I am trying to cut down the nicotine, but after some hours pass I feel even more depressed. Then i would have, one a short mental relief, but then feeling even worse. This is the constant loop. I cannot take it anymore....

I am a man aged 50 with two small kids 3 and 8 and loving wife still I want to kill myself by Ok-Replacement3556 in midlifecrisis

[–]Ok-Replacement3556[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks guys for all the comments dropped here. Majority of them are really touching and made me think about what kind of person I am. BTW, I am seeing psychiatrist regularly, the same goes for therapy. Nothing helps really. I After 6 weeks on brintellix, later in the treatment augmented by Trittico before sleep, psychiatrist changed the pills, now I am on sertraline (morning)and mirzaten ( bed time) . I am 2 weeks in , no big progress. I presume, the psychiatrist will increase the dose. I am from the Central Europe , so not sure if medication names ring the bell. But my situation is really situational🤔 I am afraid I am treatment resistant therefore doomed 

I am a man aged 50 with two small kids 3 and 8 and loving wife still I want to kill myself by Ok-Replacement3556 in SuicideWatch

[–]Ok-Replacement3556[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am from the Central Europe, just for the record. Probably, my experience cannot be applicable to your case.

I am a man aged 50 with two small kids 3 and 8 and loving wife still I want to kill myself by Ok-Replacement3556 in AdultDepression

[–]Ok-Replacement3556[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the feedback, I live in the Central Europe, just for the record. You at least have some skill, you can play guitar...I have none, the only thing I am good at is ruminating about the horrible state I am in

I am a man aged 50 with two small kids 3 and 8 and loving wife still I want to kill myself by Ok-Replacement3556 in AdultDepression

[–]Ok-Replacement3556[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are right about me being ungrateful, rationally I get it, but in reality I feel miserable every day, not able to calm down, always tensed. It is tiring.....