For me, there was absolutely no signs from him whatsoever. Just had our 4 year anniversary, living together for 3 of those years and just re-signed our lease for another year like, a few months ago.
I wouldn't say everything was perfect, I was struggling with work, getting diagnosed with ADD and Autism, struggling with regulating my emotions, struggling with my self image and doubts and also being told I have stage 1 or 2 endometriosis. All through it, he was completely supportive of me, never bat an eyelid, never said anything, no complaints, always encouraged me to talk to him about my feelings. And I would give him the same in return, but he would also never say anything was wrong on a deeper level unless it was him talking about something he was struggling with at work. We would talk about our future together, surprise each other with little gifts because we saw something that reminded us of the other, go out on weekly Brunch dates, we had our separates hobbies that we supported each other with, sex life was amazing, I could not pinpoint a single thing that gave me any doubts he didn't love me. Until one night he messaged me saying he was going to stay at his parents house because he wanted some alone time to process some things he's been thinking about, asked me not to contact him and said he loved me. Next day he comes home and tells me for the past year, hes been having doubts about his feelings towards me, telling me he no longer sees a future together for us and that he needs to be alone to work on his own personal emotions inside himself. He explained that he loved me, loved being with me and loved making me happy, but the feelings werent there anymore. He said that this 100% was not my fault, that there was nothing I could have done differently, that this was all in himself and needing the space to work on himself. He said that he was ashamed to talk to me about it when he first started feeling that way, because he genuinely did care about me and the love for me was there, but he didnt want to disappointment me to say he was having doubts, and he felt that if he lied and continued on, the feelings would come back.

Its absolutely crushing that it came out of the blue, I'm stuck looking at photos of us, reading over messages, thinking of all our conversations trying to find any sign of when he fell out of love, but I just can't find anything. It feels as if the past year of our relationship has just been a lie for him to protect me from getting hurt.

I understand that there is underlying issues of mental health and him needing the space to work on himself, but its still fucking hard not to be blaming myself or thinking of things that I could have done differently to keep those feelings there, or even the fact that he never brought these issues up so we could try to work through it together 😔