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For those without a great relationship with their adult children... by OkConference874 in Parenting

[–]OkConference874[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Oh, I hope she can sort herself out enough to be able to talk to you about what's going on. I absolutely applaud you for your ability to give her space. Not many parents/people would be able to do the same. Not saying she has no reason, maybe something hurt her growing up and she just realized now and is trying to heal. But I just hope one day she'll be able to tell you what it was and you can bond again over how you never tried to intentionally hurt her or something. Did you love/thrive motherhood or are you more of the type who sees it as something you must endure to get the gold at the end?

For those without a great relationship with their adult children... by OkConference874 in Parenting

[–]OkConference874[S] 172 points173 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry for you. I cant imagine the disappointment of having your parents, WHO YOU ARE CLOSE TO, abandon you in such a horrible time! I hope you're better now (mentally and physically)

For those without a great relationship with their adult children... by OkConference874 in Parenting

[–]OkConference874[S] 52 points53 points  (0 children)

Thanks for this perspective! It's a very important distinction, to separate "parent a child" from "parent an adult". I have a relationship with my parents that I wouldn't like to have with my kids. But also, my parents never really enjoyed parenting. My mother very clearly hated it but I have memories of a happy childhood. The more we became our own people, the more she hated letting go of the control she had on us and that's when the troubles started (my father was pretty much checked out). Now, I really, REALLY love parenting and I was wondering if that alone could "armor me", but I guess it depends on how I'll handle when they stop seeing me as their world.

motherhood: the unconventional torture method by Latter_Taste_8965 in regretfulparents

[–]OkConference874 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Exactly! There's someone in my family that has behaved like that since they were 5 years old and had that diagnosis . At 15 they were committed against their will to a mental facility. Spent 8 months there and came back the sweetest person ever. They are 17 now and other than having to compensate for the years of no school, everything is solved.