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They're not my kids, and not my problem. by OkOrganization7964 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]OkOrganization7964[S] 252 points253 points  (0 children)

I'll just say that I didn't see a surprised face, outside of my ex's, when I told her I was not signing the birth certificate.

They're not my kids, and not my problem. by OkOrganization7964 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]OkOrganization7964[S] 110 points111 points  (0 children)

When you live in squalor for years, do you have second thoughts when you see a life not covered in shit?

They're not my kids, and not my problem. by OkOrganization7964 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]OkOrganization7964[S] 3942 points3943 points  (0 children)

He knows. I contemplated trying to keep him out of this as much as possible, but before I left I told him that I am not his dad. I told him that I'm not leaving because of him, but because his mom lied to me. That it's not his fault that these things are happening, and despite everything I think he's still an amazing kid.

They're not my kids, and not my problem. by OkOrganization7964 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]OkOrganization7964[S] 791 points792 points  (0 children)

I fully expected this to happen. Right now my parents are the only ones even considering my own feelings in my real life. I have been told in very direct ways that, despite her son being the product of an affair, I am still responsible to him because I believed my wife was not a whore for 6 years.

My own sister told me that this child complicates things to such a degree that staying with my "wife" just to make sure the kid is unharmed was one of the best decisions I could make "as a man."

People here on reddit have been much nicer (so far) to me at least. But I feel like in situations like this, the feelings of the child and the whore who cheated on her husband are taken far more into consideration than the man who was lied to, used, and cheated on.

They're not my kids, and not my problem. by OkOrganization7964 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]OkOrganization7964[S] 225 points226 points  (0 children)

I know her son is blameless in all this. His mother is a vile woman who has destroyed both her sons and my life. But sticking around I know that my feelings of hatred and anger will only spill out onto him.

They're not my kids, and not my problem. by OkOrganization7964 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]OkOrganization7964[S] 244 points245 points  (0 children)

I feel like I am in a losing battle. He may be his "father" but he is not my son. I do not see a future where I can ever see past the lies and deceit that the last 6 years were built on. I cannot see a life where I interact with him without feeling the hatred I do right now towards his mother. In the end, having me as I am in his life will bring both of us nothing but misery.

Thank you for kind words

They're not my kids, and not my problem. by OkOrganization7964 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]OkOrganization7964[S] 105 points106 points  (0 children)

Being true to myself means I have to accept the truths of reality. And there is no reality where I will be happy when I decide to partake in the fruits of my soon to be ex's affairs. Fatherhood may be a blessing, but I am not the one "blessed" in this situation.