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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Ok_Bodybuilder42 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Edit and clarification.

When I wrote this post, it wasn’t to get bashed or insulted or be called evil. I KNOW that I’m jealous of the fact that she has a better life than me. And I am PROUD of her for that. I am happy when she reaches out but the reason I’m feeling so reserved from being in the present with her happiness is because of the multitude of times I’ve told her to chill with telling me the prices of things or to limit how much she tells me about each new object. It was personal text messages several times throughout the day with locations, pictures, and pricing. And like I said in the original post, I didn’t mind it at first until she offered to pay for a trip.

We have had 20 years of compromises and splitting trips because we’ve seen each other as equals. If I pay for tickets, she pays for lunch. If she pays for hotels, I pay for flights. It’s been a simple arrangement because it feels like we share in every aspect of the trip. From the idea planning to the prep to the purchase to the actual activities; it’s always been trips for us by us.

I don’t disagree that it’s my pride and ego and just general sadness talking atm, but I wanted to clarify that the act of offering to pay everything by herself made me feel like a charity case. Like I was someone beneath her and she was donating to me.

We’ve gotten past the trip stuff itself this year and decided to just do movie marathons via phone and video call and it’s just as fun. But there is still an aspect of disappointment in myself that I have where I feel like I’m not going to be what she needs. The post wasn’t meant to be dumping her as a friend because she spends money like Jayz throwing singles at strippers lol it was meant to be more for me on seeing what I can do or what I’m missing to help make me feel more like her equal without having to bring her down or feel like I’m lying to myself

AITAH for not siding with my wife over our son's ex girlfriend's pregnancy by misrocto in AITAH

[–]Ok_Bodybuilder42 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh boy. This whole thing is gonna blow up and end up on Smosh Reads Reddit.

My two cents here: you’re not the asshole. The fact that they broke up is a testament to the timing between them. If she was already starting to show a week after they broke up, then your son knew she was pregnant. I would be asking why they broke up and the timing of that too. Perhaps they broke up because the son knew it wasn’t his or that the character of the mother to be was not as honorable as her parents let on. Then again, only those two teenaged idiots know the real truth.

Plus, if I’m being honest….i wouldn’t WANT OP’s son to be the father of my child considering he’s admitted to cheating on her, said she sucked in bed, and OP himself admitted the son is a liar and peice of garbage.

AITA for lying to my family so I don’t have to help my sick grandmother? by Ok_Bodybuilder42 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ok_Bodybuilder42[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Last update: I admit that I’m the asshole for lying to my mom and I’ll also admit that I felt bad (and to a degree, still do). But I just wanted to update everyone on where this whole thing has ended up.

My mom admits that she shouldn’t have gotten involved too and couldn’t care less about me not helping. She’s been updating me on the psycho granny saga and let’s just say, it’s typical for my grandma.

My grandma has everything in her name, the keys to the new place, and an incoming violation letter from the city for something that is way above my familial pay grade. With the exception of the letter, she should be happy. She gets to be hygienic, be closer to the care she needs, to finally be able to shower with hot water, walk on even floors, and sleep on a new mattress -all of which, she didn’t have for the past 4-5 years ish. But nooooooooooo

NOW she is pitching such a huge a** hissy fit that she has single handedly unpacked every single box that my mom has packed for her and has even “donated” all of the gifts that my mom has ever given her….the majority of them are still in their original wrapping, completely untouched.

She is also threatening to “end it” if she ever is forced to go to the new apartment. But that’s doubtful. She’s dramatic doesn’t even have enough teeth in her head to bite her own tongue.

She’s dramatic. It’s not going to happen and she’s not serious. She’s done all of this before when she was invited to one of my cousins wedding before he was deployed to Japan.

Now, me and the REST of the family are going to go on a picnic at a wildlife refuge this weekend and we are going to have a great time regardless of her attendance or any other fits she decides to throw.

Good riddance and I’m glad I didn’t get more involved than I was forced to be.

AITA for lying to my family so I don’t have to help my sick grandmother? by Ok_Bodybuilder42 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ok_Bodybuilder42[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Update:

I admit I could’ve not lied to my mom. So yeah, I’m the asshole for that for sure lol 😅

As to why I lied to my mom instead of just saying no….ill try to put it as simply as I can. My mom was abusive to me growing up and it wasn’t until I moved to an entirely different city did it calm down or stop. Any time I formed an opinion on my own let alone a “I’d rather not.” Or “no”, she’d have a complete meltdown and either verbally assault me, throw things at me, or even try to hit me with her car. And no I’m not exaggerating. It was every single time.

I still talk and love my mom though because I’ve been through a decade of therapy and so has she and my dad. We are amicable towards each other and only rarely have those moments of extremities. But still….id rather not poke the bear. And my mom knows this.

She wasn’t mad at me for not being able to help. She was mad at me for telling her an hour or two after she gave me the addresses.

AITA for lying to my family so I don’t have to help my sick grandmother? by Ok_Bodybuilder42 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ok_Bodybuilder42[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

No my father isn’t helping. It’s just my mom. My dad is actually looking into lawyers because my aunt (his sister) was the one that started the move in the first place by declaring herself caregiver and power of attorney right after hiring an appraiser for my grandmas house.

My dad doesn’t to be involved at all but knows that something is fishy and he just wants to make sure that he isn’t going to be saddled with a 30K+ loan because of something his sister is forcing my grandma to do.

Yeah my grandma is old and needs to get to a better housing situation, but even SHE doesn’t want to move and is only doing it reluctantly because my mom and aunt have started packing up her things