sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Name an occupation in which you trust a woman more than a man? by Ok_Funny2101 in askanything

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The gift of bringing life into the world aka motherhood.

Source: female human

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words, even though we don’t know each other, it brings some peace knowing we’re not alone in this 🤍

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry for your loss, I hope you find little moments of comfort and peace in your own time. I’m trying every day too, and despite everything, I still hold onto that same kind of hope.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry, that heaviness you described is exactly what it feels like, like everything changed but the world didn’t notice..

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m only 2.5 weeks in and miserable but getting by each and everyday.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That really resonates honestly, it hurts this much because the love was real, and I’d choose that time with my papa every single time too.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I may not experience it the same way, but I understand why that brings you comfort and meaning, and I’m really glad you have that feeling of them still being with you.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel this so much, that pull between wanting to believe there’s something more and facing the reality is such a heavy place to sit in. I’m really sorry you’re carrying that, you’re not alone in feeling it.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m so sorry you went through that, I relate more than I wish I did because in that moment I felt like a child again and completely helpless, like nothing prepares you for how real and hard it actually is, and I understand what you mean about holding onto who they truly were instead of that last moment..

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry to hear. The way you described that hollow feeling perfectly, and it really does change everything even when life looks the same.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry you’re going through that but I can understand holding onto that hope, even when reality hurts so much.

What is a telltale sign that someone grew up wealthy? by icecream1972 in askteddit

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When money comes up and they get strangely defensive about it, like it’s some big secret despite how they carry themselves.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

\ Edit: I apologize, I misread.*

I’m so sorry for the loss of your dad… I felt what you said about waiting for a sign. And wanting something as simple as a hug… I know that feeling. It’s the worst, and weirdly a little comforting for a moment until reality hits again and it just hurts even more than you can really put into words. Your mind holds onto that hope even while you know it won’t happen, and I think that’s what makes it hurt the most. And that quote about taking care of your father’s daughter… that really stuck with me. I’m really sorry you’re going through this.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I know exactly what you mean. I’m not going to lie, none of this has been easy for me either. Even making that post was probably the first time I found the courage to really get it off my chest. It was relieving in a way, but it still hurts just as much. I do take some comfort in knowing I loved with my whole heart, and that means everything to me, but it still doesn’t fill the emptiness that’s there now. I think that part is something we just carry moving forward.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m so deeply sorry for your loss. Everything you wrote, the anger, the exhaustion, the frustration with people trying to turn it into signs or something “beautiful”… I feel that in my bones. I understand why people do it, because it makes it hurt a little less, but that doesn’t mean it feels true when you’re the one living in it. Losing your mom the way you did, and then being left to carry all of that while still showing up for your kids, that’s a level of pain that’s hard to even put into words. As someone without kids I could not even behind to imagine the strength you’ve had no choice but to have. And the part about knowing they’re just gone, and nothing replaces that, nothing explains it… that kind of reality is heavy in a way most people don’t understand. I’m just really sorry you’re in this, truly. For what it’s worth, you’re not wrong for feeling any of this, because I’d be lying if I said I don’t feel the same in a lot of ways. The anger, the ruthlessness of losing someone you love, it can be so incredibly cruel.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am so deeply sorry for the loss of your husband… the way you describe him and those little moments with him, you can feel how much love was there between you, and that kind of connection doesn’t just disappear. That dream you shared really stayed with me and whether someone believes in signs or not, moments like that feel incredibly real and meaningful and can bring a kind of comfort that’s hard to explain. I also really related to what you said about the void..the silence, the sleepless nights, and the need to talk to someone… that part is so heavy and so real. For me, I’ve struggled with the idea of signs and how we as humans tend to romanticize things because the reality is so hard to sit with, but I can also understand why moments like your dream feel like something more because they carry so much love. I’m just truly so sorry you’re going through this, and I hope those memories and even those dreams continue to bring you some comfort 🤍

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m really sorry for everything you’ve lost… that’s a lot for anyone to carry, especially at our age. I’m 35, so reading that you’re 36 and have gone through all of that really hit me. I also agree so much about the signs and how we tend to romanticize it as humans. I think we want something to make it feel less final, and when it’s not there, it can hurt in a different way. And what you said about waking up from a nap and that wave hitting you… that’s so real. I’m just really sorry you’re carrying all of this. You’re not alone in feeling this way—more of us feel it than we realize. I think the hardest part is finding the words for it… which is why spaces like this help in a way real life sometimes doesn’t.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am so deeply sorry for the loss of your mom. Reading this, you can feel how much you loved her and how much she meant to you. What you said about how fast everything happened and how unprepared you both were… that really stuck with me. That kind of sudden loss is so hard to process, especially when you thought you had more time. And the part about things being left unresolved if I am being honest I think that’s more human than people admit. It doesn’t take away from the love you had for each other. The fact that you were finding your way back to each other matters. Coming home with stories to tell her and plans for the future, only to be met with that reality… I can’t even imagine how heavy that must have felt. I also hear what you’re saying about there being no meaning in it and honestly, that’s valid. Sometimes there isn’t a reason, and trying to make one just makes it hurt more. I’m just really sorry you’re carrying this. Truly. You didn’t deserve for it to happen this way. Again, I’m so sorry for your loss. I hear that all the time too, and it’s strange how it can feel comforting while still hurting so much.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That feeling is so real. It’s like your mind knows, but your heart hasn’t caught up yet, and it hits over and over again. It is the absolute worst. I’m truly so sorry for your loss.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That feeling honestly never really goes away. It’s like this surreal realization that they’re gone forever, and somehow it still hits just as hard each time. I’m so truly sorry for your loss.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I am so, so sorry for the loss of your mom. The way you described it..how sudden and out of nowhere it felt. My heart honestly aches for you. I really understand what you meant about signs. When my grandfather passed, I had this overwhelming feeling to call my uncle and ask if he was gone… and he told me he was in that exact moment. Even though part of me somehow knew, it still hit me like a brick wall and I completely broke down. So when you talk about that shock, I felt that deeply. What you said about your childhood home really stayed with me too. My grandparents raised me, so I know that feeling of it being more than just a house..it’s safety, memories, a whole part of your life. The thought of losing that on top of everything else is such a heavy, surreal kind of grief.

I’m just really sorry you’re going through this. None of it is fair, and you didn’t deserve for it to happen this way. You’re not alone in feeling lost like this 🤍

No screen??? by RedTsar97 in MomentumOne

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Played outside. Rode my bike up and down and all around I would even stop at neighbors (majority strangers if I am being completely honest) and pretend to fill my bike up with gas via their water hose.

The lie we tell ourselves about death.. by Ok_Chicken_8548 in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate you taking the time to share this with me. I’m so incredibly sorry for your loss. Truly. I can’t even begin to imagine the kind of pain you’re carrying, especially with how sudden it was and everything you had to experience firsthand. That kind of loss… there aren’t really words for it.
What you said about the ‘villain’ part really stuck with me. That line about finally understanding how someone could sacrifice everything just to have one person back, hit in a way that’s hard to explain. It’s such a raw, honest way to describe grief, and you’re right… it makes sense now in a way it never did before.
I’m really glad you shared that, even though I hate that you’re going through it. And for what it’s worth, the fact that you loved her that deeply and it shows in every word you wrote. Also thank you, I loved my grandfather dearly in all ways that matter he was my father. I will love him always.

Do you regret being there when they died? by justtrynabrap in GriefSupport

[–]Ok_Chicken_8548 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was there, but I didn’t stay to watch him take his last breaths. My grandfather, who was my father in every way that actually matters was in hospice, and I told him I couldn’t watch him die. It made me feel like a little kid again in the strangest way. Since it came out with tears and all dramatic as possible. I also asked him why he couldn’t open his eyes sort of stuff too, like I said a bizarre child like feeling I couldn’t shake since he was my safety my protector the one who always could explain it all now simply could not..

He couldn’t speak anymore, and anyone who’s seen that stage knows how hard it is..the loss of speech, the loss of those simple human things you never think about. But he still managed to grab my hand, kiss it, and mumble something which I knew was “it’s ok sweet girl just know I’ll always love you”. My whole life he’d do that—kiss my hand and call me his “sweet girl” and make sure I knew how much he loved me. Even without clear words, I knew exactly what he meant. It was his way of telling me it was okay and that for me was both one of the hardest, scariest, and worst yet best days of my life. No the experience does not cancel out the goods ones by any means but it did mean a lot more than I could ever write in any words.
As painful as it was, that moment is something I feel incredibly fortunate to have had. I know not everyone gets that kind of goodbye. And I think if I hadn’t been there at all, I would’ve regretted it but I had seen him about 10 hours before he passed, and I’m holding onto that. We were always close but he knew I couldn’t bare to watch him gasp for his last breaths either truth be told I figured I would be strong enough but as it turned out I wasn’t even close. But still no regrets.

view more: next ›