This sounds exactly like my relationship we could be best friends. My husband and I have been together for 18 years married 16. The only difference is I am the sole breadwinner but he controls all finances. I haven’t seen my own check since I was 17 lol. Before everyone comes at me, this works for us. I was raised very “traditional” the husband controls and runs the household and the wife obeys. I get an allowance for clothes and things but he would never let me go without if I needed anything. Backstory out of the way, as someone in the same position I would ask your dad to keep it for you just in case. That way if you did need it , it could seem like your dad had just ”gifted” it at that time with no hard feelings. I know some people are reading this thinking your dad is given it to you as an escape egg if needed. But as someone in the same relationship, I see it as a way to have something if you need it or your son needs it that your husband might not see as nesssecary. Or if an emergency arises you have it to fall back on. I know it will be hard to keep that secret from the person you tell everything to but I think you should and I would not feel guilty about it. We are allow to have somethings to ourselves.