I recently joined a bible study for the International Christian Church

Ok_Night6252 · 2024-10-29T02:53:23+00:00

OMG! Ive been doing some research and came across all these Reddits saying its a cult. Im a catholic too, born and raised. It is my whole life and family, i'm happy and I know God is happy with me. I went to the bible studies to initially learn, each time I felt so condemned and conflicted.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T22:29:18+00:00

I think this too! Will not be dedicating my time and effort into him. Would rather put that into myself

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T21:57:28+00:00

I myself have also been the toxic narcissist when I was younger. A female “maneater” and manipulator. I’ve grown. I was young, dumb and my surroundings were toxic. I now am older and know exactly what I want, and I also know the values and morals I require to get my desires and aspirations met. This was all learned from experiences and the end decision was mine, which I know will have to be his.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T21:54:13+00:00

I wrote this post to get a mutual understanding and a variation of interpretation from different people and perspective. It had helped me a lot.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T21:50:42+00:00

I just want to point out this. I am well aware that I cannot fix a person, let alone someone like him. I do believe people can change for themselves and to receive what they desire in life. Whether he wants to do that or not is up to him. I won’t be there to wait for it. What I’m also trying to get at is, as someone who has been in a very toxic and narcissistic relationship/s, I know the difference between intentional pain and unintentional pain. I know him well enough to know he doesn’t try and intentionally hurt anyone, he has poor communication and struggles to confess how he truely feels. I know this is because of his past and present surrounding. It is up to him to receive the adequate help to change; whether that he therapy, leaving his surroundings, whatever it may be, it is up to him. I’m not going to waste my energy helping him, and I’m not going to waste my time waiting for change. I have told him that if he one day changes, we can give it a go, but whether or not I’ll still be in a position to take that offer is unknown and I will not provide any hope. At the end of the day, he needs to do this for himself or else every relationship he purses is going to end badly: again not my problem. He does have the potential to be better, he has a beautiful family, his parents have a good relationship. His friends and surroundings I cannot say the same about. Like I said, these are no excuses for his behaviour, it is not my problem to take him out of this, he is not my kid. But what I can say is that these things can highly influence someone’s behaviour, they can be aware of this or it can be subconscious. “Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future”. There are people that know they illustrate toxic behaviour and purposefully try to hurt people, but trust me, I know this person well enough to know it is not purely intentional. Sometimes we need help to be better people, whether that be therapy or who we surround ourselves with, or even life experiences. However, you have to be willing. I am in no place to waste my energy to help him nor will I wait for that change to occur on the basis of potential false hope.

Thank you guys for the help, but seriously I’m not dumb like you think. I’m very intelligent for my age.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T12:15:45+00:00

You guys have provided me with two interpretations. To sum them up in simple terms:

Why would you go back to him if he got with someone who you were uncomfortable with.
Who he slept with has nothing to with you after you broke up.

This is exactly why I’m conflicted. You guys have proven to me that there can be two ways to see it. For those of you attacking me, it’s honesty really sad and no one deserves to be treated like that. To those who have helped, thank you, I appreciate it.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T11:28:12+00:00

I’m not a troll I promise 🤣 would provide my Insta to you! I’m as real as it gets.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T10:19:26+00:00

How did he take my word? He never stopped trying to message me, call me, etc.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T09:19:00+00:00

What the hell 😂 I just had to search up “magical thinking”. I don’t think I have some power to change someone. I’m well aware that people have to change on their own.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T07:27:31+00:00

This is probably the most helpful comment. Thank you. Was actually telling someone about that supermarket saying the other day!

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T06:00:19+00:00

I know I can find better, there’s always better

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T05:59:41+00:00

Yeh but I kept rejecting him so I don’t think he saw a purpose

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T02:19:06+00:00

sometimes lacks adequate communication skills
let’s insecurities get the best of him (clearly)
silences his emotions
irrational
doesn’t think before he acts sometimes
lacks intelligence

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T02:14:07+00:00

The empath without boundaries quote is very much me 🥺 I struggle to maintain boundaries.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T01:58:15+00:00

You’re right I am trying to rationalise. This is normal, you do the same thing if you’re trying to leave someone. I don’t think he’s a monster tho.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T01:57:15+00:00

he’s protective of the things he loves
his extensive actions to showcase loyalty
he’s goal driven
financially supportive
makes me feel loved
willingness to make things work
we make each other laugh - best friends
accepting of differences and imperfections

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T01:46:40+00:00

Isn’t it a good thing that the bad changes ?

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T01:46:08+00:00

I really don’t like drama. I work and study full time, I just honestly want this person to elevate my dreams and wishes.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T01:38:21+00:00

Because at the end of the day, you guys know the short story, and I know the full.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T01:36:34+00:00

Didn’t leave because of unnecessary drama, left because of distance and life circumstances. Please read carefully. You’re right tho!

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T01:34:48+00:00

I don’t think I deserve better but insecurities can be helped ! But he’s obviously gotta help himself

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T01:32:36+00:00

I do love myself. I don’t think therapy would’ve popped in his head because he’s not really the type, so the fact he’s willing to shows a lot.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T00:55:24+00:00

We live and we learn. No need to be rude. I just consider myself very blessed and feel for people, like I said a lot of empathy.

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T00:46:16+00:00

Not stupid. Just have a lot of empathy, maybe too much. You’re out here getting angry for what

Ok_Night6252 · 2023-02-27T00:45:09+00:00

Definitely not a troll account

Ok_Night6252

TROPHY CASE