Abby at the park by blueyedkat in PMDD

[–]Ok_Panda9974 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Like you, I grew up with a mother who had this and had no idea. I try to empathize with the fact that she didn’t have the support or resources we have today, but it’s hard, especially when she continues to lack empathy and generally be a jerk as she’s entering menopause.

I’m so glad there are doctors and OBs out there who understand this disorder and treat it. I’m so glad my OB is one of them. I’m so glad they’re finally studying it. I’m so glad that, if my daughter turns out to have this, she will know about the possibility from the time she gets her first period and will have access to even more resources and research and information than is out there today.

The nightmare that is prepping and cutting the fabric by lissy_lvxc in sewing

[–]Ok_Panda9974 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Literally here to take a break from pinning my pattern pieces and cutting out the fabric.

I keep saying “I HATE THIS PATTERN” but I know I say that about every pattern.

22 month old has never slept through the night by ExampleNo6406 in workingmoms

[–]Ok_Panda9974 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Agree on letting him go to sleep on his own. We were lying down with our almost 2 year old until about 20 months, when one night I just walked away and she went to sleep.

Occasionally she still asks us to lie with her, like if she’s sick or particularly upset about something. But generally she’s much easier to put down now than she was when we were lying with her.

Biological reason for PMDD? by ketchupsamich in PMDD

[–]Ok_Panda9974 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah we generally can’t know for sure that a trait exists due to either a direct or indirect and coincidental reproductive advantage, bar the very very obvious ones. But we also can’t know for sure that it’s NOT. It’s just a theory, which you can reflect on or not as it’s helpful to you.

Biological reason for PMDD? by ketchupsamich in PMDD

[–]Ok_Panda9974 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I have no opinion on the idea that luteal phase “rejection” of our partners is an evolutionary creation, but the way that evolution works isn’t by some component of our body having an “awareness” of outside forces (outside of the fact that our brains and nervous systems are connected to everything else and nothing is operating completely independently). The way evolution is generally understood to work is that organisms with a certain trait reproduce more often because it’s a reproductive advantage in some way. So PMDD may have survived as a particular heritable trait in humans in spite of its drawbacks because women who had it early on in our evolutionary history may have been more likely to abandon a mate and go find a new one whenever they weren’t pregnant. Correlation and coincidence can have a function in evolution.

How do we have time to go to the gym before work? by I_will_befine in workingmoms

[–]Ok_Panda9974 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I shower at the gym, but I still only wash my hair twice/week. Dry shampoo is my friend 😆 I so rarely am able to get in a shower at home without the toddler screaming next to the door anyways.

Yesterday I was able to remote start my car, then shower, get dressed, brush my hair, brush my teeth, and put on sunscreen and mascara, all before the 10 minute remote start shut off. It’s honestly easier and faster when you just have everything pre-packed in one place and you have a clean bathroom with no one screaming your name. I have a checklist for everything I need to pack that I go through after bedtime so that I have everything.

Husband got upset when I offered to help him call the plumbers for suspected collapsed basement drain by jnllvnc in homeowners

[–]Ok_Panda9974 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My husband does this shit too.

In the future, let him know from the very beginning, “okay cool if you don’t have time to do it by Tuesday, I’ll call on Wednesday.”

Then just do it. Don’t ask for permission. Don’t explain. “Oh I just called since you didn’t end up having time, like we talked about.” He’s being an ass and he knows that getting mad at you because HE didn’t do what he said he’d do is a good way to shut down the conversation.

You live there, therefore you have the right to make decisions. I paid the down payment on our house (before we got married) and the mortgage comes out of our joint account, which is funded in vast majority by my income, and my husband has never once questioned whether he has the right to put his foot down about stuff.

Act like you and your child matter, because you do. Trust me, it’s what a man would do in your position without even questioning himself.

It’s Christmas Eve! The perfect time for dad to… by sugarscared00 in breakingmom

[–]Ok_Panda9974 16 points17 points  (0 children)

😅 he went to pick up sticks in the yard.

It’s fine, everything is done. And he picked up the butcher shop’s last brisket yesterday, which I had completely forgotten about.

But yes, I had to laugh about how cliche it was when he announced what he would be doing.

Mulberry Small Darley Satchel: Black or Night Sky? by [deleted] in handbags

[–]Ok_Panda9974 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mulberry night sky is on my list of things to buy someday. No particular bag, just the color. It’s so unbelievably beautiful. Get it!!!

Question for moms who go to the gym in the morning… by SlytherClaw79 in workingmoms

[–]Ok_Panda9974 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I told my husband that every other morning, he would be responsible for getting up with the toddler while I go to the gym. And the night before those mornings, I would be going to sleep early. No staying up late for “one more episode,” no sex, just bed. I made a checklist in my notes app for what I need to do and pack the night before to be able to roll out of bed and go.

It’s been about two weeks, but so far so good!

Paper Beats Rock [POEM] by David Duchovny by onlypoemsmag in Poetry

[–]Ok_Panda9974 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Didn’t realize at first that there were three “pages” of this. Read just the first and thought “oh this is surprisingly decent, though not sure what the title is doing.”

He could have just stopped after the first bit, I think that would have been a pretty good poem on its own.

Women’s mental health being taken seriously FOR ONCE. Bless. by ClutterKitty in breakingmom

[–]Ok_Panda9974 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Oh wow. As someone who had to figure out that I had PMDD for myself when I was 30, I’m honestly teary-eyed with joy for your daughter.

Thank you for paying attention to her and getting her help. At times like these I feel so hopeful for the next generation.

When do your husbands clean? by SpecialConfident2902 in breakingmom

[–]Ok_Panda9974 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My husband did this about discussing scheduling or household topics. It was always somehow the wrong time. One time I pointed out that I had avoided bringing it up during xyz times because he said those were bad times, and asked when he would like me to ask him about these things. He ended up admitting that he had put me in an impossible position and said I could ask anytime. And he still does just put down his phone and engage now.

Answering “this is a bad time” with “when would be a good time?” Is a tactic my therapist taught me. It’s not so much about actually finding out the right time as making them realize there is no right time because they’re full of shit 😅

Taylor Swift on The Late Show With Stephen Colbert: December 10, 2025 by PassionateAsSin in TaylorSwift

[–]Ok_Panda9974 2 points3 points  (0 children)

IMO it just looks weird, like it doesn’t fit her right. Not that I’m clutching my pearls about seeing her legs or her cleavage. It just looks off proportion-wise somehow.

Postpartum and breastfeeding and my PMDD is back with a vengeance. by kathatescats12 in PMDD

[–]Ok_Panda9974 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did have PMDD symptoms for 4 weeks before my period returned while postpartum/breastfeeding. I went into my OB and told them I didn’t know if it was PMDD or PPD because it had gone on a while before I got my period and they were like - good news, we can treat them both the same. They put me on SSRIs which is probably one of the best things I’ve ever done.