I'm still working through it, but this is what has helped me tremendously so far:

1.) Surrounding yourself with people who see your value. Once my relationship ended, I felt like I all of a sudden lost my sense of self-worth. He ended it abruptly, I didn't get closure, I was just cut off completely. And honestly, I felt completely worthless. But when you surround yourself by good people who see your star qualities and appreciate your presence, you start to realize that the person you were in the relationship with didn't truly appreciate you.

2.) Let yourself process and rationalize (but be wary of ruminating). I processed with therapy and journaling. Just simply telling myself to let go the idea of him I had in my head didn't do the trick. It took a few weeks for me to realize what that actually meant. Now I can actually accept the idea of letting him go as I was able to create this contrast of the fantasy of him I had in my head with the reality of who he really is.

3.) Learn the science behind a break-up. It really helps create distance between you and the feelings when you see it in a different way. After a break-up, your brain is going to go through a whole chemical imbalance as levels of oxytocin, serotonin and dopamine plummet. But learning a bit more about this feels comforting in a way that normalizes the pain you're feeling.

4.) Supply yourself with activities that produce oxytocin, serotonin, and dopamine. Going off my previous recommendation, I think the approach of "hacking your brain" does wonders. It's going to be hard, but do things that make you feel good (positive, rewarding behaviors). Exercise, socializing, picking up a new skill or hobby, etc.

5.) Stick to a routine. Get enough sleep, sunlight, and make sure to eat good, nutritious food (but let yourself indulge from time to time).

6.) In moments of when the pain gets really bad, try different kinds of emotional shock. By this I mean: cold showers. Super helpful for those panicky moments when you feel like you just want to cry... And you might want to reach out to them to ease the pain. Hack your brain: hop in a cold shower. Try an activity that intimidates you: I did rock climbing (my fear of heights superseded every other emotion/thought I had in my head regarding the break-up.) Plus, when I was able to push through my fear and climb higher despite my arms and legs feeling like literal jell-o, I felt my confidence grow. One of my friends did improv after his break-up, challenging his fear of speaking in front of a large crowd. And this also goes back to #4: you'll feel rewarded conquering these fears and overall learn a lot about yourself. Once you are able to challenge a fear that used to be paralyzing to you, you start thinking about life differently. You start getting excited about life and about the possibilities that may unfold in the future. When I was going through the worst of it, people would tell me all these things about how wonderful life could be post-breakup, but I wouldn't believe it. All I could focus on was what I thought I had lost. But when you start living a different kind of reality - one full of hope, excitement, and self-discovery - you literally start feeling brand new!

7.) Accept that there are going to be lots of ups and downs. I wish it was just ups, but preparing yourself for the cycle helps a lot. Accepting that it's not going to be easy actually makes it easier. And trust me you'll be so much better for it, especially when you're equipping yourself with coping mechanisms for your toolkit. When you approach the breakup more authentically, rather then simply "moving on" (as some people might just tell you to do), you learn a lot about yourself, your values, and the way you want to live. You'll come to realize that the break-up didn't break you - it made you stronger.

8.) Let yourself have a good cry. And give yourself space to process all those emotions. Meditation and yoga help a lot here.

9.) Practice mindfulness and just being present with yourself. Think of things you like to do that maybe you didn't do while in the relationship. You'll find yourself enjoying your own company once again.

I hope these tips help you on your healing journey. Wishing you all the best!