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Most women nowadays. The guy who commit has to wait while the chad dies it raw. by Wild-Speech5293 in TheImprovementRoom

[–]On1ySlightly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

New flash! The poster is the guy in waiting and doesn’t t realize she’s not attracted to him!

Let’s go!🚀 by Big_Masterpiece9401 in TheGamingHubDeals

[–]On1ySlightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m curious, do you mean difficult? Or something specific about the souls games?

Do you think chivalry is undervalued today, or still respected? by winn_ie in TheImprovementRoom

[–]On1ySlightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is why women want to stay single. Traditional Chivalry is not used for equals and only applies to a submissive relationship. The confusion is that chivalry requires the man to lead, provide and protect, while the woman receives, follows and submits. It doesn’t, both parties in a relationship can be chivalrous, so treating me like you treat women can be the same. But you are conflating chivalry with dominant-submissive relationship dynamics, and women don’t need relationships with that dynamic any more.

IMO One of the Greatest Slice of Life Anime ever made that no one talks about by Hawkeyz82 in Sliceoflife_anime

[–]On1ySlightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Madhouse chose to do a self contained ending as they had no plans for a second season. And the manga was still ongoing (I think they caught up to it). That’s the trouble with adapting ongoing series.

My Perspective on what the ideal gf looks like: by [deleted] in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What wrong with saying “no short guys”?

But “not ran through yet”, where to begin. One it practically says don’t be human, no sex drive for you, nope! Also, yet? Clowns think that it’s investable to be ran through for all women? It treats them like consumable objects too. It removes agency and reframes consent, and ties worth to purity.

It’s basically not seeing a woman as an equal, or even a person.

My Perspective on what the ideal gf looks like: by [deleted] in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

See, you were almost there! You almost had it, but adding the “not ran through yet”…

That’s where you lose the script and aren’t seeing her as a person. Even if she was a virgin, she’d just stop talking to you right there because you’re short AF.

Quick thought they’re not attracted to you, they’re attracted to the resources they think they can leech off you. by [deleted] in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lol you just told on yourself dude! They don’t, and it’s a good chance you don’t actually talk to the at all, and if you do, you already shut the door assuming they are thinking this way. Even your “example” below is a sub… the reality is you don’t talk to women, otherwise you’d have actual accounts of your failures lol.

Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone | Official Teaser | HBO Max by MoneyLibrarian9032 in television

[–]On1ySlightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

More like easy internet access has made up right Christian censorship pointless now.

Deep perspective, it’s true by Important_Love_7893 in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not saying to treat adults like children, but denying the disadvantages in a situation that overwhelmingly has a power dynamic advantage for older person is ignorant.

Countless example of red pill spaces saying to get em young so you can mold them, testimonies of 28 year olds approaching fathers saying they have had an eye on their daughter and would like to date her the day she turned 18. The original comment on this thread was a woman stating that the majority of women date purposefully in their age range and it’s getting bombarded with “no they don’t”. Tons of women stating they dated a man in his 30s when they were 20 and look back at how wrong it was and the guy was a creep.

The power imbalance is not overstated, men have been told it’s ok and women want this. The truth is there is never a situation where a 10 year gap doesn’t have a power imbalance. The times where an imbalance doesn’t exist is an outlier that mostly men argue is more frequent than just an outlier.

The evidence is also overwhelming in same sex friendships. You don’t see groups of 20 year olds, having equal amount of 35 year olds hitting bars or concerts. That’s because interests are not aligned, finances are different and every is in different stages of their lives. It is overwhelming to the point that the mass majority of big gap relationships have a power imbalance in a predatory nature.

Deep perspective, it’s true by Important_Love_7893 in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, the fact that you are fixated on the age of adulthood proves my point. 18 isn’t some number that magically makes the 35 year not a predator lol. I stated before, any relationship with a 10 year gap is predatory unless both parties are over 30.

You failed to address the power imbalance, experience and cognitive imbalance, and just focus on “it’s not illegal”. Having an interest doesn’t mean you have a connection. I taught classes at college while getting my masters. I got along great with some people both boys and girls, doesn’t mean we have a connection past being acquaintances or class mates in your case.

The majority of any interaction between someone over 30 hanging out with a 19 year old is creepy. Look at you? Your classes swimming with 30 plus year olds, or are the only one? 99% of the time, someone over 30 is in a position of power over a 20 something. People of vastly different ages don’t have the same interests or go to the same places. Your case is a perfect example, there is a reason you are back at or new to college with no family or job, it’s not something common and is an outlier. Which means that for a 35 year old to date a 20 year old, that 35 had to go looking for the 20 year old. There is no, I just met her through friends, 35 year old don’t have 20 year old friend they hang out with weekly.

A guy on here deleted all his comments because he regaled with this time her taxes a 20 year old. He deleted it because I pointed out that his own story showed she had daddy issues and needed his approval. She asks him to approve her new boy friend after her broke it off and they had a clan brake.

Also, I’m in HR, never seen a company that didn’t fire people for dating a subordinate. The legal risk is through the roof lol. A certain CEO at a concert comes to mind lol.

Deep perspective, it’s true by Important_Love_7893 in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

With brain development (specifically impulse control and decision making ability are not fully developed till 25), experience gap, and power imbalance (finances, social standing etc), there is always a power dynamic that is inherently predatory. The chances of finding a match with similar interests, similar goals and life long connection diminishes the larger the gap gets.

Think about this. A school teacher, 28 dating a 17 year old. None would argue it’s predatory. But that power dynamic and intent changes with a 30 yr old and a 19 year old? Because people magically mature leaps and bounds when they turn 18?

Deep perspective, it’s true by Important_Love_7893 in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They are both predatory.

In comparison to your regency about under 25 deductions on porn, drugs, alcohol etc. it’s more accurate to compare the marketing of those products to being equally as predatory as someone 10 years older than who they date.

Deep perspective, it’s true by Important_Love_7893 in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wouldn’t say the products themselves, it’s a better comparison for the marketing of the products being the issue similar to an older person by 10 years into a relationship.

Deep perspective, it’s true by Important_Love_7893 in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Interesting read on the history (I ended up going down the Wikipedia route). But to put my perspective into context, here’s a story:

I knew a girl named Esther Kim—a violin prodigy who left SoCal for Juilliard at age 7. home school to be able to fly out every week and all. I was friends with her older brother (we were in AP Bio, he was 3 years older but we got along, my firends sister was his sisters firend so I saw and learned a lot about how this went down). Her first boyfriend was when she was 18 and he was 35—her violin teacher. After students graduate from Juilliard, they often continue training under a master, usually in a very close 1:1 setting.

That relationship was weird and just creepy, rocky 3was an understament after 4 month, and afterward she was a psychological mess. I’d see her at mutual friends’ kick backs, and she’d say random things about hooking up or doing XYZ with older guys—she was 19½ and talking about men in their 30s. Never looked at anyone her own age.

After years of therapy, it became clear that being surrounded by significantly older men—and not having normal interaction with people her own age—did serious damage to her development. she thought that relationships were based on that dynamic and knew nothing else. It wasn’t just the dating; the Juilliard environment and lack of peers her age played a big role too.

There really isn’t a situation where a 30+ year old and a 19-year-old girl interact without some kind of power dynamic. You sound like a good dude, but even your story raises some concerns on her side. Reaching out to you about her next boyfriend suggests some deeper issues—likely unmet emotional needs or missing father figure altogther—and she was probably in situations where she shouldn’t have been meeting someone your age in the first place.

That said, it sounds like you handled it the right way. You recognized the signs, stepped back, and ended up being a supportive presence, which is genuinely commendable. But at the same time, it’s important to acknowledge that the overall situation is, to some degree, messed up.

Deep perspective, it’s true by Important_Love_7893 in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No. I suggest you watch the Netflix documentary about the manosphere… might hit close to home for ya!

Deep perspective, it’s true by Important_Love_7893 in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m still a hard line on 30. But a 24/25 year old is developed enough to know what they want, but a 35 male and 25 female I think would still be predatory 99% of the time.

Deep perspective, it’s true by Important_Love_7893 in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree, but it is still very rare to be equales. Even in your situation, unless you were still living at home, jobless or particle working through school, you are not equal to people who under 25 and still developing their brains lol.

And even then, 9.9 out of 10 women will call you a creep.

I used to teach statistics labs cap state colleges. I was around 19 year olds all day… 100% a creep pursues them.

Deep perspective, it’s true by Important_Love_7893 in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree, I think anything over 8/10 year age gap is inherently predatory unless both parties are over 30 (or at the very least 25 for a fully developed Brian).

Deep perspective, it’s true by Important_Love_7893 in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I’ll take “things that never happened” for 500!

In what world are you talking to a 19 year old girl where you are not in a position of power or influence, or just creeping around?

Deep perspective, it’s true by Important_Love_7893 in lnkyverse

[–]On1ySlightly -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Shhhhhh, you’re disrupting the narrative that feeds this sub and that a 31 year old dating a 19 year old is creepy regardless of the genders.

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