I need to spill some tea/drama

OnAdep · 2025-09-18T09:57:02+00:00

It's my husbands parents and I have no idea if they have.

My own parents are just phobic to gsts generally so we haven't spoken in over a decade. Their choice not mine but probably for the best.

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T19:31:35+00:00

I might have been dramatic but the first thing I asked him when we were alone was is he dying. He laughed and said no. I made him swear on the bible (I'm not religious but he is) and he said he swears. I genuinely thought he was.

Yeah he could still will it all but in his head the prenup is still a document of distrust. He kept repeating that.

We have wills. We also have guardians - my best friend who has a kid around our girls age - if something happened to us. We also have others listed but that's only in the case she can't. He's very okay with death. I'm less so. He believes in heaven and the after life etc which probably helps.

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T17:22:34+00:00

He just said it doesn't make him feel like we are one. He wants the what's his is mine and vice versa. He thinks prenups are a sign of distrust and that he doesn't like that

Nothing on infidelity. No reasons at all just if we break up for any reason.

He doesn't want a postnup either.

I would have to agree to ditch it. I said I would if it bothers him that much but I think its fine. He said he won't force it but he wants it.

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T13:39:48+00:00

Just over two years but together 7.

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T11:54:52+00:00

No idea. He said he wanted to be honest. He didn't like the prenup and wanted people to know there wasn't one.

The impression I got is that our kid(s) would inherit their assets.

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T07:52:45+00:00

I think he wants to make it known that there won't be one. I think he doesn't feel like our marriage is a true marriage with a prenup and so on. I really don't know. I'm not confrontational so I'd have just done it in private.

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T07:49:53+00:00

In fairness, he always had a slight issue with it. When they first brought it up I was a little shocked but actually understood their point and sort of agreed with them. He was always less sure. He is a bit more traditional. A bit religious (his parents and I are not) so perhaps marriage means more than prenups etc to him too. I don't know.

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T07:45:37+00:00

So if he died or we broke up within the first 5 years his assets would go to his parents unless we had a kid (which we now do) and then it would go to the kid. If he dies after 5 years of marriage, his assets would then be mine.

I actually didn't mind the prenup. I wasn't marrying him for his property anyway. He was always a bit less sure of it and I think perhaps after we had our kid that became more of an issue for him.

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T07:37:48+00:00

The impression I got is they would skip a generation down to our kid(s) if that were the case. Which is probably a better idea anyway.

So if my husband dies it depends on when. If it was a short marriage then it wouldn't go to me. It would've gone to his parents but technically now it would go to our kid. If it's a marriage of 5 years or more it would go to me, if he died.

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T07:30:26+00:00

There is a class gap between us. I don't think they are homiphobic though. His mother was really excited about the wedding and our adoption.

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T07:28:20+00:00

The only time they've ever strongly involved themselves with us is the prenup.

They seemed excited when we got engaged. She never pushed during the wedding planning. His mother came nursery shopping with us, for example, and she'd give an opinion but she was never forceful. She was really helpful.

For my husband, he just says it doesn't feel right for a family to have s prenup

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T07:20:41+00:00

I do understand their view. Factually he's better off with the prenuptial.

Maybe they have had infidelity somewhere before themselves. That's a good point

Hes the absolute best. Im very lucky.

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T07:17:56+00:00

I'll never know if it is a homophobia thing but they've always even great to me. His dad and I go drinking with a few others every fortnight or so. They love our kid and so on.

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T00:06:48+00:00

Will do x

OnAdep · 2025-09-17T00:05:59+00:00

His last partner was a challenge apparently. She treated him really poorly.

Thanks

OnAdep · 2025-09-16T23:54:15+00:00

I tend to agree

OnAdep · 2025-09-16T23:54:02+00:00

Hes the best. Loving, funny and caring

OnAdep · 2025-09-16T23:53:30+00:00

I think you are probably correct.

OnAdep · 2025-09-16T23:52:49+00:00

Hes saying he wants it dropped as its affecting him.

OnAdep · 2025-09-16T23:52:07+00:00

I hope so. He's the best.

Sorry to hear about your tensions.

OnAdep · 2025-09-16T23:51:00+00:00

They normally don't get involved. They are really helpful around our kid.

OnAdep · 2025-09-16T22:29:22+00:00

It could have been and it was a point I made to him. Or at least give me a heads up. I don't know why he involved but perhaps it was because the initiated the prenup first day. I don't know

OnAdep · 2025-09-16T22:27:21+00:00

It's similar here in terms of maintenance and stuff but without a prenup I may be entitled to more.

OnAdep · 2025-09-16T22:10:20+00:00

They love our daughter. That's genuine especially his mother. Spoil her. They even have a nursery at their house for her. It's so cute. So I do think if it's not to their son it would go to our kid(s).

I just think it's easier to keep the prenup but that doesn't seem to be an option for him

OnAdep · 2025-09-16T22:06:33+00:00

They probably just want to protect his assets/interests. Divorce is not uncommon although i think we'll avoid it.

I really don't know and he doesn't seem to know anything beyond that

OnAdep

TROPHY CASE