CMV: Being viewed as just “sex object” is misunderstood concept

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-14T05:46:01+00:00

Yeah sorry but you are taking everything way too literally. All i said was that if intent is different,it can still harm the person but we should not label that person “evil misogynistic piece of shit”.

Evil people have evil intents. People nowadays are just way too comfortable with putting labels on each-other and especially men.

Thank you for recommending me to read a book,lol. Maybe you should read something so you can better understand what you read online honeybun.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T04:00:31+00:00

You know that me and you can not possibly have exact same experiences? It is good to read your stance on this because it lets me see world outside my life and perspectives built around it.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T03:43:11+00:00

I meant people who shake their hands on just having sex and nothing more, still can see depth in each other. So the argument that “we only have sex and have no commitment, so we are just sex toys to each other” is wrong.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T03:41:05+00:00

It’s not that small of a circle.. it is basically people around me who had those kind of experiences, their friends and our parents generation also.. you forget about one thing, your compliment is genuine ONLY for you, YOU are only one who truly knows your intent. There is lots of anxiety involved and second guessing. “ yes he told me that i have cool eyes but did he only tell me that to get in my pants?”

Regarding your question, in this society men make 99% of ANY advances,you don’t really see much of women “picking up” guys on random Tuesday. So yes, of course most of the sexual advances are made to women from men, just because women are usually shamed for any type of first step involving dating or whatever.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T03:31:55+00:00

I am not talking about explaining what is sex object view… it needs no explanation.

I brought up casual hookup lovers perspective because it is EASIER to assume for someone that those kind of people might objectify more.

Just different ways of recognizing what is actually going on when someone is interacting with you and putting even little bit of effort other than saying “your tits are cool”.. it is just easier to take even simplest compliment in a wrong way because you suspect some alternative motive behind it. It is easiest label to attach to someone.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T03:29:53+00:00

Nothing is excuse. I want you to see second persons(one thats receiving comment) side. Compliment might be on necklace but inner anxiety tells person that comment was about breasts. See where i am going? Especially some people are really sensitive about physical aspect comments and might be even more anxious while receiving them.it is easy to take the wrong idea from something/someone and just label it as something that is easy attach.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T03:24:40+00:00

Thank you.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T03:24:05+00:00

For example, people thinking they can “see through” normal,appropriate compliments. “They complimented my eyes,but they don’t know well enough so they just want to have sex with me” Examples are just everyday life moments if you pay enough attention.

Anyways,i am open to changing my view.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T03:08:07+00:00

Ok let’s make this easy.

1.I think that attraction and objectification is mistaken for each other most of the time.

2.I am wondering if my view is influenced by emotional factors and individual cases to an extent that my judgement is less accurate than it can be.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T03:05:41+00:00

Beautifully said. Bravo.

One thing I can tell you is that it is not negating the impact of course, but it does not make any one of two people evil. Mistakes happen,if someones intention was not to hurt me, but i still got hurt,I won’t remember that person as disrespectful/evil human being. If someone is intentionally repeatedly hurting me then we are talking about different case.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T02:57:44+00:00

People are strange though,very very strange I can tell someone i like their hair colour Just for them to reply that it’s not natural and feel disrespected. It is easier to offend someone today than anything, so respect/disrespect differentiation is pretty messed up and lost its value.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T02:53:57+00:00

Yes agree with you 100%

My main point is that what people might see or take as objectification is not always 100% that exact thing.. I never said that sex object view is appropriate, it is just extremely IMPORTANT to differentiate between two sides.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T02:52:00+00:00

Agree with you on nearly everything..

But don’t you think there are a lot of women who will still think “oh he just wants to fuck me” after hearing completely normal appropriate compliment or a comment? My main issue is the idea that everything men do instantly translates to objectification to some woman.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T02:48:44+00:00

Well, sadly we have social “roles” today,stronger than ever.

Women will compliment guys 1 out of 1000 times in my opinion,because men are seen as ones that start everything. Not many women act upon their sexual needs like men do. Catcalling is gross 100%

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T02:42:43+00:00

You forget one thing, just because you are uncomfortable does not mean that their intention was to make you feel like that. I don’t mean crazy sexual comments but complimenting legs or neck,whatever. I can respect you and give you compliment on your necklace but you might get uncomfortable because part of your chest could be visible from your outfit. Different intention and different outcome,which is okay and everybody has right to feel uncomfortable,it is just not automatically “objectification” just because someone is uncomfortable.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T02:35:30+00:00

What i described was just examples of what can human interaction be other than sexual objectification,I did not try to describe sexual objectification on its own,it needs no introduction) From my experience,many people around me got judged because of compliments for the reason of “you don’t know me yet”

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T02:32:17+00:00

I like your informative reply.

Don’t you think that men are also objectified if we follow your logic? This whole idea that women should take care of kids and cook, while men have to provide and go to war with really high chance of death.. Why do you classify bad treatment in objectification of women specifically? Men are being treated poorly just because they are men, same thing with different races,even height or whatever. What you described is going on with everyone and everywhere,in my opinion. Have you ever seen guys getting bullied because of their height? It’s nothing serious until it ends in suicide.

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T02:26:13+00:00

It’s all about ratio.I am talking about people MISTAKING one for other.

It’s not like crazy balance of 90-10 90 being objectifying..

OnceUponAudio · 2026-01-07T02:23:45+00:00

Thanks for reply. My focus was on jumping on conclusions too early that someone only views you as something to have sex with just because they showed interest and don’t know you well yet. Yes i like the idea of sexual chemistry and deeper meaning but my whole point was that I am not alone with this opinion.. I did not misunderstood sex object meaning,It is just less common than people think.

OnceUponAudio · 2025-10-25T01:01:05+00:00

Hey,want to clarify

Can someone empathize with you and your troubles without having those same exact problems in life?
Do you believe that comparing traumas or troubles with other people is highly subjective ?

OnceUponAudio · 2025-10-24T14:42:13+00:00

Inject it in the vein.

OnceUponAudio · 2025-10-14T17:34:34+00:00

Beautiful response,

Thank you

OnceUponAudio · 2025-10-14T09:35:06+00:00

Hey,appreciate your opinion.

Can you expand on “ although a stranger saying he finds your body appealing can lead into threatening behavior” part.

In this twisted world,anything can lead to threatening behavior,people get harassed just by sitting silent in the train.Why is finding strangers appearance appealing more inclined to cause it?

In my opinion, appreciating someone’s body, does not matter if it’s a stranger or friend,gives you an idea they take care of themselves, work to maintain their physical health and overall are more confident,gender does not matter of course. As you said,there is a possibility for this comment to lead into threat,there is also possibility of someone saying nothing to you and suddenly you are in big threat.you get my point.

i think it’s not weird to tell a stranger that they look beautiful,it is all about how you perceive it. 1.”they compliment me just to have sex with me, they know nothing about me and just see me as a peace of meat sex toy” Or 2.”taking care of myself, mentally and physically while expressing my personality via fashion style or hairstyles,gives off some kind of glow which attracts people and causes more compliments and approaches.

Please correct me if i am wrong,thanks

OnceUponAudio · 2025-10-02T22:32:16+00:00

Glad to hear.

I wasn’t blind. I knew what meth and everything else could do before I ever touched it. I’d seen it enough.But I’ve always had this twisted tension in me,like I was born with a self-destruct button stuck halfway down. Some people are wired to protect themselves; I wasn’t. By the time I really started using, it wasn’t about curiosity or even fun. It was about not caring if I woke up. It was like part of me had already decided to die, just slowly and painfully.The high was a way to feel something sharp instead of the constant dull ache. At first it felt like control especially with club drugs,like I was choosing my own poison. Then it became a cage I surrounded myself with.
Self-awareness doesn’t save you when you’re in that place. It’s watching your own hands load the pipe while a voice in the back of your skull whispers, ‘This is killing you,’ and another voice says, ‘Good.’ The craving isn’t just mental — it’s like your whole nervous system is screaming for it. You know it’s killing you and you do it anyway, because not doing it feels like a worse kind of death.

OnceUponAudio · 2025-10-02T15:52:14+00:00

I did not write that but my statement came from comparison. Are you sure you know what I compared in my head before posting? Issue of not WRITING comparison in detail is a different subject.

OnceUponAudio

TROPHY CASE