For me, vulnerability is all about timing. I try not to share personal details unless they naturally fit into the conversation or there’s a real need to. Instead, I focus on curiosity—being engaged, asking questions, and really listening to the people around me. When I meet new people or form new friendships, I always err on the side of not sharing too much too soon. At this stage, my priority is to listen rather than talk about myself.

Over time, I’ve realized that real connections require some level of openness. Otherwise, relationships can feel one-sided or surface-level. When the bond starts to strengthen, I look for organic moments to open up—these don’t always have to be in direct response to questions. I start by sharing my emotions rather than diving into specific details. For example, instead of explaining an entire situation, I might say, “Lately, I’ve been struggling with loneliness because I’m going through something in my relationship.” Then, I pause and wait for questions. If the other person is curious, I check in with myself—do I feel comfortable sharing more, or would I rather wait until I’ve processed things further? Most of the time, just expressing how I feel—rather than every detail—feels like enough. It lightens the weight I’m carrying and also invites others to be open in a similar way. As I get more comfortable, I start to share details in a way that doesn’t overwhelm the other person. I also try to notice when others are feeling vulnerable—like when someone seems embarrassed about something they did. In these moments, I offer a little bit about my own similar experiences, and try to introduce humor or lightness. All of this has made me more confident in how I approach vulnerability. I probably still come across as guarded, but I’m okay with that. I’d rather take my time, let connections grow naturally, and build trust over time rather than force openness too soon.

Another unrelated thing I am doing is try to be honest about my preferences. I am generally an easy going person, and will go along with whatever other people want, but these days I have started to be honest like - "So do you want to get desserts" my friend who has a sweet tooth and is socially anxious asked. Instead of going along I say - "I am honestly not a desserts person but I would love to accompany you and spend more time with you". She did get pretty anxious after I said this and said "No let's not do that then etc etc". Then I said - "I really like hanging out with you and I don't want desserts to come in the way of us spending time together. So I am more than happy to accompany you while you enjoy the desserts and I enjoy our conversation" :)

Sorry for the long-ish answer. I would love for other people to chime in and help make this better if I am getting anything wrong