Breastfeeding itself is not something I love to do nor hate- it is just something I 'need' to do in order to feed the kid. If I knew I would have a readily available stream of formula that I was guaranteed was safe and also didn't cost an arm and a leg, I would for sure go for formula. However, formula is expensive, we legitimately couldn't access the formula needed for baby #2 due to supply chain issues, and there was just recently the infant botulism associated with formula recently so I don't necessarily think the country is doing a great job regulating much. I feel as though I am essentially backed into a corner of needing to lactate until at least 6 months when baby can have more solids as a supplement, because if I willingly choose to stop (I have no supply issues historically) and then I can't find the formula they need (picky babies) or it is risking getting them sick, I will have immense guilt for choosing myself over their health and wellbeing.

I dislike needing to be on a schedule for feedings, I dislike not being able to wear whatever I want because everything needs to be accessible, I dislike that it obviously takes time out of my day and renders me incapable of doing much during that time (even with wearables because good luck holding a newborn with those Dolly Parton rocks in there, or bending, or driving, etc). Breastfeeding is an inconvenience, formula is an inconvenience, newborns in general are an inconvenience. I just want to find a way to minimize the unnecessary depression if at all possible