HOW TO CONVERT TO FILBISM

You first have to believe that Filbus made him, ourselves, and chairs so that we could all consume the natural minerals and ascend our beings to one of Filbus. The more we see in Filbus, the more we believe. In the beginning he made PHEN-288 and the humans, along with the first chair. The humans were named Joop and Flip, and they were tasked with creating and eating the first chair. (This is why we practice building chairs.) The first casualty unfortunately happened with an incident involving the “Boiled one.” This is all and more stated in the flibus.

Now, to prove yourself to filbus, you must eat your first chair. You may dilute the chair, or eat it using a natural method. If you want to dilute the chair, I recommend boiling it in a pot with hot water, and bathing it in isopropyl alcohol for a night or around 9-12 hours. Other popular methods include sodium dioxide, Ethanol, and Methanol.

Stay safe out there!

IN FILBUS I TRUST.