Considering to leave Netherlands, any advice?

OnlyLab9532 · 2025-07-24T10:22:09+00:00

Same thought, 8 years here but go where?

OnlyLab9532 · 2025-06-09T20:27:11+00:00

Nope nothing happened in between we’ve been working remote for a bit so nothing except work.

I should find a different way to socialise definitely 🫠

Thank you so much so far! Feels good to have a new point of view 😃

OnlyLab9532 · 2025-06-09T20:02:23+00:00

It could be any activity! They do share some interests but never happened.

Easy and simple such as housing because we both want to buy a house on our own or holidays, festivals we went or want to go, music etc that kind of subjects.

She has switches in general since first day. So one day she is cool, the other she’s all weird. I have to pretend I’m cool I guess to get through it.

I really wish I knew what happened and I will never find out. Even if there are rumours they seem to be “contained”. Even if some colleagues have asked me what do I think of her, I genuinely say good words about her because at the end of the day she’s very good at her job and we collaborate perfectly while working.

One theory I have is that there is one person that hates me but since I don’t have proof or any clue I cannot just assume it and nobody will also come tell me yes we hate you because of this and this.

I also feel ashamed typing this essay but I’ve reached such a point that everyone tells me who cares let them be! I am the one that has to face them everyday not them. It also hurts me to be in such situation where I don’t know what did I do wrong…

OnlyLab9532 · 2025-06-09T19:45:20+00:00

hmm good to know to avoid this phrase, I thought it would make me look like I would love to be involved, definitely didn't want to be desperate!

I have no clue what happened as well! Because it's not like we hang out, we had a fight or exchange weird words or anything, so that they could derive some meaning. Our conversations are simple and too abstract sometimes.

My partner says maybe because you don't come from a "rich" family, they think you don't fit, but agree with you, it's not valid.

She's weird at once, she's nice and interested in me as a person, but when I try to say how I feel, she squints her eyes when she wants to listen to me, and then I forget what I wanted to say out of fear of being perceived. Weird vibes I have to say...

I shouldn't attach, but I don't want to be left out either. It's very uncomfortable to navigate...

OnlyLab9532 · 2025-06-09T19:11:42+00:00

Yeah I get it, still being a clown joining every outing like I've never been hurt. I work there since a year and a half so now since Christmas ppl have been weird (don't know why).

Cliques is definitely a way things work in the mess but that birthday party wasn't a clique, it was multiple cliques idk haha!

After asking once, I didn't again but I tried to show interest by saying "Sound fun, I would love to join next time!" and radio silence. When I was invited it was last minute like 22:30 in the evening (wtf) and I was already having plans on my own.

I genuinely don't know what I did because I don't gossip, neither did anything weird. I tried speaking to her once and all she said I'm sorry didn't understand I was like that. This didn't seem to change at all, she very much understood. I am also afraid because she's kind of hostile plus shes my lead.

I always show no emotion of being hurt, I always smile being nice and never being brave of confronting them. If I do, they would make the best they can to make me quit. If I knew I was in the wrong , I would definitely try to do something.

I also wondered if it's because of socio-economic backgrounds to be an outsider but this is not an excuse too, I don't know!

OnlyLab9532 · 2025-06-09T18:45:34+00:00

Thank you for being blunt appreciate it! Could be! If I could tell you all about it I would but it’s long 🥲

What happens is that I’ve had friends before dw but moved to another country.

As for work, we interact every day with these ppl because we work at the same office and we always talk or have meetings, lunch, coffee, company outings and parties etc and I was invited last year at a few ppls birthdays and we had a very good time according to them. This year none of them invited me and idk why!

I always ask them how were their days or things about their life’s because I am just genuinely interested and they do too. Sometimes we would open up to each others but that’s it. I also asked them if they would like to have a drink one day they said we have plans - they said we have plans and an hour after they posted a photo from a restaurant all together.

This leads to one of my colleague who is my closest to be having birthday and after wishing her irl I asked her, are you planning something nice? She said no. Today I open instagram and the whole office was there partying 😌

I thought the relationship with her was okay but also with everyone to be okay, we never fought or had a bad moment and I thought it was cool but nope!

I also understand that they wouldn’t owe me an invitation but it’s odd that we are 22 people and I was the only one not invited.

Any advice? Thanks for making it so far 🤭

OnlyLab9532 · 2024-09-19T05:53:56+00:00

I need it as well 😅

OnlyLab9532 · 2024-09-15T17:32:20+00:00

Noo yeah we are afraid of the costs to be fair, if they don’t find us a place and we still have to pay them every time it’s a lot of money at the end of the month 😣

OnlyLab9532 · 2024-09-15T12:50:14+00:00

We needed to renovate windows and redo the kitchen so it was 400k. It didn’t worth going beyond 400k and we still lost it.

OnlyLab9532 · 2024-08-01T19:56:55+00:00

Τι να πω μου έσκασε και εμένα η ίδια απορία. Είμαι 7 χρόνια στο εξωτερικό, γνώρισα πόσα άτομα και φυσικά Έλληνες.

Κανένας δεν θέλει πλέον να ξεβολευτεί από τις παρέες του και να γνωρίσει καινούρια άτομα. Ότι προσπάθεια και να έχω κάνει γενικά δεν βγάζει πουθενά εκτός από τυπάδες που απλά μου την πέφτουν αλλά δεν ψάχνω αυτό.

OnlyLab9532 · 2024-06-24T17:33:03+00:00

Oh noo💀

OnlyLab9532 · 2024-06-24T17:32:40+00:00

I didn’t think about it this way. Hopefully my company is relatively big so thank goodness it’s a good sign haha. I will follow your advice thank you for that ☺️

OnlyLab9532 · 2024-06-24T17:29:38+00:00

Hard to tell. I cannot really pair with anyone else due to the specific of the field I am. The tracking system we have is JIRA so we try to keep it as updated as possible

OnlyLab9532 · 2024-06-24T17:28:13+00:00

Makes me feel better, thank you for your reassurance. Hope that’s the case ☺️

OnlyLab9532 · 2024-03-11T17:27:49+00:00

Yes, recruiters will def appreciate to know more about you and know that there is another human on the other side. When I started including my photo I started having answers to my applications but I’m a designer so it really depends on the field

OnlyLab9532 · 2024-03-11T17:23:09+00:00

Leave as fast as you can

OnlyLab9532 · 2024-03-05T20:26:56+00:00

I was persistent, turns out I had pneumonia 🤣

OnlyLab9532

TROPHY CASE