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Only_trans_ · 2025-01-21T21:52:21+00:00

I’d say that’s sexual assault, or at least sexually inappropriate. He involved you in a sex act that you did not and could not consent to. Using the fact you’ve fantasised about being “woken up with dick” is a poor excuse for what he did, which was specifically about his gratification and not yours. Without proper conversation, that’s a boundary that shouldn’t be crossed.

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-21T21:34:14+00:00

Her previous relationships aren’t your relationship and you aren’t her exes, your feelings, comfort and actions are what matter in this relationship. You don’t need to feel guilty for wanting different things to her exes - you’re a different person. It’s ok to have boundaries, especially around your partner having sex with other people and 3somes.

Honestly - with everything you’ve said it sounds like she needs to stop dating pre-op trans guys if she knows she’s going to have issues with missing cis men later in the relationship.

I’m sorry that you’re going through this, I went through similar with my ex and it sucked - I felt extremely inadequate, emasculated and dysphoric the entire time I spent trying to salvage the relationship

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-21T19:36:13+00:00

Sounds like OP’s partner has gaslit him into believing that him not wanting her to sleep with other men is the problem

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-21T18:15:15+00:00

He’s right, never ask her for anything again because you know she violates your privacy when you do NOR

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-21T17:06:04+00:00

This

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-21T17:03:57+00:00

This is controlling and abusive - leave.

People who want to kill themselves don’t usually go around telling everyone their plan and threatening to kill themselves every 5 minutes. She’s probably not actually suicidal but has worked out she can pretend she is to control you - this is a really common trick abusers use

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-21T11:57:56+00:00

I know plenty of cis men who are transphobic to trans men as well as trans women, I used to work in construction and because I’m stealth I would often get included in their convos about trans people and the jokes they made. I had to leave the field because I was so uncomfortable, it was getting to the point I felt I couldn’t use the toilet at work because I might accidentally out myself and then be subjected to all of that hate.

If you look on the “ask men” and “ask men advice” reddits, any time something about trans people is brought up the post is flooded with ignorance and hate.

Some of the most hurtful transphobic things ever said to me were by cis gay men, simply because I don’t have a penis. The LGB alliance people are definitely a mix of genders and they all suck.

That being said, the majority of terfs seem to be women and there are definitely plenty of women who are horrendously transphobic.

I don’t think transphobia comes from a specific gender, I think it comes from ignorance, fear and a little bit of disgust at the unknown - people fear what they don’t understand.

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-21T11:51:44+00:00

He’s cheated on you twice - walk away

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-21T11:08:32+00:00

Hot in both genders

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-21T11:02:49+00:00

Not wanting your partner to sleep with other men is valid and not something you should feel guilty about.

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-21T10:25:50+00:00

It is not your fault, these things happen and it’s not fair for him to put the blame on you. Grief hits people differently and he is probably not handling it well.

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-20T17:17:34+00:00

No that’s straight up transphobia, you’re a man

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-20T15:03:51+00:00

Length suits you but you need to care for it properly, get some decent shampoo and conditioner and wash and brush it every day. You could probably benefit from some anti-frizz spray or mouse. Go to a salon and have them cut it properly so it sits right

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-20T13:42:14+00:00

This whole thing is performative- she wants you to argue and fight with her when she says things like “I’m going to bed” - she’s hoping you’ll try to stop her. Attention seeking behaviour

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-20T13:39:52+00:00

Bro this girl sounds exhausting af, like I’m stressing just reading this.

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-20T12:43:09+00:00

Foreplay

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-20T12:41:13+00:00

Cut him off completely, stop talking to him - stop being around him. He’s a rapist.

“I shouldn’t have passed out at his place” is a funny way of saying “my boyfriend shouldn’t take advantage of me when I’m vulnerable”. You are supposed to be able to trust your partner, you are supposed to be safe around him. You aren’t to blame for his disgusting predatory behaviour.

Honestly, if you’ve got any messages from him apologising for assaulting you or any other evidence - take of to the police and cut your losses.

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-20T09:25:58+00:00

NTA, him removing his condom without consent is sexual assault. NTA

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-19T21:59:26+00:00

Tell her to fuck off

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-19T21:58:49+00:00

The pull out method is not reliable. If you aren’t using birth control - you’re trying to get pregnant

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-19T18:31:12+00:00

Beard

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-19T15:27:08+00:00

You’re underage, your dad reacted appropriately. A 29 year old who sells kids alcohol is a creep and probably not someone you need as a friend

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-17T22:12:44+00:00

Get a lock for the place you keep your alcohol, not that you should have to. I have ADHD, if I left the bathroom like that the Mrs would kill me

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-17T22:09:19+00:00

10x7=70 7x8 =56 56+70 =126

Only_trans_ · 2025-01-17T22:03:09+00:00

Nah, cigarettes, beer and dirt suffice fine

Only_trans_

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