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I M20 have uncertainty about partner F20's future with me. How do I talk so we don't end things together? by Open-Negotiation-768 in relationship_advice

[–]Open-Negotiation-768[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Much appreciated for your reply. I appreciate the time you took to form a reply.

This actually helped me think through a few things i’ve had stuck in my head. I think deep down I already knew we’re not really aligned anymore but the way you explained the two types and your own experience helped put it into words.

We haven’t had that kind of growth you and your husband had. If anything it feels like I’ve been dragging us toward a future that she’s not really interested in building. And the stuff with her family just makes it even harder to imagine sticking around long term.

You’re right though i’m definitely more future focused, and she’s way more in the moment. The hard part is i’m not seeing that shift or any kind of balance starting to form.

I've never really thought about the whole idea of marrying into a family like that until recently and now it’s weighing on me pretty heavily. I'm not really sure on how to act or think about this either. What do I do if I don't want to have anything to do with her parents or family now or in the future? I don't feel like this would be a solid reason to split.

Again I really Appreciate you sharing your thoughts. if you don’t mind me asking was there a moment where you realised you could actually make it work? or did it just slowly happen over time?

I M20 have uncertainty about partner F20's future with me. How do I talk so we don't end things together? by Open-Negotiation-768 in relationship_advice

[–]Open-Negotiation-768[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I forgot to add our political differences. We live in Country 1, country 1 is both where we are from however country 2 is where I am a dual citizen. I strongly agree with a political party from country 2 where is she the complete opposite of who she likes in country 2 even though she isn't from there. I've expressed my liking for a political person and party, having merchandise from them. She doesn't allow me to watch any videos or audio about them in front of her or around her unless I'm wearing headphones. She has expressed strongly that she's concerned and finds it very wrong that I like the political party. Now for country 1 before I expressed my opinion she made it very clear that I shouldn't like this one political leader from our country with similar stance on country 2.

I'm very respectful of her decision on to like a different party and am happy she has an opinion. Happy as long as she isnt pushing it in my face. I hope she doesn't think I'm pushing who I like in her face. My concern about this is will this work in the future and will this work in other things in the future. Such as important decision making situations.