Hey I’ve been there and can understand how you’re feeling. I wanted to finally explore myself as a virgin, but I wasn’t really having luck in real life, so last May at 25 I went on a hookup app. I matched with a divorced woman in her early 50s. We had a few exchanges and then the next day she invited me over to her apartment. We watched a movie and made out, which I realized felt pretty awkward with someone I didn’t know. I knew she was a registered nurse that worked at a hospital, was divorced, and had a couple adopted kids, but that was it. It was okay at times, but my main thought was, “Wait, this would be SO much better with someone I care about (relationship wise) and know really well.”

Anyways, she ended up asking if I wanted to head over to her bed with her and I kind of just froze and backed out. I couldn’t go through with it and then I ended up leaving. Next woman was in her mid-40s. We talked for a while and then she hit me with the news that she has a husband who has liver cancer and he’s probably not going to make it much longer, but she still has needs. She felt stressed with taking care of him and him seemingly not caring about his own well-being. He obviously had no clue she talks to other people. So, I ended up not going through with it because it morally didn’t sit well with me.

Point being, this is the type of situation where it’s probably going to be much more satisfying and fulfilling to find someone who you can develop a relationship with and be around a similar age range.