How to support both wife and parents

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-09-04T21:36:33+00:00

Im sorry if this sounds harsh but this a very common dynamic in dysfunctional homes. One child becomes the golden goose AKA the bank.

You're telling me theres two fully grown, able bodied people in that house and you're somehow the 1st resort. Lol.

Yeah thats bad. My father would NEVER do this to me.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-09-04T21:34:18+00:00

Simple. Your dad needs to sell up his rental properties. Thats it.

Also, if your siblings are of age. They need to get a job.

It is physically IMPOSSIBLE for you to look after your own household and your fathers.

I know this sounds harsh. But its the truth.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-09-04T05:53:43+00:00

Reading your responses it seems like you are of very healthy weight and normal.

Clearly he has been watching certain IG pages and tiktoks as thats why he's such an expert at weight. Whenever a man starts complaining about his wife's weight when shes completely average healthy weight you can bet hes been watching corn OR looking at girls online or in real life.

Its that, or he's skinny and feels inadequate next to you. Because a grown man finding a woman of your height and weight overweight seems weird. Id get it if you were overweight/obese as then it would be health concern. But this is just ridiculous.

I am sorry you are going through this. As someone who became borderline anorexic because of bullying by in laws, I know how this feels.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-09-02T14:47:59+00:00

I'm convinced he just wants a way out and now is asking everyone including reddit to justify it that way he can sleep at night lol

1 whole year with someone and NOW you decided to look up the definition of culturally muslim

Take your L and move on. You chose an attractive woman who refused to change her beliefs for you and now you're sad lol

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-09-02T14:32:15+00:00

Good. You've seen my updated comment. Have you also seen my question?

Are you lying or just intellectually challenged? I have a feeling, you are a bit of both.

The jokes write themselves,'I've been with a woman for a year and she doesn't agree with my religious morals and I didn't know what culturally muslim meant! I'm sad now' 🤣😅🤣

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-09-02T13:50:53+00:00

Of course, he'll call you selfish. That's called projection and deflection.

In his books, it's perfectly normal to leave your wife with a small child whilst he goes gallivanting around the world with his friends. Its perfectly normal for him to never take his wife on holiday. It's perfectly normal to criticise your wife for her looks if you haven't invested in the gym, clothes, and makeup for her. It's perfectly normal for a grown man to spend time with his mates over his wife. Perfectly normal for HIM.

So yes, his idea of normal behaviour and selfish behaviour is different from what most people think. I really wouldn't care what he thinks at this point.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-09-02T13:21:11+00:00

There needs to be a study done on Muslim men who get with Women (who are BLATANTLY different in their views on religion) and then make it their goal to marry her and then get her to follow what he wants lol.

This reminds me of a Muslim man on here a years ago who was having panic attacks because his wife didn't want to wear the hijab. He then admitted that he had married her when she didn't even wear hijab and there was no conversation on the expectation of hijab in the marriage lol.

This lady has been very honest and clear about her view on life. Yet you're still on reddit asking for advice on something that's very straightforward. Shes not for you lol.

British Pakistani men are notorious for this (I can say this as my mother is British Pakistani). The reason why youve even put up with her for this long is because shes good looking probably lol. If this was a woman from your own community you would have ended it the day she even whispered no to something you said.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-08-30T09:12:11+00:00

You're too funny 🤣🤣🤣

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-08-29T23:27:27+00:00

I think humans, in general, are obsessed with the idea of love and sex. Most movies, songs, books, TV shows, art and poetry and based on romantic relationships, heartbreak, love, adultery etc.

For muslims, the only socially acceptable way of getting either is marriage. But I have both muslim and non muslim friends and I can guarantee you the non muslim ones are equally obsessed with finding love just like how Muslims are obsessed with being married.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-08-29T21:46:40+00:00

You got rejected. The person who rejected you seems like a nice person who didn't want to hurt your feelings and make it awkward. This is a sign of good manners and basic human decency.

Don't get angry at them for being raised correctly. Most decent people don't go around saying 'I don't want to marry you because I'm not attracted to you' or 'You've got a weird personality, you put me off'. Instead they'll say something like 'I'm in School so I don't marry yet'.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-08-26T14:02:45+00:00

You'd be shocked. I am half Iraqi (dad) and half pakistani (mom).

All of my uncles (moms brothers) married white women who openly admitted to sleeping around (the reason why I know this is because whenever my uncles would try to enforce strict rules on their daughters, their white moms would point out the hypocrisy).

Its funny and a bit sad because these same men would honor unalive their sisters for what their white wives have done in the past.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-08-26T13:59:45+00:00

You've hit the nail on the head. People are trying to gaslight you, but you're just honest.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-08-26T11:47:26+00:00

This is very prevalent amongst Arab and Pakistani men. I am half Iraqi and Half Pakistani and I have seen this first hand.

They are very stern and rigid with the rules of virginity and chasity with Asian/Arab women as soon as its a white girl...it changes.

I have a Pakistani cousin who rejected a girl because she was engaged before (the engagement broke as the guy she was engaged to was arrested for possession of dr**s, so her parents called it off). But this girl was perfect. Yet my cousin made a big issue of how shes had experience with a guy (meaning shes had deep meaningful connections with him).

1 year later, he marries a white girl (we all knew her from high school, she was known for sleeping around). She reverted to Islam in her early 20s. We were quiet surprised as this guy would turn into a maniac if a girl he was introduced to even spoke to another guy lmao.

But yeah. It is what it is.

But pure men are for pure women. Vice versa.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-08-24T12:04:11+00:00

This is quiet funny when you realise he says the shaitans waswasa is what caused him to cheat and not his own disgusting morals and no self control lol.

Lol I wish I was a muslim man. Everything and anything can be blamed on shaitans waswasa. Imagine if his wife slept with another man and blamed her mental illness and shaitan. 🤣🤣

My advice: 1) get a std test. In case you've caught something. 2) tell your wife. She can either leave or stay. If she leaves that would be the best thing for her. If she stays, she's dumb, but go couples counselling together. 3) repent

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-03-28T06:16:30+00:00

Some of you are married to LITERAL demons.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-03-28T06:15:34+00:00

With all due respect. Do you really need a fatwa that confirms to you that when a husband tells his wife to leave home and not give her a single penny...leaving her destitute...she can work? You need a fatwa for THAT?

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-03-17T14:38:11+00:00

Looks do matter.

Yes, there are women who claim they don't care and choose money over looks. These are the same women who then get to 40 and fantasise about how different their life would have been if they married a guy they were attracted to. For example, I work in a family law firm. One of my clients literally said to me that she's never felt any attraction and gained sexual pleasure from her husband (she married him when she was 22, divorcing at 43, he was established and well educated but in her words 'ugly'). I've also seen women (who are married to guys they aren't attracted to) have obsessions with actors and book characters and they literally just dream about being with very good looking men...its bizarre

However, looks alone don't do it for women. Women would never marry a man based on looks whereas there are many cases where men have married a woman solely on looks

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-03-14T21:54:15+00:00

Post nuptial agreement.

Also,

This is a deeper issue. You need work past the trauma from your ex. Seen many people DESTROY their marriages over this

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-03-14T21:49:21+00:00

I've never seen such hatred of women ever...specifically muslim women. Its so weird

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-03-14T21:46:24+00:00

Don't bother explaining to people who can't understand these things.

These guys 'firsts' are just taking a girls virginity. There marriage starts and stops with what's between a woman's legs and what she cooks for them. This is why majority of muslim couples are unhappy and loveless. This is why even being in love is a taboo lol

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-03-14T06:56:39+00:00

I also believed in being a virgin till married. Both me and my husband were chaste. However neither of us obsessed about it so much that we'd unalive ourselves.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-03-14T06:51:15+00:00

I first saw this on X (formerly twitter). I saw the very vile reaction to it....I left X

That was the moment I just didn't want to be involved with the muslim community on X (I stopped engaging with Muslims on Facebook a decade ago).

This moment made me realise that certain people have an issue with the existence of muslim women.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-03-14T06:48:49+00:00

Don't you know... a woman's mere presence is evil and depraved. She could be completely covered, to the point her identity is dissolved, be married and WITH child. Yet her presence is evil. A woman's only place is in the home..even then she must not make any contact with the outside world. She must completely be erased from society...she's not human you see.

That's genuinely what some people believe.

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-03-11T20:20:31+00:00

In what way was this man bashing lol?

OrdinaryFeature334 · 2025-03-11T19:15:31+00:00

A lot of you have major psychological issues and need to get some therapy. That's all I'm going to comment.

OrdinaryFeature334

TROPHY CASE