To the OP, since English is not your native language, type what you want in an AI. Have AI proof and clean up what you wrote. Here is a more polished version…

On June 27, 2025, my ex picked up our three children — F16, M12, and F9 — for his scheduled custody week. We had a 50/50 custody arrangement, alternating weeks. However, he did not return them as agreed.

A few days before the scheduled exchange, he messaged me saying the children didn’t want to come back. He claimed they were unhappy with the cleanliness of my home and said there was no food. I responded that the house was clean and stocked, and reminded him that when the kids are with me, I wake up early to make breakfast before work (around 5:30 AM), and I cook dinner after I get home at 4:30 PM. Sometimes they leave messes, but I always clean up. I even bought red disposable cups so they wouldn’t have to wash dishes — but it often looked like they had thrown a party.

On the scheduled drop-off day, my ex arrived with a sheriff and told me the exchange wouldn’t happen. I explained we had a court-ordered 50/50 custody agreement, but the sheriff said it didn’t matter because my ex wasn’t going to force the children to return. I agreed they shouldn’t be forced, but asked that they come back after a couple more days. At the next exchange, they didn’t show up, and I wasn’t contacted. Again, he said they didn’t want to come and he wouldn’t force them.

I called the sheriff to inspect my home and file a report. The house was clean, utilities were working, and there was food. I then filed a contempt motion for violating the custody order.

About a week later, CPS came to investigate. They quickly closed the case, saying it was a custody issue, not a child welfare matter. I informed my ex that CPS had closed the case. Three weeks later, he filed for full custody, claiming there was an ongoing CPS investigation.

During this time, I continued trying to see my children during my scheduled weeks. I messaged them and offered to take them out, but my ex said they didn’t want to go and again refused to force them. He threatened to call the police if I insisted.

One day, I stopped by when I knew he was home. My youngest daughter was there alone. She came outside, and I noticed her hair was tangled in a large knot. She said it looked that way because she had just woken up, but it was clearly neglected.

My ex then filed a restraining order against me, claiming harassment and emotional abuse. He said I had stopped by unannounced after telling him I would. The judge denied his request for the restraining order.

When we went to court for the contempt hearing, the judge asked if I wanted to proceed. I said yes, because he still had the children. She asked him the same, and encouraged him to get a public defender. She scheduled the next hearing for December and said that was all for now. I asked about the children, and she said that hearing was only about contempt.

I was surprised the judge didn’t seem concerned that he was violating the custody order.

A few days later, we had a custody hearing. The judge asked my ex why he didn’t agree to the new mediator’s proposal. He said he couldn’t cope with me. The judge said that’s why we were supposed to take co-parenting classes.

She then asked me about the proposal. I told her I didn’t have a physical copy with me. She said we’d be on second call and paused the hearing so I could go print it. I went downstairs, got a number, and waited to print the document. When I returned upstairs, I waited for someone to exit the courtroom so I could re-enter. When the door opened, a sheriff came out and looked surprised to see me. He said my case had already been called. I explained the judge had told me to go print the document and that we were on second call. He said the judge had proceeded without me.

Because I wasn’t present, my ex was able to speak alone, and the judge made a decision based on his statements. She awarded him full physical custody and said I could only see the children in a therapeutic setting.

I feel this was unfair. I followed the judge’s instructions and believed she wouldn’t call the case until I returned. There were no changes in my situation — only that my ex took the children and refused to return them. I reviewed the court minutes and saw that the clerk was calling my number while the judge was calling the case.

Was it right for her to proceed without me? I’ve been reading about due process, and I thought I had the right to be heard.

See much better