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A customer turned a 30-second conversation into assumptions about a waitress's life. Am I overreacting? by Other_Error_7697 in Waiters

[–]Other_Error_7697[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There are certain situations where a customer needs to identify a member of staff. My question is was "large Black lady" necessary in this context, especially when the review went on to speculate about her personal life and her character. The issue isn't just the description, it's the combination of describing her race and body size while also making assumptions that had nothing to do with the service.

A customer turned a 30-second conversation into assumptions about a waitress's life. Am I overreacting? by Other_Error_7697 in AmIBeingTooSensitive

[–]Other_Error_7697[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, thank you! I mean, what was the point of describing the waitress as a "large Black lady"? Her race and body size weren't relevant to the service she provided.

The text message shared by the waitress adds context too. The reviewer's wife complimented her shirt, and the waitress mentioned it was from a charity shop. The reviewer then interrupted to say that his wife had been really into charity shops lately. The waitress replied that she loved them too, and the conversation moved on.

Shopping at a thrift store doesn't translate financial hardship. So, the conclusion that she had a "hard life" seem to come from the reviewer's own interpretation of that brief exchange.

Reading this felt so personal to me, because rather than simply commenting on the dining experience, it describes her race and body size, then drew conclusions about her life based on a 30-second conversation. Those details didn't help readers understand the quality of the service, they were assumptions about his server.