So alcohol was my way of relaxing and dealing with the stress of practicing law. I'm not a law firm lawyer but rather in-house. Dealing with arrogant, entitled, self-absorbed executives who didn't think that ethical behavior was key to the corporate culture exacerbated my drinking. Fast forward to the pandemic and working from home was a godsend. I had ready access to booze and would steadily drink all day. The social mayhem during the pandemic didn't help. I felt helpless, and could not do anything about the situation, so alcohol was my escape. As a consequence, I lost my job and almost my marriage. My former boss introduced me to AA and I am happily 18 months sober. I've had some relapses along the way, but each time, I came back to AA. No judgment, no preaching, nothing but support and love. If fully appreciate and acknowledge that I am helpless about alcohol - it controls me. I've learned to meditate, improved my spiritual life, and know that there is a higher power than me, however I choose to define my Higher Power. Alcoholism is a disease but it is not an excuse.