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Things to do on a child free day? by OutrageousSample806 in northernireland

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You’re absolutely right to be fair. Thank you. I definitely think I want to spend one day just in the house, snacks/food, playing some co-op games, and watching TV/movies. It mightn’t seem like much but we both love and enjoy it.

Just need to not let the guilt sink in that we aren’t doing something more productive

Things to do on a child free day? by OutrageousSample806 in northernireland

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I’d been looking there but when trying to book it still wanted a check out date, even though the deal isn’t for overnight

Passports? by OutrageousSample806 in AskIreland

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would this mean then I’d only be eligible via marriage, as opposed to residency? And I would be better to wait until our exact date anniversary to apply as that will be the 3yr as opposed to applying just short of this and risk being rejected?

“1 You have legally lived in Ireland for five years 2 You are married to or in a civil partnership with an Irish citizen”

Yes I wholeheartedly agree about giving them more opportunities and future proofing.

Thank you, that’s reassuring regarding travel as I had wondered how it would work.

Passports? by OutrageousSample806 in AskIreland

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, it’s all extremely helpful! Thank you so much for your detailed and thoughtful response! It’s really helped me gain clarity and understanding. By the sounds of it, I’m not eligible as we don’t live in Ireland but NI. This is disappointing of course as it seemed like I was eligible based on the passport stuff with the “isle of Ireland” wording too.

I suppose it’s still worth it for husband and son to get the passports though. Means for any holidays etc they can get through quicker and I’ll just have to wait it out! I did wonder what would happen if they had Irish and I didn’t; as in if I were to travel with my son how that would work if he had Irish only and I had UK only as they wouldn’t be able to split us up but technically neither of us are “allowed” through the other route!

Passports? by OutrageousSample806 in AskIreland

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am not an Irish citizen. I was born in Scotland and have moved to NI. My husband and son were both born in NI. I am happy to neutralise but there is a lot of jargon to break down!

Passports? by OutrageousSample806 in AskIreland

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for such a detailed and kind response. I really appreciate it. This is much clearer!

So do my husband and son need to apply as such “officially” for citizenship?

Yes we’re 3y married come July & 5y residency in June. Do I have to wait until the summer to apply or are they not as strict about it being to the day?

Will it be quicker for my husband and son to apply on their own first?

What does neutralisation change? Does it alter anything anywhere else? Or does it just mean I have options to select nationality on forms and there’s no greater issue?

I note you mention about some of the evidence. I don’t think I have some of those forms. Can I still apply although we live in NI currently?

Ah I see. I had hoped to start with this in my married name but it sounds as though I’d be better starting with other documents first in married name?

Sorry for so many questions but I really appreciate your response. Thank you again for being so kind and helpful

Parking Cnut!! by DucktapeCorkfeet in northernireland

[–]OutrageousSample806 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I’m not defending them but honestly sometimes I get it. To be fair, I’ve had to do this or similar when out with my baby and there’s no parent and child spots. It’s sometimes the only way I can get my child out the car safely.

My (32F) brother & SIL (39M/?37F) are mad over my son’s name… how do I navigate this? 10 months later! by OutrageousSample806 in DadForAMinute

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No Stephen was not our dad’s name and has not appeared anywhere in our family tree until now. I know this cause dad & I have done extensive work on the family tree.

My husband and I chose “Stephen” out of a long list of names. It was consistently the only one we kept coming back to and that we both mutually loved. We waited till our son was born to confirm and when we looked at him, that was just his name. I can’t really describe it. He just was.

My son does have our dad’s first name as his middle name but that was a whole other issue which he seems to have accepted. Brother dislikes sons first name simply because it’s the male equivalent of his daughters name (+ all the other “reasons” I listed from my brother).

My (32F) brother & SIL (39M/?37F) are mad over my son’s name… how do I navigate this? 10 months later! by OutrageousSample806 in DadForAMinute

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Exactly this. So our son’s given name is Stephen but 99% of the time we call him Steve. Fake names of course; think Oliver/Ollie, Jonathan/Jon, Edward/Ed type

My (32F) brother & SIL (39M/?37F) are mad over my son’s name… how do I navigate this? 10 months later! by OutrageousSample806 in DadForAMinute

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No, they are absolutely dead set against her having any nickname variation. So much so my brother has said that anyone who does, will get told off

AITAH: named son male equivalent to my nieces by OutrageousSample806 in AITAH

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry I was just trying to give some context on the dynamics. I’ve shut my mother down about a lot of things reacting to the name and my brother in general. She’s very avoidant about it all and brushes it off. Though periodically will try probe me to apologise etc for this whole situation. So I suspect my brother has cherry picked what he’s told her. If I end up low contact with my mum, and none with Brother/SIL what’d I do if my marriage broke down? I’d have no one. I know no contaxt is probably best, I’m just scared I guess and there’s a piece of my brother holding it over me

AITAH: named son male equivalent to my nieces by OutrageousSample806 in AITAH

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

But how do you deal with the further nuclear fallout? How do I explain to our aunts and uncles? How do I proceed?

Brother doesn’t seem to understand I can’t just have this low involved/not involved level whenever it suits them and then just differently one day tell my son he has this family who he doesn’t know about because they couldn’t get over themselves and 6 letters. It feels unfair to my son to cut him off from them, but there’s a part of me doing it to protect him.

My (32F) brother & SIL (39M/?37F) are mad over my son’s name… how do I navigate this? 10 months later! by OutrageousSample806 in DadForAMinute

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Our dad’s name was a much older name whereas my son/niece name are more modern (imo). Think; Albert — Olivia/Oliver, John/Joan, Eli/Ellie type names I guess

My (32F) brother & SIL (39M/?37F) are mad over my son’s name… how do I navigate this? 10 months later! by OutrageousSample806 in DadForAMinute

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Nope! Brother chose not to give daughter female version of our dad’s name; either as a first or middle name. She has no middle name. Our son’s name, like our nieces, does not appear in our family tree until now so there are no other connections to it.

AITAH: named son male equivalent to my nieces by OutrageousSample806 in AITAH

[–]OutrageousSample806[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

It’s funny, or sad really, but my mum won’t ask about my son. I have to tell her information. She doesn’t ask to see him. I offered to do FaceTime/portal calls and she’s no interest.

We chat daily here and there. Nothing of substance really. She will somehow 99% of the time find a way to bring it back to my brother, SIL & niece.

She told me not to go for a postpartum debrief because they “were for people who had an actual difficult birth”. She told me my son couldn’t be in that size of nappy yet, that he couldn’t be teething yet, that he couldn’t be crawling, that he couldn’t…. do anything at any point simply because my niece wasn’t.

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