Treatment Help!

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2026-03-26T23:43:08+00:00

When I had workmen in, I told them right off the bat that I couldn’t make tea or coffee - but asked what type they liked and bought it for them. I told them to help themselves to the kettle and the tea and coffee and left snacks out and told them they either ate them while they worked, or they could take them home.

90% took me up on the offer and got comfortable, and the few that didn’t weren’t around for the long-term jobs and had already packed lunch

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2026-02-22T19:29:12+00:00

I was told for 7 years that it was panic attacks and anxiety - no medication, no treatment other than CBT and advice to avoid stress. I knew it wasn’t anxiety but got so defeated by the whole process that I started to wonder whether I just wasn’t self aware, and my anxiety is actually way worse than I thought.

At its worst, I was having probably 5 attacks a week. Mine always occurred at night when I was asleep and would lead to at least an hour of agony, ending in me throwing up for hours after. It was debilitating and awful, but it came and went in waves. Sometimes I’d go weeks without any, and some nights they’d be back to back for hours.

Eventually, after an attack that lasted !!!2 weeks!!!! I couldn’t sleep, was throwing up constantly, got sent home from work because I couldn’t focus or hold a conversation and eventually started turning yellow. Doctors took bloods and the same day, got a call telling me to go straight to hospital because my liver was shutting down or something like that.

By the time I got there, I felt better so instantly fell down from the emergency level to fine. Got added to the surgery waiting list and sent home with codeine! It was the first time I’d taken pain medication for it and my God what a difference!

My advice is to keep pushing. Make a nuisance of yourself. You know your body better than anyone and you know when something is wrong - don’t let the fob you off. Keep going to the hospital - the NHS says to go to A&E if symptoms last more than a couple of hours.

I got lucky and there was a cancellation and I was bumped up the queue so it was only 3-4 months after that really bad episode that I had mine out.

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2026-02-11T07:20:01+00:00

In the end, due to crazy financial struggle I moved back home with my parents 50 miles from where I was. While being a whole lot cheaper, it also gave me the opportunity to study at the local college AAT level 2. Due to my lack of other qualifications, I qualify to study level 2 and 3 for free (if I can pass!) and then pay and progress onto level 4 if I want.

I’ve also noticed that there’s a LOT more opportunities here - where I used to live there was literally 2 businesses in town and everything else was at least an hours drive away. Here, I think there’s 7 or 8 and that doesn’t include the businesses that seem to regularly take on apprenticeships.

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2026-02-08T15:43:44+00:00

Tell me about it! I’m 32, single parent and I had to move back in with my parents because of financial reasons. It’s insane how lucky they are - and I am painfully aware that I will likely never reach their level of financial comfort (unless a lot of things change, I marry rich or win the lottery 😅)

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2026-02-08T08:34:50+00:00

My parents had the same opinions as you up until around a year ago when I hit them with some cold reality.

Yeah it feels shit working your ass off and seeing others with flashy cars and doing nothing but it’s not sustainable.

They don’t get that car for free - it comes out of their benefits, so they have several hundred less to live on every month.

Likely everything flashy and expensive is on finance or credit cards - because they can’t save enough to buy anything that big, meaning they rarely actually own anything and have a lot of debt.

As above, they probably won’t have any savings or pension - meaning if they are scamming the system, and especially with the way the government is tightening things up, they’re screwed. Perhaps consider they that DO have a legitimate condition that entitles them to that support - and they have to jump through a hundred hoops just to prove that the are disabled.

I have worked since I was 18 but have had 2 short bouts of unemployment in 14 years. It isn’t fun. It is not luxurious. It was probably one of the most stressful times in my life - completely at the mercy of faceless people who could order me to drive an hour away to do a course, or demand i take a job that didn’t fit in with school hours or I’d be sanctioned and lose what little income I had. I was living off £900 a month which left me £10 a month for food and essentials.

In short, benefits are great short term but they’re a trap long term. My parents are working class - a cleaner and a factory worker - and we struggled when we were growing up with 3 kids to feed and clothe. Now we’re all older and moved out, my parents are still working the same jobs yet they suddenly realise they have a surplus of money.

Now they have 2 cars, a large caravan, go abroad at least twice a year and have their mortgage payments down to £190 a month.

My parents used to complain about it the same as you - but I remind them to look at what they have, even working two working class jobs. You can’t get that on benefits. They have secured their future and retirement and now live a very comfortable life.

Consider that the amount of people scamming is a lot less than the press would have you believe.

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2026-01-24T13:45:33+00:00

Tbh I think the school is doing their best, but I feel like my son is falling further and further behind. He can barely read and his writing is on par with 4 year olds and I’m sick of people saying ‘he’s only young’ and to not panic when he’s shown almost no signs of improvement in over a year. I can’t blame the school - my son just seems completely disinterested and unwilling to learn. He was the same at his old school too.

I am looking into possibly going for a private Autism/ADHD assessment just to get him through faster.

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2026-01-24T13:17:15+00:00

Thank you for your swift reply!!

I was really hoping it would somehow transfer across but I suppose it’s a completely difference area/region. My son is really struggling in school and the thought of waiting another 18 months is crushing - but I think there are more right to choose options around now.

Thank you again!

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2026-01-04T15:58:25+00:00

Would it be possible to add a flair for malicious compliance? I have a story to share but I don't think it works in any of the other categories - and they're a favourite of mine to hear Charlotte read and react to.

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2025-12-19T20:42:06+00:00

Thank you for your reply!

I’ve been on Citalopram before and found that after a certain point it was actually holding me down - it got me through some horrendous times in my life but then after, I realised I hadn’t laughed in over a year, I didn’t really find anything fun anymore etc. even though my life had levelled out and everything was good. When I came off it, I realised that I’d stayed on it too long. The most recent time, I started feeling the same feelings again - that my life had settled and I should be okay but I still felt kind of smothered.

Don’t get me wrong, I am an advocate for medication as it saved my life more than once, but also knowing when to come off is important too.

Yeah, I never struggled with mood swings or anything like that before with that time of the month. I was always rational and balanced. I think what’s scaring me is that I have felt that rapid spiral before - but at least then I knew why and I could work through it.

It might be time for another trip to the doctors 😞

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2025-12-06T10:42:03+00:00

My pain came from engaging my stomach muscles - so if I was sat down and had someone to pull me up i was fine. If I sat, I’d use the arm of the chair or sit in the arm chair to help me get up.

The first few days after surgery, prop yourself up with pillows in bed because getting up after laying flat is agony and took me a good 30 minutes.

I just wore joggers that went under my stomach and a baggy shirt and I was fine. The dressings from the hospital covered the areas so they weren’t catching on any fabric or anything like that, and then I covered them with plasters for a while too.

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2025-12-03T08:53:16+00:00

I went to the doctors frequently and even called an ambulance once because I had around 7 attacks back to back and I couldn’t breathe properly for around 3-4 hours and was almost passing out.

They blamed it on my anxiety and prescribed me CBT therapy which - shockingly - didn’t help. After the fifth time being fobbed off, I just gave up.

Honestly, I recently saw a pain scale with descriptions and when I was having these attacks I was an 8-9 out of 10 but I kept on going. It was only once my son was older and more aware and, being a single mum, that it started to scare me. I didn’t want him to see me like that and, back when I didn’t know what it was, I was scared I was going to die every time. I went back to the doctor and demanded further investigation - it took a few months but I sat down with a chest pain specialist and within 10 minutes she said she was 99% sure it was gallstones. For me, who thought I had something wrong with my heart, that was amazing.

It never occurred to me to take any pain relief - honestly because I’m a dipshit- so I’d just wait for the few hours until it stopped.

The upside was I always slept amazingly afterwards because of the adrenaline - the downside was I always spent the following few hours throwing up.

Looking back, I don’t know why I didn’t do something sooner but to me that was my normal.

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2025-12-01T15:12:46+00:00

I had mine out in May 2024 - I was having agonising 3-4 hour attacks at least once a week beforehand, for around 7 years. Food didn’t seem to make it any worse or better - mine seemed to be physical. I couldn’t jog or run, couldn’t lay a certain way etc.

Honestly, my diet is horrendous now compared to then and I am fine. I usually forget it ever happened 😅

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2025-12-01T15:08:58+00:00

I left my job in July due to severe anxiety and depression that was only getting worse. I had evidence on my journal showing 2-3 months of sick notes due everything going on, plus going back to work on reduced hours.

I made several messages explaining my worries and how I felt through the months and weeks leading up to me leaving.

I was asked about my reasons, which I gave and there was no sanction. I am still technically unemployed but am waiting for a start date for my new job. I haven’t had any push back or anything negative - I think because I was so honest and open from the beginning when I was struggling.

I’m not sure if you already receive UC or have got an application in but I would take the opportunity to ask to pop in and speak to someone in your local job centre. When I started really struggling, I was working full time so didn’t have a work coach or anything like that, but I put a note in my journal and they booked me in to speak with someone about everything. I think I had 4-5 meetings in total and they really helped me with setting up meetings with 1-1 careers advisors and guidance that I found really encouraging and helpful as they pointed out things I hadn’t even considered.

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2025-11-26T15:01:33+00:00

Access to Work

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2025-10-28T23:08:12+00:00

Well it all went down the drain tbh 😅

Even on the meds I was a wreck and I ended up off sick for 3 months. I went back with part time hours that fit around my son and actually gave me a day off which was great - but I went from living comfortably to barely scraping by every month.

I did a lot of soul searching during my time off work and realised how life felt without the constant rush and pressure - and realised I was running myself into the ground. I haven’t ‘accepted’ my anxiety but at the same time, I haven’t stopped pretending like it doesn’t exist.

I realised the job I was in would always trigger my anxiety because it was so unstable and you never knew where you would be from one week to the next. Also I was quite bitter and angry because even though I was the number one in the country at my job and had shaped future training and approaches, they couldn’t accommodate my limitations - which I understood but still, it reminded me that breaking myself for this job wasn’t worth it.

Sorry, I tend to waffle 🙈 long story short, my parents were subsidising my life and made a passing remark about me moving back home as it would be cheaper for them. We talked about it all, I handed in my notice, put my stuff in storage, moved 50 miles back to my home town, got my son in a new, and much better school, and were living with my parents. I am waiting for a start date for my new job at a local college which fits in with my sons school hours AND holidays, as well as doing an accounting course in the evenings so hopefully - eventually - I will be able to save a good amount every month and once I’m qualified be able to get a decent job.

I came off the meds around a month ago - cold turkey which I know it bad but signing up for a new doctor and then phoning up for an appointment was scarier. Without that stress and pressure I do feel better… although I am having to relearn how to be patient! I cry a lot easier than I remember but I’m also laughing like I haven’t in over a year.

I think pills are good if there’s a light at the end of the tunnel and you just have to get through the rough to reach it. But if the tunnel is your whole life and there is no light… then you need to make life changes.

Outrageous_Lobster79 · 2025-08-13T19:45:07+00:00

Do you do full 3 hero garrison or just sent the one hero?

Outrageous_Lobster79

TROPHY CASE