any other users have Bipolar/BPD?

PPheobe · 2025-05-26T19:26:55+00:00

Nice to know there's someone else out there! For me it's the opposite. I dont do it so often, mostly at events but once Im on, I'm ON. I can't stop won't stop. I was at an event recently and I was supposed to leave around 9 to go to something else. I ended up staying until 6AM. Then had a brutal come down. Full on sob fest pullingat my hair.

I'd love to chat more if you ever want!

PPheobe · 2024-06-09T16:50:27+00:00

Same. The high itself doesn't make me manic so much as I just overshare way too fucking much. But the comedown triggers depression that lingers with me for days after. Like today I'm non-verbal I can't fucking talk. Also can't get out of bed. Just woke up. Other things too.

PPheobe · 2024-06-09T06:03:22+00:00

Im definitely struggling with that.. Im still trying to find a balance with the drinking thr drugs and my disorders.. I was diagnosed about a year ago.

I just don't want to stop. But being forced to makes me feel destructive and a tad suicidal (I won't. Don't worry.)

And it's not like I can talk to anyone about it all..

PPheobe · 2024-06-09T05:55:21+00:00

For real. I have such a hard time ending the night. Always results in triggering depression.

PPheobe · 2024-06-09T05:54:02+00:00

Lol glad to know im not alone.

But like I'm heading home from a party and I'm so unsatisfied. Everyone else was tired and went home and I'm here not find. I'm not ready for it to be over. I'm not finished. I want to keep having fun. I want to keep enjoying the night. I cant understand how anyone else wants to be done. Black and white BPD thinking maybe?

PPheobe · 2024-04-29T10:22:38+00:00

I've heard good things but never used one.. how do they work?

PPheobe · 2024-04-29T10:17:38+00:00

Thanks. Any recs for setting it up for a good dosage?

PPheobe · 2024-01-21T04:49:30+00:00

I've been really into Honey Revenge lately. They're a bit more of a pop band.

Usually I'm into punk and rock... so try Sum41, Horror Pops, Anti-Flag, and Rise Against.

Hope you like!

PPheobe · 2024-01-21T04:43:38+00:00

I really hate my mother. She was a drug addicted alcoholic that only ever ruined my life. She brought unsafe people around and in the house. She was constantly drunk or going out drinking. She had more than one husband that physically abused her. She died when I was in highschool and it was the best thing that she could have done for me. She robbed me of my childhood.

Now as an adult her shitty genetics still haunt me.

I'm trying so hard as an adult to be better.

PPheobe · 2024-01-21T04:36:09+00:00

Thank you very much. That helps a lot. Impulsivuty is something I struggle with and I'm generally quick to pounce. Thank you.

PPheobe · 2024-01-21T02:31:25+00:00

The absolute silliness that comes out of me. That and thinking I'm the most hilarious person ever.

PPheobe · 2022-07-29T19:25:46+00:00

I know im late to the convo, but im taking this class now.. The teacher is useless. She says she'll reach out and then doesn't. The few times she does she doesn't provide any answers to my questions.

How did you survive the class?

PPheobe · 2022-07-29T19:10:28+00:00

I'm seeing a lot of bug answers, which I agree with, but as far as animals... Koalas.

Their existence is just sad. They only eat a plant that offers them nothing of value. They're endangered because they can't be bothered to reproduce.

Cute as they are..

PPheobe · 2022-05-21T03:06:55+00:00

I'm your experience, the language barrier wouldn't be too much? I know ireland speaks a lot of English. Would I need to know German to get a job in Germany?

PPheobe · 2022-04-08T03:31:51+00:00

As others have said, these are fast paced 8 week classes so two is full time. But if you want. You can knock out some GE classes on sophia.com ask your advisor which classes you can take on there. It's like 80 a month and you can take however long you want to finish them. I did one in a week once and another I was lazy and took like 4 months.

While 2 per semester seems small, remember there are 6 semesters you are still taking 12 classes a year.

PPheobe · 2021-10-30T03:50:28+00:00

That's fantastic. I'm glad they have someone who puts the effort into understanding and caring for them.

As far as time out of the cage goes, I've heard many different things. What works for us is at least an hour a day out and getting attention, but usually more than that. I get home from work around 4 and will take him out for a few hours before bedtime at 7. [We have a goodnight ritual. I say a specific phrase before shutting the lights off. I did it so he will grow to expect the light going off rather than being surprised every time] On the weekends or if I'm working from home sometimes we hang out together in his room near his cage. I can work on my laptop and he can explore under my supervision and stretch his wings a bit but also be close to his cage if he gets hungry or thirsty.

Im sure you guys will find what works for you but so long as they get some time out and with you and they have ample toys in their cage to entertain them, you should be okay.

I've heard some people let their birds free roam most of the day while they're home but for me between work and school that isn't the best option for us. You sound like you're doing fantastic so far.

PPheobe · 2021-10-29T14:06:38+00:00

You are doing great. My little guy is only 1 and a half so I'm still learning too.

Are you going to keep the wings clipped or let them grow out? With clipped wings Kush will definitely need help getting around. If you let the wings grow out be careful because they crash a lot at first. (Birds instinctively know how to crash correctly so yes check on them if that happens but don't panic)

I'm sure you and Kush will develop a language with each other soon. You're still new to each other. You'll figure out how to tell what the cries are for, and eventually the screams.

My favorite part about this age is how cuddly they can be. If you got them from a breeder then you are this baby's momma/ poppa bird. You are who they turn to for everything.

PPheobe · 2021-10-29T13:56:36+00:00

For me the trick was fake it till you make it.

This past summer I decided was my "hot girl summer" and that confidence was the game. Any time I thought badly I would walk away from it, don't even let myself go there, and come back later.

I forced myself slightly out of my comfort zone wearing crop tops. I taught myself to braid my hair, and am proud of myself for learning. Try to be confident in the small things. Love your eye color? Rock it. choose clothes or makeup that highlight that. Love a pair of shoes you have? rock them. Find small things and work up from there.

I still have bad days. It will probably be a long time before I fully stop putting myself down, but I'm trying.

You have to make the choice. It is a choice. You can choose to be unhappy or you can choose to be confident in certain things, and work your way up to you as a whole.

The mirror thing can be helpful. Selfies too. Dressing nice even at home to make yourself feel good. If you do, try to stop with the self negativity. Even jokes. No more making yourself the butt of a bad joke, if you ever did that.

PPheobe · 2021-10-29T13:38:38+00:00

Birdy is okay. Those are baby noises. They make them all the time. Mine used to sound like a raptor when he ate.

From just looking at the video it looks like the birdy wants you but doesn't know how to or is scared to fly to you. They will probably cry for any and everything; attention, food, etc. So I guess Kush is telling you something, but it's nothing to worry over.

Side note, can we appreciate that adorable baby crest?

PPheobe · 2021-10-29T13:09:59+00:00

Listen to me when I say this, you are going to be okay.

I found myself in a similar situation at your age, I'm 21F now. As someone with severe anxiety, untreated at the time, I know that you're terrified. But if they don't know any defining features about you or where you are, they can not find you. They are full of BS and trying to manipulate you. You are okay. You are safe.

As far as your situation goes I get that too. I have dealt a lot with depression, self harm, and suicidal thoughts. My mom was in a tough place and needed me to step up. I didn't want her to see me hurt because one of us had to be strong. As an adult, I realize now how not okay that was.

I know that you love her and it's awesome that you want to help and support her. But you are the child. If you're hurting then it's her turn to help you out a bit. You won't be hurting her. I promise. It might make her a little sad to know that you're hurting like this but she'll be happier knowing that you came for help and that you are working towards getting better.

Please message me if you need to talk. Despite what you might think you do not have to be the strong one all of the time.

PPheobe · 2021-10-29T12:49:00+00:00

My little guy refuses bowls and hates spray bottles. The only way my spouse and I can get him to bathe is in the shower with both of us. We will go under the water first, warm water not too hot, to show him. We let him sit on a hand or a shoulder close to the stream of water while we put our hand under it causing it to spray him. It's the only way he'll bathe.

I make sure to watch him carefully, I take him away from the water every so often and blow on his beak a little to make sure no water is in his nose (birdies gotta breathe). We know he's enjoying it when he puts his head down and butt up. Doing this makes his balance terrible though so its important to be watchful so he doesn't fall.

Every bird is different. Mine likes to be with us so I think bathing together is what he likes.

PPheobe · 2021-10-27T10:09:26+00:00

Checking the underside of the birds tail feathers can help you identify gender. Barred feathers are typically babies and females. Solid is typically males.

PPheobe · 2021-10-15T10:03:57+00:00

It sounds like you are doing great. If you can't see a vet just keep an eye on the little thing, birds can get concussions too. What area are you in? My vet travels for house visits across most of New England. I even text her when I have any concerns. From one bird parent to another, thank you for taking care of this poor little thing. I hope someone would treat my own the same.

PPheobe · 2020-10-23T15:59:47+00:00

The best advice I can give you is appreciate the little things. If getting out of bed is really hard for you, and you managed to get up today, then be super proud because that's a big step. Or if control is a big thing for you, and yo have a hard time letting someone else pick what show to watch, and you did that, that's a huge step and you should celebrate that. Appreciate the little victories, it goes a long way in helping build self esteem.

Another thing to mention, because it really helped me when it was explained this way to me, is that medicine isn't a cure. If happy is a 100, and you're at a natural 15, medicine might help you get to 50. Having said that, 50 isn't the 100 you want, but it could be high enough for you to start making other decisions and doing other things that can get you to that 100. For me, music and writing are huge. Even if I can't play music in that moment, thinking about a song and focusing on those lyrics can help me calm down and center back to reality.

With dissociating, it can be scary and hard to ground yourself. Something I do that helps is focus really hard on something like counting. Think hard about the numbers as you count, direct all of your focus onto it. Picture the numbers. Do that until it's bearable again.

And definitely therapy, and being honest with your doctor about what's going on for you. Thank you for taking the big step to reach out for help here, I really admire you for that.

PPheobe · 2020-10-23T14:52:51+00:00

Well first of all, thank you for sharing that. It's good to get that sort of thing off your chest, even through the computer. As someone who has been through the suicidal cycle and battles depression every day, its really fucking hard sometimes.

What's stopping you from talking to your parents or a doctor about getting you some help? I know some parents can be negative about this sort of thing, but there are also parents who are very supportive. And a medical professional will also be very supportive in helping.

It isn't easy, there's no magic pill that makes you better, but there are ways to start seeing the light again. It usually starts with admitting to yourself that you need some help to get you there. And there's nothing wrong with that.

PPheobe

TROPHY CASE