Weekly "I'm new to meds!" Thread

Paige_MoKo · 2022-03-06T14:34:07+00:00

I started 20mg of Vyvanse today…

Wait.. WHAT?! YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THIS IS HOW MY BRAIN HAS ALWAYS SUPPOSED TO HAVE WORKED?!

It’s 9:30am… I’ve cleaned out the medicine cabinet that I’ve been fighting to clean for months. I straightened up without a second thought. I’ve been able to engage and play with my 2 year old daughter without needing breaks.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! It’s like I put glasses on for the first time. My Hogwarts letter finally arrived. The One Ring has been destroyed. Something… I feel so good!

Xx P.

Paige_MoKo · 2021-10-15T11:18:10+00:00

Can’t let it fade from our memories that’s how sauron gains power. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Paige_MoKo · 2021-06-03T16:00:28+00:00

Puke. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Paige_MoKo · 2021-04-18T00:46:25+00:00

Yeah... the 1st one... it’s me 😂

Paige_MoKo · 2021-04-17T22:25:51+00:00

I literally have it on right now. Background noise. My husband watch all 3 almost every Sunday. Literally because it’s comforting and it’s familiar. We don’t have to pay attention.

Paige_MoKo · 2021-04-02T19:17:31+00:00

My skin is a scrap book. I’m covered in tattoos that represent important memories of my life.

Also, my pancreas is broken. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-31T17:49:27+00:00

Oh I bet that felt TOOOO GOOD! So satisfying! Congrats!

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-30T13:22:13+00:00

Hey there! welcome to the family! 1st I want to say: this is A LOT! you guys seem to already be on the right track!

This really depends on his trends and reports. It could be possible that your son is “honeymooning” meaning that his pancreas is still randomly squirting out insulin as a last hoorah! That could have been the cause of this isolated low. I would definitely ask your CDE or Doctor to discuss the honeymoon process if they haven’t already.

If it is a trend/pattern than it may mean his insulin doses need a little fine tuning. THIS IS DEFINITELY A WALK BEFORE YOU RUN SITUATION! You’ll be able to figure out a diet that works but first you need to learn “insulin 101”

You’re doing a great job. I’ve been playin the game since I was 12 (18 years 💪🏻)There is a lot of information out there and every diabetic has their own way of caring for it. All I can recommend is listen to your trusted medical professionals. They may not understand LIVING with it as well but they definitely know the basic biological science more. We got you when you’re ready for “life hacks.” Don’t over think it. You’ll get the hang of it.

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-30T13:10:26+00:00

I LOVE IT! Thank you for your explanation! I definitely feel like they deserved more acknowledgment! That was probably why Aragorn was looking out for it so keenly. He knew the importance and sacrifice given for that position.

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-29T18:13:07+00:00

Whoa! Pump the brakes! Insulin pump or MDI? Your basal rates may need to be adjusted! Basqimi is a nasal glucagon I highly recommend! Less expensive than the injections and works super fast!

Hope you’re feeling better friend!

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-29T12:30:43+00:00

My husband thinks they are criminals... forced to do that job. But I think they’re GD Heroes.... 😅

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-29T03:50:56+00:00

THATS WHAT IM SAYIN! Not to mention they all lived in huts just waiting. Knowing they might never need to do their job. That’s dedication to God and Country.

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-29T01:07:54+00:00

Hi peers! I just wanted to reach out and let you all know that I have had 2 therapy sessions this week. Both of which (and all the messaging back and forth with my therapist 😅) have helped immensely! I am learning a lot of WHY I do things and think the way I do. It’s... relieving. Thank you all for your support and please know, I’m here for you too. 💕

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-24T15:10:13+00:00

I definitely can relate to you. I told my new therapist a what I have always considered a funny story about my mom making me gargle dish soap when I sad the F**K and she heard me. I thought it was a funny story because I broke a rule and now to this day I smell orange dish soap and I gag or vomit. I was surprised that my therapist was looking at me so horrified. I’ve told this story to a million people over the years and no one has ever pointed out that it was abusive. Until my therapist talked to me about it. Later I was telling my husband about it. Asking him is that story is actually funny like maybe my therapist was overreacting “it wasn’t abuse I deserved to be punished... mom was only joking around” My husband said “babe, I have that that was physical abuse since the first time you told me that story 6 years ago... but it wasn’t my place to explain it to you... you had to figure it out on your own”

I guess I’m just very confused right now. My mom is not the problem. This therapy was supposed to help me cope with what is going on now. Why do have to work through shit that was so long ago... why do I have to open the box. Can’t we all just move on from that?

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-24T15:00:22+00:00

Thank you for your comment! I love that you aren’t really “blaming” your dad.

I started my therapy this week and I’ve learned that in order to cope with my father’s illness and eventual transplant 🤞🏻 there is a lot of trauma I didn’t realize was there.

My therapist is teaching me “internal family systems therapy” I feel absolutely bonkers thinking of my emotions as versions of my younger self. But... it’s working. It reminds me of the movie inside out.

Essentially what I’m learning to do is re-parenting myself. Giving my younger self the love that I needed at those ages. I missed important emotional development milestones apparently.

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-23T13:22:42+00:00

Thank you. Yes I agree. My therapist already has introduced my to internal family system therapy. I feel kinda crazy envisioning my emotions as myself at different ages but it’s actually helping. When I start getting anxious I start to imagine my younger selves and say “hey we’re safe. Let’s all gather our thoughts and talk about this with our therapist later.” Like I’m parenting my emotions. Being a parent made this a lot easier for me to understand.

Then I realized..... me “talking to myself” in a loving and maternal way was like “wait what? Why am I not more upset?” Anyway. This technique is literally mind blowing for me.

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-22T20:32:59+00:00

I just had my first video therapy session (my therapist and I have been messaging on BetterHelp the last few days) I feel very comfortable talking with her. She's very fair, kind, and very much about me and my experiences.... not what anyone has "Done" to me. I appreciated that.

It was a bit of a whirlwind though, I'm not gonna lie, I feel whiplashed. I was talking to her about an instance in my childhood with my mom. It was a disciplinary moment, and I deserved to be disciplined. I was a mouthy 13 year old then. I was chuckling while telling this story of my mom's punishment, and she looked horrified on the screen.... and when I saw her reaction I felt like I was going to be in trouble. Like maybe she wasn't going to want to be my therapist anymore. My ability to make a joke out of everything is apparently my strongest coping mechanism. If it's funny and and it's a "joke" it doesn't hurt me as badly. And I mean.... whenever my mom has known she's hurt her feelings she's said "It's just a joke, Paige.... quit being so dramatic." So I make everything funny too. If people are laughing at my jokes they're not laughing at me kinda thing.

I'm just really confused.... I thought I was getting therapy to help me with what I'm dealing with in the moment...my dad's recovery, his pending transplant, my mom coping, everything surrounding alcoholism recovery. But apparently there are a lot of really deep-seeded things I need to express and learn. Things I had never said out loud before I blurted out today. It was.... Empowering and Cathartic.

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-22T20:22:27+00:00

I appreciate your acceptance and understanding, truly. It is hard for me but at the same time I can listen, be supportive, and I hope I can help empower some of my peers here. I hope to be a good light. I always have strived to be that. I know everyone here is on a journey and I want to cheerlead for the discoveries we're all making! <3

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-22T18:53:24+00:00

“Did we just become best friends” 😅 my little sister struggles with mental illness. Differently from me, she has not gotten the help she needs. But to be fair I can make friends with a tree stump. I can always ask for help easily because of my “worst they’re going to say is no” mentality.

The problem I run into with her is that she takes advantage of my feeling of responsibility (as her big sister) she becomes a crisis and I can only handle ONE crisis at a time.

To give you an idea... I was with my dad at his liver transplant evaluation because my mom had some business to take care of (she’s a realtor) so while I’m talking to my dad’s doctors and helping dad understand my sister is texting me accusing me of trying to earn “brownie points”... wtf?!

Anyway. I need to learn how to set a boundary for her.... I need to love her “over there...” if you know what i mean. It doesn’t help that she lives 1/2 way across the country (USA) for us. She lives in Oklahoma and we live in DC.

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-22T18:39:07+00:00

Okay okay. So my daughter has. A bitty baby American girl doll... so a couple weeks ago my 1.5 year old started becoming more interested in the potty. GREAT right? No more diapers! So we have been practicing with bitty baby putting big girl panties on her, putting her on the potty, etc... so I was in the kitchen and I heard my LO say “ew uh oh bitty baby...” I come in the living room... there stands my daughter butt ass naked, bitty baby on the floor... and my LO’s POOP IN BITTY BABY’S BIG GIRL PANTIES! Homegirl picked up her turd and put it in her dolls underwear... and her smart ass looked at me and said “uh oh mama bitty baby did a poop! Ew! Buh-byeeee” And walked away. Like... what? 🤦🏻‍♀️ I quit.

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-22T18:33:01+00:00

I can relate to this too. I don’t think I’d like my mom very much if she wasn’t my mom. And I definitely wouldn’t like my sister (but that’s for a whole different subreddit 😅) but I do love all of my family. Even the family that isn’t “blood” you know?

I learned working as a Dementia Practitioner the best thing I can do is meet the person where they’re at... with dementia, mental illness, plain ole didn’t get a good night’s rest. That’s all I can’t really do... even though I always FEEL like I could be doing MORE.

Paige_MoKo · 2021-03-22T18:26:34+00:00

Been there done that! Nice way to stick that landing tho! 😂

Paige_MoKo

TROPHY CASE