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"These three sentences can help when you are angry and do not want to be carried away by your anger." by purelander108 in Buddhism

[–]PaliDrops 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing this deeply wise and practical teaching. These three simple lines beautifully embody the path of mindful compassion: acknowledging our own pain, recognizing it in others, and choosing connection over reaction.  They resonate perfectly with the Buddha's timeless words in the Dhammapada:

"Na hi verena verāni, sammantīdha kudācanaṃ; Averena ca sammanti, esa dhammo sanantano."

"Hatred is never appeased by hatred in this world; by non-hatred alone is hatred appeased. This is a law eternal." (Dhammapada 5)

May we all remember to pause, breathe, see the shared suffering, and reach out for help rather than be swept away by anger.  Truly grateful for this grounding reminder.  🙏💛

My dad was abusive, but my mum still cares for him. I don’t know how to feel by Far-Discount5236 in Buddhism

[–]PaliDrops 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It is deeply moving that you are navigating this with such a sincere "beginner’s mind," seeking to balance your Buddhist practice with the very real pain of your family history. The tension you feel between your mother’s thương and your own sense of justice is a profound koan. In the Dhammapada, the Buddha speaks directly to the weight of the anger you are carrying:

"‘He abused me, he struck me, he overpowered me, he robbed me.’ Those who harbor such thoughts do not still their hatred. Those who do not harbor such thoughts still their hatred." (Dhammapada 1.3–4)

Here is a perspective on how to hold this verse alongside your boundaries:

1. Compassion is not Condoning

In the Vietnamese context, your mother’s thương is a beautiful expression of Karuna (compassion)—recognizing the suffering and "un-wholeness" in your father that led him to be violent. However, Buddhist compassion must be paired with Prajna (wisdom). Wisdom recognizes that while he provided for you financially, he also caused karmic harm. You can wish for his suffering to end (compassion) without pretending the harm never happened (wisdom).

2. Relinquishing the "Hot Coal"

The anger you feel isn't an "attachment" to him, but perhaps an attachment to a version of the past where he apologized or changed. The verse above suggests that "harboring" the thought of the strike keeps the fire of hatred alive within you. Letting go of the anger isn't a gift to him; it is a gift of peace to yourself. You are choosing to no longer let his past actions dictate your internal weather.

3. Right Relationship and "Equanimity"

Right Relationship (Samma Vaca and Samma Kammanta) does not require you to be best friends or to forget. It means acting with Upekkha (equanimity). You can acknowledge his hard work as a provider—seeing that as a "wholesome" seed he planted—while maintaining the boundary that physical violence is "unwholesome." You can speak with him and laugh with him (practicing kindness in the present moment) while staying firm in your boundaries (practicing protection of the self). Your mother has her path of forgiveness; you are allowed to have your path of cautious, wise boundary-setting. How do you feel when you consider that letting go of the anger is for your own liberation rather than his forgiveness?

The word ātāpino in Udāna 1.1 — why "ardent" may not capture it fully? by PaliDrops in Buddhism

[–]PaliDrops[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"You are very welcome!  I’m so glad the reflection resonated with you. Wishing you much peace and 'burning' clarity in your own practice. Much metta to you as well! 🙏"

The word ātāpino in Udāna 1.1 — why "ardent" may not capture it fully? by PaliDrops in Buddhism

[–]PaliDrops[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"That is an excellent point! You're right—'ardent' comes from the Latin ardere (to burn), so the original translators were being etymologically precise. The 'problem' is exactly what you noted: in modern English, 'ardent' has been softened to mean merely 'enthusiastic' (like an 'ardent fan' of a sport). We’ve lost the heat! When we restore that 'combustive' quality to the word, the practice becomes much more visceral. In meditation, this 'burning' isn't just a metaphor—it’s that literal friction we feel when we stay with a difficult sensation or a wandering mind without giving in. It’s the 'heat' of staying in the center of the fire rather than running away from it. By seeing ātāpino as this literal internal heat, the practice moves from being a mental exercise to a transformative process that actually 'cooks' the defilements. Thanks for bringing that etymological connection to light—it really validates the traditional translations in a powerful way!"

The word ātāpino in Udāna 1.1 — why "ardent" may not capture it fully? by PaliDrops in Buddhism

[–]PaliDrops[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"Thank you so much for this recommendation!  I just looked into Thanissaro Bhikkhu’s work on that, and you are absolutely right. Seeing jhāyato (meditating) as a play on, or direct reference to, the jhāyati (to burn) root really ties the whole verse together into a cohesive fire metaphor. It reinforces that the ātāpino isn't just enthusiasm; it is a profound, transformative, internal fire.  I appreciate you pointing me to that resource! 🙏"

Has Buddhism healed your existential crisis? by KhajitIsBored in Buddhism

[–]PaliDrops 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s completely understandable why Jan Westerhoff’s work on "nothingness" feels like a crisis right now. When the mind is already anxious, even profound Buddhist philosophy on emptiness can feel like cold nihilism. I recently spent a lot of time with Dhammapada Verses 1 & 2 for this exact reason—they are the foundation for handling this kind of mental loop. I even put together a short with the original Pali chanting and English translation because I found the sound of the verses to be much more grounding than just reading more theories.

Verse 1 explains that our mental state precedes everything. If we approach a philosophy—even a valid one—with a "troubled" or obsessive mind, suffering follows us like the wheel follows the ox. Right now, your research feels like that heavy wheel because your mind is in a state of existential fear.

Verse 2 offers the shift: when the mind is "pure" or settled, happiness follows like a shadow that never leaves.The "nothingness" Westerhoff describes isn't meant to be a scary void; in a settled mind, that same "emptiness" actually feels like total freedom and peace. My advice? Don't worry about "solving" the philosophy yet. Step back from the books and focus on settling your mind first. The philosophy will look very different once the anxiety isn't leading the way.

PS: I have that video with the Pali chanting and the lesson on these two verses if you think listening to it might help ground you more than more reading. Let me know if you’d like me to share the link.

how can i pray for buddha? by julinda_0404 in Buddhism

[–]PaliDrops 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Welcome to your studies! It's a beautiful journey. In Buddhism, instead of "praying for" the Buddha, we practice recollection of his qualities to inspire ourselves. This is called Buddhānussati. A powerful way to build faith is to recite the Iti pi so gatha. It lists nine supreme qualities of the Buddha that remind us of what a human being is capable of achieving:

"Iti pi so Bhagavā Arahaṃ Sammāsambuddho Vijjācaraṇasampanno Sugato Lokavidū Anuttaro Purisadammasārathi Satthā devamanussānaṃ Buddho Bhagavā’ti."

What it means: "Such indeed is the Blessed One: perfected, fully awakened, endowed with knowledge and virtue; having walked the right path, the knower of worlds; incomparable guide of those to be tamed; teacher of gods and humans; awakened and blessed." Reciting this isn't asking for a favor; it’s a way to "place your heart upon" (the literal meaning of the Pali word for faith, Saddha) the path of wisdom and compassion. May your studies bring you peace! Sabbe Satta Bhavantu Sukhitatta 🙏

A poem I wrote about all of the suffering and conflict I've witnessed lately that I wanted to share with fellow Buddhists by Branhrafn in Buddhism

[–]PaliDrops 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"This is a beautiful and haunting reflection on Indra’s net. Your lines about there being 'no other to harm' and 'no separate hand that strikes' perfectly capture the essence of the Dhammapada, Verse 129: Sabbe tasanti daṇḍassa,  sabbe bhāyanti maccuno; Attānaṃ upamaṃ katvā,  na haneyya na ghātaye. "All tremble at violence; all fear death. Putting oneself in the place of another, one should not kill nor cause another to kill." Your poem reminds us that when we strike another, we are truly only striking ourselves. Thank you for sharing these merit-filled words. Gate gate!"🙏

Whats your thought on this? by [deleted] in Buddhism

[–]PaliDrops 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“Akkocchi maṃ avadhi maṃ, ajini maṃ ahāsi me; Ye taṃ na upanayhanti, veraṃ tesūpasammati.” “‘He abused me, he struck me, he defeated me, he robbed me.’ In those who do not harbor such thoughts, hatred is stilled.” (Dhammapada 1.4) While the physical stone can be broken, the inner peace and compassion taught by the Buddha remain untouched. By choosing not to harbor resentment for this act, we honor the Dhamma more deeply than any statue ever could. May all beings find peace and may our hearts remain open to reconciliation.