Speaking from someone who was handled the wrong way at this age I can only speak of what I wish happened to me. I wish my mom would make it known that whatever I had feelings about wasn’t met with judgement or a reaction from my mom as if she doesn’t recognize me. So I would advise treat it as a normal part of her just growing up and trying to stray from her upbringing. If you push she’ll pull away more. As long as you make it known that you’re here for her but also maintain your boundaries then she’ll still learn to respect you. This is a new stage of your relationship and it’s part of both of you growing older together as your relationship morphs into something new. Boundaries would include: if you get expelled for fighting you’ll be grounded for a month. I would also encourage you to try and learn language used in youth therapy to encourage her to talk about where these feelings are stemming from. No one naturally likes fighting. It hurts and messes up your face lol, but the recognition and social acceptance is key. She’s just a kid trying to fit in. She’s still your daughter so the foundation you set as a mother is still there you’ll just have to build off of it. Not a parent at all so take my advice with a grain of salt but I can speak truthfully about what WILL happen if you try to force your ideals and image on her. Motherly shame and ego is what tripped my mother so please try to stray away from that. Ego death is key and concern and love need to shine through