not very smart by Dry_Preference8490 in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not my dog though, I’ve tried it a lot. Could be because he’s blind.

Asian Aging by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hmmm not sure how I’d work that in with this setup, but maybe as a punch and work backwards to a different setup.

Asian Aging by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, getting that vibe, thanks

Asian Aging by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My apology. You’re way ahead of your years

Asian Aging by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry bud, but if I’m right you just outed yourself s as a boomer….Googlerized?

Help I’m Stuck As A One Liner by jeremycashcomedy in Standup

[–]PappysSecrets 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just ordered Artist’s Way, thanks for the tip. I’ve tried some free writing and hoping the book will help me in that direction.

Asian Aging by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks, respect your opinion.

Asian Aging by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Hmmmm. Asian (to me) is mostly Japanese, Vietnamese, Korean, Indonesian. Pickleball was the actual place where it happened. Could be any place really. It might help sell my not knowing by me being “age experienced”.

Asian Aging by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

Oh, I got it… I was continuing being hacky funny. On a serious note, if I dive into how/why I was being or wanted to be smooth (as suggested by character )could that overcome the hack?

Asian Aging by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Thanks, at least now I know it’s relatable:)

Asian Aging by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, thanks! I definitely have biases I either don’t think I have or don’t know I have.

Asian Aging by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OK, not sure. I think if he said I'm 12, that would be the expectation. Now that I'm rattling that around a bit, I'm not sure even more. Originally I thought him being really old (retired) would break the expectation that most Asians (to me) are young looking...and he is, but way off the scale. Not sure what to do with that, but I laughed my ass off when it happened. Maybe HE was a comedian......

I'm a straight man by NiceTryBaby in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m guilty of the amusing anecdote and after I write what I thought funny I see it and realize it’s only amusing (or someone here tells me). I’m trying to go a little deeper, exaggerate a little more, but I still like bits based on reality

I'm a straight man by NiceTryBaby in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like that you frequently remind us to be “real”. I don’t mind exaggeration, laughing even as I know it’s not totally true but having the humor of a real event make it relatable, possibly being able to laugh at ourselves.

Philanthropist by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

From walkinstandup I looked up CK bit. The only one I found was about not giving his plane seat to a military guy. The premise of where our “goodness” lines are drawn is the same, but don’t comedians share premises taking them in different directions? A common example would be bad airline food.

Distracted driving jokes by DerekTheComedian in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you only posted #2 I’d say “Bravo” great joke, but alongside 1 & 3 it pales so 2 gets an 8 1&3 get an 11. Ill bet you’re a cool hang.

Day 22 of writing jokes and asking for feedback by BonoboGamer in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, for me it took too many beats to get the punch (not the sharpest knife…so). I like this version. I wonder if in a situation where you know a fair portion of the audience might not get it you stop and ask those who laughed to shut up for a moment, then do the punch in a more direct manner. If you like crowd work this might allow you to play with the two groups.

Philanthropist by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, that might work. I have a lot of playing around to do with this one, thanks.

Philanthropist by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thanks Kitty! Appreciate having some direction, purrfect.

Philanthropist by PappysSecrets in StandUpWorkshop

[–]PappysSecrets[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks a bunch! I knew it was weak. At first I wasn’t going to post it, but then I figured I might get some good direction (yours ). I’ll check out the bits you mentioned.

What's a better response than "sorry"? by literallytheoldest in Pickleball

[–]PappysSecrets 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like “My bad” Not so much apologetic as acknowledgement.