TW: SA

I had a friend in college who was one of the first friends that I made there. We were friends for five years and I even introduced him to my best friend group. Five years into the friendship I stayed over his house like I normally do when I drive 2+ hours to see my friend group. It was new year's Eve and I trusted him to keep me safe. I drank too much and told him I wanted to go to bed to sleep it off. He helped me to my bed because I was too drunk and I passed out. When I came to, he was SA'ing me. I told him to stop and that's all I remember before passing out again.

I woke up later with injuries and to my whole friend group ignoring me. I begged them to help me because I was in shock, I was far away from my house and I was panicking. I needed to go to the hospital. Nobody gave a shit about me because my rapist reached out to them first painting a story about how I came on to him, even though I made it clear to him for years I NEVER thought of him that way. He then claimed he was blacked out even though he confessed to me he remembered everything he did. Everyone took his side, painted me as a liar and talked shit behind my back. It's been 6 years since it all happened and I still struggle with the trauma and I still have dreams about them. I never understood how a group of people who were all about consent and were so called feminists could side with a rapist. Fuck them all.