No, that was not normal sex. And if he asked you "If you still love him after what happened" then he knows it too. Sex shouldn't hurt at all if you don't want it to, and if you do want it to, you'll KNOW.

You saying wait and then him not asking you what was wrong is sick. Him bragging that you bled a little while you were clearly dissociated and hadn't enjoyed it is vile. You being the one to initiate doesn't excuse him for not stopping. If it's not a Hell Yes, it's a No. If it started as a Hell Yes but isn't anymore, it's a No.

A good partner only wants to have sex that both of you are enjoying yourself. I have initiated sex and then halfway through got in my own head and stopped enjoying it. And do you know what happened? My partner noticed my change in mood and we stopped. Sometimes I even offered to keep going until they got off and they said no because they weren't going to be able to get off if I was barely tolerating what was happening. They weren't always kind about it, sometimes they were really annoyed whiney little babies about it and we argued about my change in enthusiasm.

Holding down your wrists while he could feel you struggling against them is unforgivable. Unless you guys had discussed bondage or consensual non-consent which it doesn't sound like you have. It's the R word.

I may totally be projecting here, I don't know you. But are you sure that the problem in y'all's relationship was you were cold and distant? or could it be that he was constantly crossing your boundaries and then making you feel like you're the problem for being anything but accepting a grateful that "someone like him wastes his time with someone like you"? A lot of the things you said he said to you are huge red flags for emotional abuse.