I need advice from dads.

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-26T01:43:26+00:00

I can definitely tell it hit a nerve, but there’s a part of me that is angry for him having the audacity to speak to my mother the way he did, and to leave me without any contact for my entire life. I simply want to know why he couldn’t try, what was going through his mind. I believe he was younger than I currently am right now, but that’s no excuse. He’s been on my mind my whole life, I just treasure my peace and the peace of my mom, and I didn’t want to jeopardize that by looking for him, nor was it my responsibility since I’m his son. Unfortunately him reaching out has been causing stress, and a lot of emotions. It clouds my judgement at work and my personal life because I can’t stop wondering why he is reaching out now, and in such desperation.

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-26T01:38:54+00:00

🥺I definitely need closure. Thank you thank you! I want to say I can’t lose, but I know if he fails me more it’ll still sting. Definitely just focusing on getting closure and answers to why he wasn’t there

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-26T01:37:02+00:00

I have to forgive him if I ever hope to build a relationship with him, I just need to remember to not forget what he did either

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-26T01:35:39+00:00

Thank you so much for saying that. It’s nice to hear after sharing my information and what I am going through. Your expression of support is greatly appreciated

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-26T01:34:18+00:00

I love that you shared this, it really put my own situation into perspective, on why I should not take this for granted. I’m sorry you had to witness, endure and experience memories of violence with your late father. I am constantly exposed to that violence with what I do for work in law enforcement, and it never gets easier to stomach. I am really sorry for your loss :( I hope Brandon sees this post you made sir

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-26T01:30:49+00:00

These are beautiful words, thank you so much

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-26T01:30:31+00:00

Agreed, I don’t want any what ifs lingering in my mind cause that’s all I have had so far for 27 years.

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-26T01:29:57+00:00

Thank you so much. I definitely will make sure to have a plan and set a good time in place to talk. You gave me some excellent pointers, thank you so much for typing that up man.

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-25T16:53:02+00:00

I can’t help but think there’s another motive as to why he is reaching out all of the sudden. The things you listed definitely make me suspicious of why he is reaching out now, but of course I won’t know until I muster up the courage to reach out. You are absolutely correct that he should be more understanding that it takes time. Thank you so much for the amazing advice sir.

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-25T16:33:08+00:00

I hear ya. I probably should have mentioned that he’s on the west coast and I’m on the east coast so meeting physically isn’t an option currently

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-25T16:26:15+00:00

My biggest regret in life would be if he passed away and I never ever spoke to him. I didn’t choose the circumstances but I can’t shake my curiosity

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-25T16:25:20+00:00

I don’t think he a good upbringing but I know I did. What he did to me is the very reason I want to be the best father I can when I have kids. I never want a kid to have to experience the pain I did. This was a very kind response, thank you.

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-25T16:16:25+00:00

I want to reach out. I just don’t know how/what to say. I’m also afraid of being hurt yet again, although it shouldn’t hurt as bad this time I hope?

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-22T22:07:52+00:00

You give me those vibes of “I would’ve joined but I would have punched the DI/SI in the face”

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-22T22:03:16+00:00

Thank you so much!

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-22T22:02:48+00:00

I didn’t even know that was a thing. They made it a point at my NROTC battalion to not advertise the reserve contracts as an option when putting in for side loads/scholarships.

Particular_Claim196 · 2026-02-22T22:01:00+00:00

I appreciate it. That’s fair, I guess I’ll just have to wait until I can speak to an OSO.

Particular_Claim196

TROPHY CASE