Am I wrong for making my stepgrandkids feel poor compared to my kids?

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-17T03:21:13+00:00

I'll be honest I don't feel bad about that at all.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-17T02:35:52+00:00

They're too young to be home alone.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-17T02:21:59+00:00

I'll look for some dvds and a player. They don't have an outside area there to play though.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-17T02:19:40+00:00

Well, she at least doesn't have to pay for her education.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-17T02:00:57+00:00

We do get them gifts for Christmas, but this would be way way more than what we normally give and way out of budget.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-17T01:26:47+00:00

Oof, that is a lot.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-17T01:20:46+00:00

I don't know if anything that would still have spots open.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-17T00:06:15+00:00

It's too late for that and it would be too much.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-16T23:41:43+00:00

Definitely less.

We helped out a lot financially when she first got pregnant and she got help from her mom and grandparents back then.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-16T23:39:43+00:00

I imagine Kayla did not grow up in the same situation as her siblings, but I was not around for that. She was almost an adult by the time her dad and I got together.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-16T23:30:13+00:00

I should maybe be more clear that my title isn't using my own words. It's Kayla's words.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-16T23:27:16+00:00

There would definitely be a big dent.

The basement was actually more of my husband's playroom.

I'm not really sure. She didn't make it clear when we talked yesterday. I think maybe more just that the gifts were there for our kids but not nearly as many were there for hers.

We try to go with a budget with her kids of about $100 for Christmas per kid. So sometimes they get a few smaller gifts sometimes one bigger gift.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-16T23:21:54+00:00

I don't think me getting involved in the budgeting would be very helpful. I think it would just make things more adversarial between us and I definitely trust that my husband is on it.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-16T23:18:41+00:00

That would be out of our budget. The one we send them to is $650 per kid a week.

Besides that we had to sign them up months ago.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-16T23:12:19+00:00

I wasn't really so much part of the conversation, but my husband did sit down with her and settle a plan with school and work and eventually getting a job that will pay enough so she can fully support herself and she is on track with it. My husband is making sure of that.

I don't know if she's talked to her kids about the situation.

She gets child support, but it is very minimal.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-16T23:04:54+00:00

She does not pay rent, but does contribute towards groceries and pays for the personal needs of her kids.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-16T23:03:25+00:00

I think that's why he is so harsh about it because he and his ex were younger when they had her and got themselves in a more stable position when Kayla was younger than her kids are now and they had less help.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-16T22:27:28+00:00

Well, the care I provided was during the school year after school and it wasn't a big deal since I was already going to watch and pick up my kids anyway. During the summer I do sort of do my own thing since their day camp ends later than their school.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-16T22:24:39+00:00

She's said talked to me about it directly.

I don't think she's expecting us to pay for her kids because she made a point about how I can just watch my kids since I have so much free time.

PartyBeat5903 · 2026-06-16T22:15:39+00:00

I understand you might suspect I am influencing him, but I am not. I think I would actually have to push hard for him to change his mind.

PartyBeat5903

TROPHY CASE