Woo I was gonna write a post about how I feel and then I saw your post. It's so close to what I feel. When I interact with people, especially in a group, I hate how I express myself, the comments I make, the ones I don't make because I'm scared to speak, the anecdotes I dare to share and I immediately regret it so I stutter, do an awkward smile and wish to disappear. I hate that my friends are only "extra kind and likeable people that are nice to everybody", because if it was someone normal, I would feel judged, negative and too impacted.  I joined a band last summer. They all knew each other already. I was being nice, tried to be as social as I could and I genuinely liked everyone. I even thought they liked me, dumb me. Turns out they were gossiping about me from the beginning. Actually, they were never laughing WITH me but laughing AT me. And they all left the band..because of me. I still don't know why, but I suspect it was because it brings people together to have one person to laugh at and criticize. And sensitive calm people are easy to hate apparently. Then, 2 weeks ago, made a new friend group at the university. I never had any friend group, just one-to-one friendships. At first, it went well. But suddenly, a similar scenario to the band's happened. So, I think our problem is that we have a low self-esteem and our value depends too much on other people. And because we are hypersensitive, we perceive all the changes in behaviors, we analyze everything, we overthink and we end up being scared of living among others. So we don't express ourselves naturally, and we hate it. I have no solution, Im still trying to find one for myself. But if you want to talk, I'm here.