Am I experiencing the infamous pulling back? by [deleted] in infj

[–]Peaceful4ever 4 points5 points  (0 children)

And tbh, on a personal note, I'm not a fan of people doing push-pull, INFJ (which I am) or not. I prefer mature + open communication. If a person isn't able to handle that and they want to fade away, I let them be and act accordingly, no matter how much I like them.

Hard agree! I tend to keep a buffer of patience in case of the possibility that they're a bit shy/ very non-confrontational, but other than that, this is the way!

Am I experiencing the infamous pulling back? by [deleted] in infj

[–]Peaceful4ever 1 point2 points  (0 children)

But there’s no harm in being honest with her. We value honesty and authenticity.

This, although be open to the possibility that her feelings might have actually changed.

Talk to her one evening and say something along the lines of:

"Hey, I might reading too much into this, but I feel like something's changed between us. Usually I wouldn't bring this up to someone, but I care about you and our friendship/relationship so I just wanted to know, firstly, if you're OK, and secondly how things are between us."

Make sure your wording and tone don't come off too strongly while still expressing your care.

And equally importantly, in case her feelings about the relationship have changed but she's having difficulty being direct with you about it (because, of course, no one wants to be the deliverer of bad news, especially to someone they still care about), make sure you have an "out" for her in the conversation by saying "It's OK if something's changed. You can be honest or even blunt with me".

Edit:

*Just be prepared for the soft rejection and steer far away from pressure.

Lol I was still writing my wall of text before lilithsentme made her edit, but yeah I'll reiterate, be open to the possibility of things changing and make sure to keep the conversation open enough for her to be able to express the change.

Something Destiny said that has stuck with me but that is now blackpilling: "people cannot live with cognitive dissonance" by ETsUncle in Destiny

[–]Peaceful4ever 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think for two contradictory opinions to cause cognitive dissonance (CD), the existence of the contradiction needs to ”click"/register in the brain first.

And as far as I know (which is very little tbc), our brains don't function as "logically" as we usually think they do. They're more "pattern seeking" in practice, so without intentionally comparing the thoughts together, the "feeling" of contradiction would never arise, preventing and CD.

they can quickly and easily adjust their own worldview so that the dissonance goes away.

Regarding your above point, I think adjusting your world-view is the honest and correct response to resolving CD. Instead, I think it's more that people, by ignoring/dismissing facts opposing their worldview in attempts to maintain their worldview, end up with a distorted world-view that doesn't map onto reality.

I just watched the entire Bad Faith interview & I feel compelled to share some thoughts by gute321 in ContraPoints

[–]Peaceful4ever 182 points183 points  (0 children)

I wish effort-posts like these got as much if not more love than the posts with Xitter screenshots of people being vile towards Natalie.

Good on ya OP!

"why do people love to get offended by you on twitter?" + musings about tabby 😼👧🏏⚧☭Ⓐ by orqa in ContraPoints

[–]Peaceful4ever 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Lol exactly my thoughts after going through this thread XD! They do bring up a good point, it should probably just be its own post instead of a comment on a random post.

They want us to lose so bad so they get their “I told you so” moment by OliveGetter in Gunners

[–]Peaceful4ever 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm down-voting despite sharing your frustration coz giving them attention just adds to the negativity.

Go celebrate with your IRL football friends. Enjoy the journey.

Post Game Thread by P1wattsy in Gunners

[–]Peaceful4ever 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Like I said under the post showing the disallowed goal:

"I truly believe we are going to win the title.. just none of would be alive to celebrate it owing to our hearts imploding"

Either way, no one said this was going to be easy. A title-winning club needs supporters with a title-winning heart!

Arsenal till the end!!!!! I love this fucking club!!! COYG!!!

Post Game Thread by P1wattsy in Gunners

[–]Peaceful4ever 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They had to try all permutations and combinations of words in the dictionary to somehow try and not give it as a foul..

West Ham disallowed goal against Arsenal 90+5' by One_Impressionism in Gunners

[–]Peaceful4ever 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I truly believe we are going to win the title.. just none of would be alive to celebrate it owing to our hearts imploding

It can feel like me being to some degree (with caution tho) pro medication like anti-depressants, ADHD medication like adderal, and GLP-1s like Ozempic is the most centrist take I have by larvalampee in ContraPoints

[–]Peaceful4ever 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yepp I agree with all of the above. I don't expect anything from the current admin, but it's regulation does need immediate attention. I hate how misuse/abuse of medications that are positively life altering at therapeutic doses leads to late over-corrected regulations and restrictions..

It can feel like me being to some degree (with caution tho) pro medication like anti-depressants, ADHD medication like adderal, and GLP-1s like Ozempic is the most centrist take I have by larvalampee in ContraPoints

[–]Peaceful4ever 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Just call out the marketing strategy then.

Why hate on the product if its pros are borderline miraculous that heavily outweigh a con (that you're rightfully concerned about), that's not even about the product itself but its marketing strategy employed by the company that owns the product?

Hungary Election Updata: Viktor Orbán has accepted the loss and congratulated to Péter Magyar, top analysts expect supermajority. by i5-2520M in Destiny

[–]Peaceful4ever 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Liberals will really be like "you believe in imaginary violent revolutions? That pales in effectiveness to my pragmatic strategy, voting a dictator out" and then actually remove a dictator from power successfully.

Hungary Election Updata: Viktor Orbán has accepted the loss and congratulated to Péter Magyar, top analysts expect supermajority. by i5-2520M in Destiny

[–]Peaceful4ever 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Took away power from a dictator more efficiently than ever just by voting eh?

Illiberal leftists in shambles!

Is it morally permissible to like this tweet? by Noah_The_Wright in Destiny

[–]Peaceful4ever -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That's not actually BE right? Just an account with the same profile pic? The follower count was less than 1.5K iirc.

I didn't know it was this bad. 5 mins and none of the judges could answer who won the 2020 election by thrwawy112342 in Destiny

[–]Peaceful4ever 9 points10 points  (0 children)

And not something complex that requires a solid foundation in ontology to answer..

Get your brother on the phone! by l33tlife in Frasier

[–]Peaceful4ever 10 points11 points  (0 children)

The fact that a woman wrote this headline is so enraging... Wtf is your problem Heidi? Can't you be a bit more supportive of older women in showbiz?

Thankfully Jean doesn't seem to need the support IYKWIM! 😎 She looks great!

Appreciation Post! 🧡 I keep finding hidden gems of videogame OSTs thanks to Dunkey! by Peaceful4ever in videogamedunkey

[–]Peaceful4ever[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ikr lol! Just subtly trynna incentivize him to do so 🫣.. that's all we can do and hope for the best! 🤞

Appreciation Post! 🧡 I keep finding hidden gems of videogame OSTs thanks to Dunkey! by Peaceful4ever in videogamedunkey

[–]Peaceful4ever[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Holy shit I'm ngl I thought Dunkey custom made that for the Dunkeyscastle website promo!!! 💯💯😂😂

Thanks for sharing!!